Why you shouldn't take her cheating personally

logicallefty

Moderator
Joined
Apr 26, 2006
Messages
6,072
Reaction score
5,254
Age
50
Location
Northeast Florida, USA
I've been cheated on once for sure that I know of. (1 x woman cheating w/ 3 x guys confirmed). My defense against it now is to WATCH THE SIGNS like a mother fvcking hawk looking through an electron microscope. And abort the relationship before she gets a chance to cheat, even if my IL is high. I agree that the chance of a woman cheating is much higher than the chance that she won't.
 

sazc

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 23, 2016
Messages
4,511
Reaction score
3,435
In all honesty, I was just stating observations. I find it utterly fascinating when I see contradictory information posted on the site. Usually it is posted in a manner where it is a bit of info here and the contradictory info somewhere else, so it doesn't get immediately tied as contradictory.

For the record, I agree that females like attention. If someone I was dating soft nexted me because of a disagreement, to me that would signal lack of interest and, when they caled in 4-6 days, it would strike me that they feel as if emotional abandonment was okay to do inside of a relationship. That would be a big no bueno for me. I would communicate about it and expect it to never happen again and, if it did, I would nicely end the relationship. Caveat - I'm not disrespectful or ugly when i disagree. If I was soft nexted because we disagreed on something, that's not someone I want to emotionally invest in.

FWIW, I'm quite literally that female that had a single one night stand, felt repulsed by stranger sex, and never did it again. lol, one day I looked around at my girlfriends and they were all hookin up so I figured, why not try it? Stranger sex...ew! Nevah again!

In terms of cheating, it seems like a chicken and egg situation...which came first, her feelings that he wasnt paying enough attention to her, or her feelings of low IL towards him? You can never really know. I find cheating to be low class. If you're going to cheat, leave first. Why create a mess and hurt people.

I've been cheated on 2x that I know of. It's their baggage and their character flaws. I didnt take it personally.
 
Last edited:

speed dawg

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 9, 2006
Messages
4,798
Reaction score
1,241
Location
The Dirty South
In terms of cheating, it seems like a chicken and egg situation...which came first, her feelings that he wasnt paying enough attention to her, or her feelings of low IL towards him? You can never really know. I find cheating to be low class. If you're going to cheat, leave first. Why create a mess and hurt people.

I've been cheated on 2x that I know of. It's their baggage and their character flaws. I didnt take it personally.
There is always a lesson to learn. While I agree that the cheater has baggage and flaws, you are selling yourself short to not look in the mirror and try to assess what it was in YOU that drove them away. Sometimes you can help it, sometimes you can't, but it's never a bad idea to know about it and accept/improve it, depending on what it is.
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,914
Reaction score
12,125
Location
DFW, TX
There is always a lesson to learn. While I agree that the cheater has baggage and flaws, you are selling yourself short to not look in the mirror and try to assess what it was in YOU that drove them away. Sometimes you can help it, sometimes you can't, but it's never a bad idea to know about it and accept/improve it, depending on what it is.
It could be their character. I knew a wife who was cheating with my brother. My brother is a normal everyday dude. The husband was a former US Army Special Forces guy put in years of service, a trained killer, an impeccable body, supposedly hung like a horse, also after the military his driven and motivated personality helped him become a high powered sales guy making $200+K per year! The guy took care of his wife and just bought her a range rover.

She cheated on husband because he was so MUCH that she cheated on him with regular folks to BEAT HIM. There was nothing wrong with him, nothing wrong with his body, nothing wrong with his $, nothing wrong with his cawk, it was HER. She had to feel like she was winning over this beast of a man.

Anyway he showed up ready to kill veins popped and all, but my brothers wife stepped in the way and explained she knows a bunch of folks in his neighborhood and he will disappear if anything happens to her husband.

So the affair went on for a few more weeks, while they laughed at the hi powered husband. He got tired of it, and did a simple move that broke one of my brothers ribs, and told him to take his ass home. The wife was okay with that, because
it served her husband right...
 

Desra Lyons

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 23, 2017
Messages
13
Reaction score
1
We agree to disagree on this one.

I have always seen in my time that if she values you she wouldn't dare do anything that would jeopardize getting dumped by you.
If it's one thing I learned about cheating women it's the lower the chance of them getting caught ,the higher the chance that they'll do it. They are better at hiding it , also men are more likely to look you in your face and **** your girlfriend behind your back , you got the loyal side piece female too ,but not like guys are. You'll never know a thing .
 

stovepipe

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 12, 2017
Messages
979
Reaction score
1,089
There is always a lesson to learn. While I agree that the cheater has baggage and flaws, you are selling yourself short to not look in the mirror and try to assess what it was in YOU that drove them away. Sometimes you can help it, sometimes you can't, but it's never a bad idea to know about it and accept/improve it, depending on what it is.
Whether the problem is us or not, cheating is never justified. All it does is cause unnecessary drama and major mental strain on the person being cheated on. To top it off, passing a possible STD or STI to your partner. The real problem is today's society and the utter lack of respect for one another. Having respect for yourself and others, would be leaving the person first, then sticking your hotdog in another bun . Its like a majority of humanity these days is programmed to chit on one another. The older I get, the less trustworthy humans are becoming.
 
Top