Hey guys 7/10 so far. I am finding it harder to not strike up conversations with strangers. Should be done by wednesday at latest. Friday night i am hitting clubs so am looking forward to get week 3 underway on the dot!
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Winter BC WEEK 2
- Thread starter Al Moh.
- Start date
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
milo
Don Juan
Could someone post an example of one of the the conversation you've made? I need some inspiration, I'm kind of stuck at 0/10 again. 
Furyguy
Senior Don Juan
I started a bunch with **** like "How'd you do on that homework last night?" or "Did you buy the text book for this class yes?"
Also, "Hello, my name is Furyguy" really is ****ing great. Honestly, just try it.
"What's your name?" does a lot as well.
Or pretend you know them, "Oh my god how are you, how was your summer?" And just keep asking dumb questions and see how long they pretend to recognize you because they're too embarrassed to ask who you are. Then when they say "Do I know you???" say "No" and just keep going. Or introduce yourself, your call.
Say anything stupid to be honest, the more random your opening line, the more challenging it is to actually continue the conversation, hence the more your skills will improve from having tried.
If you're really that ****ing nervous then get a little bit drunk or something first. You could always pretend you're taking a poll for a survey or project, too.
Also, "Hello, my name is Furyguy" really is ****ing great. Honestly, just try it.
"What's your name?" does a lot as well.
Or pretend you know them, "Oh my god how are you, how was your summer?" And just keep asking dumb questions and see how long they pretend to recognize you because they're too embarrassed to ask who you are. Then when they say "Do I know you???" say "No" and just keep going. Or introduce yourself, your call.
Say anything stupid to be honest, the more random your opening line, the more challenging it is to actually continue the conversation, hence the more your skills will improve from having tried.
If you're really that ****ing nervous then get a little bit drunk or something first. You could always pretend you're taking a poll for a survey or project, too.
bobterminator84
Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 24, 2008
- Messages
- 23
- Reaction score
- 0
its christmas,people go crazy about shoping,just ask if they get all the presents,ask some advice on shoping,where is good to go,then ask them somethink about them self,if they live in the area or visiting,how long they have lived there,why there moved,if they like it better...etc,by this time they should be talking...
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Nearly done for this week. Going to take another trip to town tomorrow and try to finish off. Failing that im going out on Thursday night on my own and will have no option to talk to people as I will be on my own. I don't want to do this yet but if needs be thats my back up plan.
All the guys struggling to do this I am too. But im not going out on week 2 I want this too bad. Im not going to let 10 strangers stand in my way, too proud to let 10 random people stop me.
First day I tried this 10 convo thing I actually told myself how much I want this. And before I left my house I vowed I will not come back until I do this, I was serious I gave my self no other option. I think I can get so much out of this and it will be so hard for me, if I follow this whole thing through I will have so much respect for myself. Im sure it will be worth all the nervousness some of the Tasks bring with them.
Focus, dissiplin and Corrage. I want these to be a part of me failing will not give me this.
Milo and Saturos....... screw what other people think talk about what you want. You are not there to entertain 10 people. Your mission is to talk to to random people for at least 2 min just go out there and do. This week is so HARD TO FAIL you will only fail if you MAKE yourself fail!
All the guys struggling to do this I am too. But im not going out on week 2 I want this too bad. Im not going to let 10 strangers stand in my way, too proud to let 10 random people stop me.
First day I tried this 10 convo thing I actually told myself how much I want this. And before I left my house I vowed I will not come back until I do this, I was serious I gave my self no other option. I think I can get so much out of this and it will be so hard for me, if I follow this whole thing through I will have so much respect for myself. Im sure it will be worth all the nervousness some of the Tasks bring with them.
Focus, dissiplin and Corrage. I want these to be a part of me failing will not give me this.
Milo and Saturos....... screw what other people think talk about what you want. You are not there to entertain 10 people. Your mission is to talk to to random people for at least 2 min just go out there and do. This week is so HARD TO FAIL you will only fail if you MAKE yourself fail!
Keep it up guys. Remember, the only one who is standing in your way are you! Those people don't really care what you do. In fact you are probably enver going to see them again.
You're doing yourself AND them a favor. Most people are bored. They wish to talk to other people but they don't do it because they are just as afraid as you are. They will respect you for the courage to approach them.
