Will you ever settle?

[Young OG]

I will settle if I find the right girl that has what I'm looking for. But, I will not marry her. I'm fine with living with a woman. I already have a kid and had a vasectomy. I dont want more kids. Until I find her, I'm just going to keep smashing women along the way.

Guys on here have different goals when it comes to women. Some want to be players for life and some want to settle. It's your life, so figure out what you want.

 

[zekko]

Guys on here have different goals when it comes to women. Some want to be players for life and some want to settle.

Note that these guys are looking for two different kinds of women.

 

[BeExcellent]

Advice from the old lady:

I always say pick from those who show interest in you personally through their actions. And do everything you can within reason to have a broad appeal to the opposite sex (this gives you the most options). That's what I do as far as men go. I pick from the men who show interest. It's silly to go chasing after people who aren't interested. Keep yourself up and you'll have choices. Choose from those choices someone who is a good fit. I don't consider that settling, but I will say I make the conscious effort to keep myself such that I retain a broad appeal. At almost 50 I still attract men ranging in age from about 28 to upwards of 80. Most men who approach me are in their 30s to 60s. And it's a pretty even distribution. I prefer older men for any number of reasons, but mostly due to the fact that guys in their 30s and early 40s may still want children one day. That's not a desire I can meet and nor would I want to be raising babies at my age. I don't settle, but I also only choose from those who show interest. And I'm perfectly happy by myself too, so I don't feel any real pressure to be in a relationship for the sake of being in a relationship.

Slightly off topic comments about ethnic versus Caucasian women:

There are fair Caucasian women who age well. Jennifer Anniston and Nicole Kidman are good examples. So are Christy Brinkley and Claudia Shiffer. The key thing as a fair skinned person is to avoid the sun and start avoiding the sun very early in life. I quit tanning period at age 20 because a girl I knew who tanned, laid out in the sun and so forth got a skin cancer diagnosis very young, at 21. Seeing that scared me into avoiding the sun. I am regularly pegged as 15 years younger than I am and this is a big factor IMO. I also think that getting enough sleep and wearing very little make up helps the skin retain its youth better...and there are genetics of course at play as well too. My grandmother died at 97. She never grayed, and she always had supple skin and was never ever overweight. She looked in her early 70's when she died.

There are many things people do to retain a youthful appearance as long as possible. There is Botox, there are peels and so forth, there is plastic surgery for those who can afford it, and many affluent people make use of these things. I'd say almost without exception celebrities do stuff like that. Everything from coloring one's hair to teeth whitening to body sculpting. And if the result is natural looking nobody is going to know what enhancements are being utilized.

But avoiding smoking, excessive drinking and partying, and drugs are key. Getting enough sleep, eating well and drinking enough water and exercising are all things that help too.

Two people can be blessed with the same great looks in youth. But lifestyle choices over time will determine who still looks great as they get to middle age and beyond.

Screen for women who are making wise lifestyle choices in their youth. Those are the women who will age the best, genetics help, but I've seen many a beautiful person ruin their genetic blessings over time by failing to live a healthy lifestyle. Girls on the champagne, cigarette and French fries diet who stay out and party all night are not going to look great in 25 years.

I've seen lots of those girls through being in the nightlife business. It doesn't age well.

 

[RangerMIke]

You know at times I think that I'll settle for less than I can get with women, especially when I hit a period where the women I date are all pulling back and need to find new ones. This happened to me last year. Two I were causally dating drifted off to other dudes that were willing to commit to exclusivity, and the 3rd found some kind of strange religion... and started hanging out with people with 'ideas' that was making dating her no fun. I went for about 4 weeks where everything was coming up dry.... and started to think, maybe I need to settle for less than I can get....

But what I always do when this sh!t happens, because it happens to ALL of us at some point, is double down on what I can get... so instead of settling, I started shooting for the stars, I was hitting up super hot chicks, I'd walk into a party find the best looking women in the group and just go for it, even if I knew I had little chance because they weren't giving me body language buying signals. I just kept going after what I wanted. And I was EPIC-ALLY shot down... over and over again. Blue balls were settling in, it would have been easy to just get what I could, but I did not give in. None of this really helped me, it just wasn't working... I was getting numbers and making dates, but was getting cancels and flakes... all predictable when you approach chicks that really aren't interested in you.

But what this does is keep you in the proper mind-set. You just have to realize that things like this happen at times. Because all of the sudden everything will turn around, but it won't if you just stop trying... chicks that had drifted off in the past 'reach out', then you are back in the swing of things. With me, two that I really liked came back! I guess the dudes that they had been trying to make things work with didn't pan out.

It's the same with my body... the older I get the harder and more painful it is to work out... but I know that if I start to slip back, I'll start falling apart. Arthritis will set in, my muscle tone will slip... and it just keeps getting easier and easy to become a slob. You start settling for women when you know you can do better, the same thing happens.