Wicked awful experience. Worried it's gonna happen again

[rickyo]

So, hell, let me lay it out. This is wicked painful for me to say this. I may have ****ed up. Bad.

First approach. Ever.

College. Found girl at party. Seems interested. Follow her to friends dorm room. Start talking. Attempt some physical contact while flirting (brush my hand across her face). She says she has girlfriend. We go out for a cig.

We start talking. Says she wants to be my friend. Shakes my hand, we part ways.

Next day, she says I cornered her in the cafeteria next day. Big dude, friend of hers, screams at me to leave.

So ashamed, embarrassed, I ****in drop out of college. Left for a myriad of other reasons, but obviously I would never would live it down on that campus.

Two years later, about to enter into college again. Been living as a scared AFC ever since. So afraid. Can't approach girls. Desperate. Lonely.

Is this normal? Does this happen? Do girls typically lie about you? If they do, what the **** are you supposed to do? So much power. I feel so meek. Meager. Castrated.

I need to change. I'd want to employ some Don Juanage, but I can't. I haven't been able to work up a shred of confidence since.

Help. Oh, for ****'s sake, help.

 

[irocknike23]

Wait your not telling the full story(its ok we dont judge)

You cornered her in the cafeteria? How and why?

and why didnt you leave on the first attempt? most girls dont just scream right away unless their like crazy or an ex-rape victim or something.
EDIT: oh her friend yelled at you to leave? once again why didnt you leave on first attempt...on that note most girls dont panic for help to their friends unless their one of the ones i mentioned in the upper lines


on that note get your ass back in school. believe it or not its more important than girls.

 

[rickyo]

No, she claimed I cornered her the previous evening. I didn't.

edit: The following day, after the party, I met her in the cafeteria. Sat down next to her, asked her what was up. Didn't really talk to me. Second later big dude grips my shoulder, screams at me to leave. I try to explain to them I didn't ****ing corner her, she claimed otherwise. I'm quickly considered a rapist on campus.


We left outside for a cig, she shook my hand. Next day, that happened. She lied about me.

 

[irocknike23]

No, she claimed I cornered her the previous evening. I didn't. We left outside for a cig, she shook my hand. Next day, that happened.

still lost. she claimed your cornered her and next day day she sees you and her friend yells at you? still dont make sense.

 

[rickyo]

edited post

 

[irocknike23]

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

lol like i said your not telling the whole story its ok...


anyways just go back to school. and learn from your mistakes. besides colleges are huge its impossible to randomly find people.

and on top of that most people dont remember stuff more than 6 months ago

 

[Robert28]

im sorry but i had to laugh when she told you she had a girlfriend.haha that woulda been it for me right there.

 

[rickyo]

Alright, look, that's the whole story.

I hit on her the previous evening. I brushed my hand across her face, trying to win her over with some conversation. We were in the hallway of the dorm room. People were coming in and out of the hallway. My conversation failed (I don't think I was saying anything rude to her), and she said she had a girlfriend. Took a cig out of her pocketbook, asked to smoke one with her. I did.

She asked if we could still be friends thereafter. I shook her hand. We parted ways after the butt.

Next day I see her in the cafeteria. At the table, after the big dude was screaming at me after she said I cornered her, I kept trying to reason that I didn't. No one believed me.

Everyone on campus began to ignore me. It happened. That's it. I leave, can't deal with being considered a ****ing rapist when I'm not.

Since then, AFC. Can't build up a shred of confidence.

Basically, all I've learned is that any girl can say anything about you thereafter. She could've said I raped her. I could've gone to jail.

How the **** are you supposed to deal with that? Knowing that you can go to jail with an INTERACTION with a girl? How can you risk it like that? How can you prevent that from happening?

 

[irocknike23]

Alright, look, that's the whole story.

I hit on her the previous evening. I brushed my hand across her face, trying to win her over with some conversation. We were in the hallway of the dorm room. People were coming in and out of the hallway. My conversation failed (I don't think I was saying anything rude to her), and she said she had a girlfriend. Took a cig out of her pocketbook, asked to smoke one with her. I did.

She asked if we could still be friends thereafter. I shook her hand. We parted ways after the butt.

Next day I see her in the cafeteria. At the table, after the big dude was screaming at me after she said I cornered her, I kept trying to reason that I didn't. No one believed me.

Everyone on campus began to ignore me. It happened. That's it. I leave, can't deal with being considered a ****ing rapist when I'm not.

Since then, AFC. Can't build up a shred of confidence.

Basically, all I've learned is that any girl can say anything about you thereafter. She could've said I raped her. I could've gone to jail.