Always think of the rewards that await you. Being able to talk to anyone, everywhere is going to serve you throughout your whole life, not just with women.
Let's keep moving with strength and fortitude!
You're doing yourself AND them a favor. Most people are bored. They wish to talk to other people but they don't do it because they are just as afraid as you are. They will respect you for the courage to approach them.
Always think of the rewards that await you. Being able to talk to anyone, everywhere is going to serve you throughout your whole life, not just with women.
Let's keep moving with strength and fortitude!
Oh yeah thought id add this. When walking around trying to talk to strangers it reminded me of a friend I had when i was 14. He was a 100% natural lady killer even back then he would walk upto girls in the middle of the street and hit on them.
I will always rememeber the time we were out shopping. Out of nowhere he just walked up to a mother and daughter which were shopping and came out with this.
Rhys "Hi, you are very beautiful. Is this your daughter?"
Mom looking confused "Yes"
Rhys "I thought so. I can clearly see where she gets here good looks from." "May I talk to her one second?"
Mom looking really flustered and confused "No"
Rhyy "ok nice talking to you'
He never cared he just done it for kicks self amusement . 10 years later I still look back and respect him for his balls. Oh yeah the daughter could not take here eyes of little Rhys as he walked away with a smirk on his face!
I dare someone to use little Rhys opener when they are out trying to get there 10 conversations. I would love to here that report, anyone man enough im clearly not yet!
I will always rememeber the time we were out shopping. Out of nowhere he just walked up to a mother and daughter which were shopping and came out with this.
Rhys "Hi, you are very beautiful. Is this your daughter?"
Mom looking confused "Yes"
Rhys "I thought so. I can clearly see where she gets here good looks from." "May I talk to her one second?"
Mom looking really flustered and confused "No"
Rhyy "ok nice talking to you'
He never cared he just done it for kicks self amusement . 10 years later I still look back and respect him for his balls. Oh yeah the daughter could not take here eyes of little Rhys as he walked away with a smirk on his face!
I dare someone to use little Rhys opener when they are out trying to get there 10 conversations. I would love to here that report, anyone man enough im clearly not yet!
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
WalkingStick
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 12, 2008
- Messages
- 200
- Reaction score
- 4
Furyguy said:
Haha, I really like this. I'm actually going to use it. I hope nobody calls me on it too soon!
Donnnnnneeeee
Notes:
1) Talking about them is key. Try to relate to their situation and you'll get your convo, sometimes even longer than you wanted it to be
2) I took the smiling from last week a little too far Remember, like fingz said, smiling is like an occasional sunburst, most of they time put your relaxed and cool "gameface" on.
Notes:
1) Talking about them is key. Try to relate to their situation and you'll get your convo, sometimes even longer than you wanted it to be
2) I took the smiling from last week a little too far
Remember, like fingz said, smiling is like an occasional sunburst, most of they time put your relaxed and cool "gameface" on.milo
Don Juan
Ok, I'm a lazy fvcker, again its the last day of the week and I've not completed the excersise, actually I haven't had even a single conversation of 2+ min with any stranger.
It's just that doing this feels really strange to me, like it's not something that could even come close to align with my actual personality, but that's the reason I'm doing this I guess, because I'm sick of being who I am, or who I think I'm at least.
I'm taking Evolve's mindset now, I will go out right now and not come home until I complete this.
It's just that doing this feels really strange to me, like it's not something that could even come close to align with my actual personality, but that's the reason I'm doing this I guess, because I'm sick of being who I am, or who I think I'm at least.
I'm taking Evolve's mindset now, I will go out right now and not come home until I complete this.
Eventually...
I also left my work mostly for today - had 3 convo's with strangers during the week and today I did the other 7.
Yeah, talking about them is what keeps their interest, especially if you slide a sublte compliment now and then.
If I see a girl waiting next to a mall I tell her that I'm waiting too and talking to smbd is much more fun than waiting alone - works very good everytime.
Man I gotta do the work during the week, cause today I walked for like 5 hours because I left it all for the last moment.
Congrats to those who made it!!!
I also left my work mostly for today - had 3 convo's with strangers during the week and today I did the other 7.
Yeah, talking about them is what keeps their interest, especially if you slide a sublte compliment now and then.
If I see a girl waiting next to a mall I tell her that I'm waiting too and talking to smbd is much more fun than waiting alone - works very good everytime.
Man I gotta do the work during the week, cause today I walked for like 5 hours because I left it all for the last moment.
Congrats to those who made it!!!
bobterminator84
Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 24, 2008
- Messages
- 23
- Reaction score
- 0
ok,im done as well,it wasnt that bad..found it strange to ask questions strangers,but u ar right,people like it when u ask them about themself,they love to talk about themself... looking forvard to next week...
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
WalkingStick
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 12, 2008
- Messages
- 200
- Reaction score
- 4
well that took longer than I expected!
I learned that it's much harder to start a convo with a "moving target" that is, they are literally walking somewhere/doing something. Grocery stores are not the best place to do this task! I also found it much easier to talk to older people and employees who were on duty (possibly because they present "moving targets" less?). My biggest trouble was with keeping a conversation interesting once started. Anyone have some advice for the future?
My most interesting convo was with an old man named Ed. He was a greeter at a store I walked into at night. It was pretty much empty and he looked like he could use something to do. The thing I love about talking to seniors is that they have so many stories to share. He told me of his college days and the time he met the world's tallest man (at the time). Toward the end of our convo he even pointed me in the direction of an attractive co-worker of his. What a guy.
I never did get a chance to use that line (How have you been!?!?). I never really saw anyone my age and it seems like it would be weird saying that to someone much older. I'll definitely use it in the next assignment.
I learned that it's much harder to start a convo with a "moving target" that is, they are literally walking somewhere/doing something. Grocery stores are not the best place to do this task! I also found it much easier to talk to older people and employees who were on duty (possibly because they present "moving targets" less?). My biggest trouble was with keeping a conversation interesting once started. Anyone have some advice for the future?
My most interesting convo was with an old man named Ed. He was a greeter at a store I walked into at night. It was pretty much empty and he looked like he could use something to do. The thing I love about talking to seniors is that they have so many stories to share. He told me of his college days and the time he met the world's tallest man (at the time). Toward the end of our convo he even pointed me in the direction of an attractive co-worker of his. What a guy.
I never did get a chance to use that line (How have you been!?!?). I never really saw anyone my age and it seems like it would be weird saying that to someone much older. I'll definitely use it in the next assignment.
Finished. Improvements? I could probably have talked to more girls...
But thats what next week is for isn't it? Since i won't be on tomorrow as i will be hitting the clubs i have just done the reading for tomorrow now. And hopefully i can getthe dice rolling tomorrow night.
Week 3 is actually the furthest i have got in Bootcamp. But i have come leaps and bounds since the last time i did it, and should be able to complete this task with a little bit of effort.
Somethings to consider, listed mainly to psyche myself up:
Confidence is key. Have a bit of self-belief, they fart and burp like you! Leave that desperation at home, and eliminate any ideas and thoughts of you two being an item.
Stop caring what they think. You actually increase the chances of not bringing them into your life if you start caring what impressions your making/what image they might have made of you. Yes you are DECREASING your chances! They actually don't want you to care, because they are the self absorbed insecure ones worried about what impression they are making. Thats their role. You doing their role is unattractive and damaging. Its bice guy, afc and feminine. :nono:
But thats what next week is for isn't it? Since i won't be on tomorrow as i will be hitting the clubs i have just done the reading for tomorrow now. And hopefully i can getthe dice rolling tomorrow night.
Week 3 is actually the furthest i have got in Bootcamp. But i have come leaps and bounds since the last time i did it, and should be able to complete this task with a little bit of effort.
Somethings to consider, listed mainly to psyche myself up:
Confidence is key. Have a bit of self-belief, they fart and burp like you! Leave that desperation at home, and eliminate any ideas and thoughts of you two being an item.
Stop caring what they think. You actually increase the chances of not bringing them into your life if you start caring what impressions your making/what image they might have made of you. Yes you are DECREASING your chances! They actually don't want you to care, because they are the self absorbed insecure ones worried about what impression they are making. Thats their role. You doing their role is unattractive and damaging. Its bice guy, afc and feminine. :nono:
Sir Shinra
Don Juan
Okay, a little bit late with my field notes. My schedule is very packed, but vacation starts next week so I can own this ****.
Goal complete. 10/10 conversations achieved. More than half of them were with attractive (or at least cute) females. Here are some notable moments
NOTE: Unless I mention otherwise, all people I intract with in my field notes are Korean.