How the **** are you supposed to deal with that? Knowing that you can go to jail with an INTERACTION with a girl? How can you risk it like that? How can you prevent that from happening?

so you basically did nothing and she made false claims? happens i guess


just go to a different school

 

[rickyo]

Well, I mean, what the ****? That was my only goddamn approach, but ANY chick can do that! I'm asking, like, what the hell am I supposed to do if it happens again? Go to ANOTHER school? Go to jail? Like, ****!

Basically, I haven't been able to muster an approach since. Getting lied about from a girl is the WORST position I have ever been in in my life. I can't do that again, I can't go through that entire situation. Has anyone ever been in the same boat?

 

[irocknike23]

Well, I mean, what the ****? That was my only goddamn approach, but ANY chick can do that! I'm asking, like, what the hell am I supposed to do if it happens again? Go to ANOTHER school? Go to jail? Like, ****!

Basically, I haven't been able to muster an approach since. Getting lied about from a girl is the WORST position I have ever been in in my life. I can't do that again, I can't go through that entire situation. Has anyone ever been in the same boat?

ok let me ask you this. if things didn't click at all the previous night why did u sit with her in the cafeteria? if i were u i would want nothing to do with her.


and most girls aren't like that so calm down. this is actually the first time i heard of something like this happening.

yes girls can make false acclaims but you usually have to screw them over hard or really mess with them to do that, i know because i have to go to to court to testify for my innocent teammate because a girl pressed assault charges on him when he didn't lay a hand on her and i was there anyways..thats besides the point

like i said most girls don't do things like this.

this story is very strange...you did nothing wrong but she freaks out the next day and makes false accusations. maybe she was ill in the head you don't know...or maybe she really was a ex-rape victim who knows..

 

[Aaron B]

assuming the story in the OP is true, i'd recommend that you see a therapist

 

[rickyo]

Dude I have. I have, I have, I have. It's the whole story - please believe me. Is it because it's that ****ed up that I should continue therapy for this? They haven't helped.

 

[irocknike23]

Dude I have. I have, I have, I have. It's the whole story - please believe me. Is it because it's that ****ed up that I should continue therapy for this? They haven't helped.

ok let me ask you this. if things didn't click at all the previous night why did u sit with her in the cafeteria the next day?

 

[rickyo]

Dude, I dunno. Is that a huge no? I mean I got rejected, but I was still trying to learn some decent social interaction. She said she wanted to be friends, I didn't have any opportunities going at the moment. I was just saying hi.

 

[Aaron B]

it seems that this event has scarred you emotionally

 

[irocknike23]

Dude, I dunno. Is that a huge no? I mean I got rejected, but I was still trying to learn some decent social interaction. She said she wanted to be friends, I didn't have any opportunities going at the moment. I was just saying hi.

yes its a big no and now you know....


a girl rejects you there should be no reason for coming back to her. makes you look weak and desperate

 

[crazyboy]

If everything you said was true. Then you should defended yourself and then left. Obviously this woman was not interested, she told you wanted as friend and even told you had a girlfriend. obviously that guy was her bf and she trying to cover her ass. No not all women just dont go out scream at you and make false claim just because. You should left her alone when she rejected you and move on. Also next time somebody accuse you of something and some dude yells at you need man up and defend yourself. If any dude put his hands on me there would be a problem, so you should defended yourself better than move on.

People would have forgotten about it and all you have to do was avoid that small group out the thousand on a college campus. Man you made a mountain of a mole hill.

 

[Masculinity]

So, hell, let me lay it out. This is wicked painful for me to say this. I may have ****ed up. Bad.

First approach. Ever.

College. Found girl at party. Seems interested. Follow her to friends dorm room. Start talking. Attempt some physical contact while flirting (brush my hand across her face). She says she has girlfriend. We go out for a cig.

We start talking. Says she wants to be my friend. Shakes my hand, we part ways.

Next day, she says I cornered her in the cafeteria next day. Big dude, friend of hers, screams at me to leave.

So ashamed, embarrassed, I ****in drop out of college. Left for a myriad of other reasons, but obviously I would never would live it down on that campus.

Two years later, about to enter into college again. Been living as a scared AFC ever since. So afraid. Can't approach girls. Desperate. Lonely.

Is this normal? Does this happen? Do girls typically lie about you? If they do, what the **** are you supposed to do? So much power. I feel so meek. Meager. Castrated.

I need to change. I'd want to employ some Don Juanage, but I can't. I haven't been able to work up a shred of confidence since.

Help. Oh, for ****'s sake, help.

Hey man, do you happen to be in Southern California? Some guys and I get together once a week or every two weeks, hangout, and work on our games.

You sound like you could use some help!

 

[irocknike23]

Also next time somebody accuse you of something and some dude yells at you need man up and defend yourself. If any dude put his hands on me there would be a problem, so you should defended yourself better than move on.

AMEN!

no one should put hands on you when you done nothing wrong.