I talked to a middle-aged guy on the train, going back and forth with broken English/Korean. Actually ran into the guy again this morning, though we didn't say much.
Went to the club with one of my coworkers. At the time, my voice was completely gone, so all the interactions I had were completely nonverbal (lots of hand signals and spelling out characters
on my palm. I initiated one conversation with a guy at the bar.
**I had a great night. I danced back and forth between three different women, and ran up making out with one of them. No words or even hand signals were exchanged. Just rythm, sexual tension, and alchohol.
Unfortunately, just seconds into the encounter, this Korean guy comes out of nowhere and ****blocks me, effectively ending my night. And no, she didn't go anywhere with him (it was obvious that she found him quite repulsive, but he kept persisting anyway. She just had to deal with it. That's how the culture is here.
On Saturday evening, I got lost on my weekend run, and asked a random girl for directions. She ended up walking me back to her neighborhood, where I promptly ditched her in order to finish my room (ADVICE: was this a good idea? I mean, I'm supposed to UNDERstay my welcome, right?). Of course, I did get her number first. I sent her a text and recieved one back, but no word since.
Saturday night I went to a different club in another neighborhood. the atmosphere was so different. Every girl in the club, no matter how attractive, had their ***** shields up to the max. Nobody would talk to or look at me for more than a quarter of a second. After 3 hours of dancing with myself, I felt terrible and just had to leave. I was so on the previous night. What happened?
A few nights later I'm on the train home and this older guy sits down next to me and starts speaking Japanese. I took Japanese in college so I jumped at the oppurtunity to practice my language. I gave the guy my number and he gave me an invitation to go drinking soju one night.
The next night, I talk to a moderately cute girl (but with braces) and her bf on the train. Got both their numbers.
The night after that, I'm on the train home (get the pattern here?) and I see some guys standing around with a guitar amp. Start a conversation that lead to discussion about our favorite metal bands and a phone number.
Final conversation of the week: I see a hot older woman on the train (Korean women age well) playing Nintendo DS (yes, women actually play video games here). I extend an invitation. I kicked her ass in Mario Kart, and as a reward I got her phone number.
So, tally for the week:
Conversations initiated: 10
Phone numbers acquired: 9
Phone numbers belonging to HBs: 6
Rejections (upon asking for phone #): 2
Women kissed: 2 (one of them was kinda thrust upon me)
Goal complete. 10/10 conversations achieved. More than half of them were with attractive (or at least cute) females. Here are some notable moments
NOTE: Unless I mention otherwise, all people I intract with in my field notes are Korean.
I talked to a middle-aged guy on the train, going back and forth with broken English/Korean. Actually ran into the guy again this morning, though we didn't say much.
Went to the club with one of my coworkers. At the time, my voice was completely gone, so all the interactions I had were completely nonverbal (lots of hand signals and spelling out characters
on my palm. I initiated one conversation with a guy at the bar.
**I had a great night. I danced back and forth between three different women, and ran up making out with one of them. No words or even hand signals were exchanged. Just rythm, sexual tension, and alchohol.
Unfortunately, just seconds into the encounter, this Korean guy comes out of nowhere and ****blocks me, effectively ending my night. And no, she didn't go anywhere with him (it was obvious that she found him quite repulsive, but he kept persisting anyway. She just had to deal with it. That's how the culture is here.
On Saturday evening, I got lost on my weekend run, and asked a random girl for directions. She ended up walking me back to her neighborhood, where I promptly ditched her in order to finish my room (ADVICE: was this a good idea? I mean, I'm supposed to UNDERstay my welcome, right?). Of course, I did get her number first. I sent her a text and recieved one back, but no word since.
Saturday night I went to a different club in another neighborhood. the atmosphere was so different. Every girl in the club, no matter how attractive, had their ***** shields up to the max. Nobody would talk to or look at me for more than a quarter of a second. After 3 hours of dancing with myself, I felt terrible and just had to leave. I was so on the previous night. What happened?
A few nights later I'm on the train home and this older guy sits down next to me and starts speaking Japanese. I took Japanese in college so I jumped at the oppurtunity to practice my language. I gave the guy my number and he gave me an invitation to go drinking soju one night.
The next night, I talk to a moderately cute girl (but with braces) and her bf on the train. Got both their numbers.
The night after that, I'm on the train home (get the pattern here?) and I see some guys standing around with a guitar amp. Start a conversation that lead to discussion about our favorite metal bands and a phone number.
Final conversation of the week: I see a hot older woman on the train (Korean women age well) playing Nintendo DS (yes, women actually play video games here). I extend an invitation. I kicked her ass in Mario Kart, and as a reward I got her phone number.
So, tally for the week:
Conversations initiated: 10
Phone numbers acquired: 9
Phone numbers belonging to HBs: 6
Rejections (upon asking for phone #): 2
Women kissed: 2 (one of them was kinda thrust upon me)
hmmm
Ok, this week was extremely difficult. I got my last conversation in at about midnight.
What I have found is that I have trouble being honest with people. I will ask them questions that I already know the answer to. Or I will suddenly draw a blank and start to lie about things.
1. I had a conversation with an old guy while Christmas shopping (talked about Christmas...obviously). This was easy for me.
2. Had a conversation with a cute girl at a party I went to. A little difficult, but she had already been talking with someone I knew so I decided to approach after he had left.
2. Had some conversations with a technician at a theater I went to. People always like to offer opinions about their job.
3. 4. I talked with 2 people from my work (whom I had never met, I went out of my way to talk to them). People aren't comfortable with me, I guess they could sense that I was having trouble.
5. 6. 7. Talked to 3 people while at a Christmas party. I wasn't feeling it either that day. It seems the larger the group of people, the harder it is for me.
8. Talked to someone while I was waiting in line for movie tickets. Not very difficult.
9. 10. I had brief conversations with 2 security guards. Since they mostly stand around all day, they seemed to like talking when approached.
Ok, this week was extremely difficult. I got my last conversation in at about midnight.
What I have found is that I have trouble being honest with people. I will ask them questions that I already know the answer to. Or I will suddenly draw a blank and start to lie about things.
1. I had a conversation with an old guy while Christmas shopping (talked about Christmas...obviously). This was easy for me.
2. Had a conversation with a cute girl at a party I went to. A little difficult, but she had already been talking with someone I knew so I decided to approach after he had left.
2. Had some conversations with a technician at a theater I went to. People always like to offer opinions about their job.
3. 4. I talked with 2 people from my work (whom I had never met, I went out of my way to talk to them). People aren't comfortable with me, I guess they could sense that I was having trouble.
5. 6. 7. Talked to 3 people while at a Christmas party. I wasn't feeling it either that day. It seems the larger the group of people, the harder it is for me.
8. Talked to someone while I was waiting in line for movie tickets. Not very difficult.
9. 10. I had brief conversations with 2 security guards. Since they mostly stand around all day, they seemed to like talking when approached.
combustiont
Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 30, 2008
- Messages
- 46
- Reaction score
- 0
Way way WAAAAAAAY late.
I didn't forget though, and in some ways, an extra half week has been killer. Needed the extra approaches - keeping the convo going is something I need to work on.
Made well over the number of convos necessary - found the elevator at the office a great place to start. It also became a challenge, lots of people don't want to talk to you on there, just give a hello and goodbye, but i'd work my way into peoples heads, make them talk, etc. Got something good going with a redhead on the elevator who was very shy and I could tell the eye contact was working great. Head down, smiling, etc... why didn't I do all this sooner?
I did a lot of talking, i'm sure I made an ass of myself in a few spots, but who cares. I feel pretty damn good. I'm approaching people, i'm talking people up and not just women - my customers, too. People have been happy with me, depend on me more, I feel like i've got some real swagger going. I'm feeling pretty good.
I didn't forget though, and in some ways, an extra half week has been killer. Needed the extra approaches - keeping the convo going is something I need to work on.
Made well over the number of convos necessary - found the elevator at the office a great place to start. It also became a challenge, lots of people don't want to talk to you on there, just give a hello and goodbye, but i'd work my way into peoples heads, make them talk, etc. Got something good going with a redhead on the elevator who was very shy and I could tell the eye contact was working great. Head down, smiling, etc... why didn't I do all this sooner?
I did a lot of talking, i'm sure I made an ass of myself in a few spots, but who cares. I feel pretty damn good. I'm approaching people, i'm talking people up and not just women - my customers, too. People have been happy with me, depend on me more, I feel like i've got some real swagger going. I'm feeling pretty good.
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.