Why yesterday was the worst and best day of my life

[GaryNas]

Very fast summary:

Back in August my girlfriend of 7 years broke up with me. We decided to keep talking and going out, but with no sexual interactions.

Over the past 6 months we stayed close, talking about our feelings, etc. I started dating someone a few weeks ago and was completely honest with her about it. Yesterday I deviously went into her email for some reason and found out she's been sending masturbation pictures of herself to her boss. Long story short, she's been sleeping with her married boss (with kids), and 20 years older than her, for the past few months. So I've been pretty numb for the past 24 hours.

It's hard to articulate this situation, or how I feel over the Internet, but this is completely devistating to me. However, at the same time I feel relieved. Our relationship, with all its ups and downs, is finally over. I told her I no longer respect her, or trust her and that I can never speak with her again. I said I'll always love her, but I can never be with her again.

I'm scared ****less about the unknown future, but I'm also looking forward to it. After I give myself a few days for this to sink in I plan to change many aspects of my life... I'm not sure exactly what yet, but it will all come.

Anyway, no point to this story really, but thanks for reading.

 

[justsomeguy1984]

This is why the DJ bible says not to get too close with one girl---you end up getting your heart broken (or finding out she's some weirdo who sends masturbation pics of herself to some horny old man LOL)

 

[TheInfamousCBear]

I dont see why you should be so upset...Yall were already broken up, the only difference is she moved on and you didnt...If you ahd another girl, you shouldnt of wasted any energy on her...Thats what happens when you dont let go of something thats over...

 

[Skweints]

The man was in a 7 year freaking relationship... and you can't understand why he's upset? If I was attached to something for 7 years, and then found out she was cheating on me with some old nasty bastard, I'd be a little devistated too. You ever get comfortable with something so much that you feel so out of place without it? The only way to deal with that is to get used to change.

Anyways, hey man, it's time to move on to bigger and better things. Everything is gonna start off slow, but once the momentum builds up, things will be flying by so damn fast, you'll look back and think to yourself "Wow... I was upset over that!?"

 

[GaryNas]

Originally posted by justsomeguy1984
This is why the DJ bible says not to get too close with one girl---you end up getting your heart broken (or finding out she's some weirdo who sends masturbation pics of herself to some horny old man LOL)

DJ Bible is wrong in this case. If you never experience love, at least once, then you haven't lived life. Even though it hurts like hell, I would do it all over agian.

 

[TheInfamousCBear]

Originally posted by Skweints
The man was in a 7 year freaking relationship... and you can't understand why he's upset? If I was attached to something for 7 years, and then found out she was cheating on me with some old nasty bastard, I'd be a little devistated too. You ever get comfortable with something so much that you feel so out of place without it? The only way to deal with that is to get used to change.

He was already broken up with her, he should of moved on then and left her alone, cause she sure did...lol...I dont understand why people who are in an LTR for more than 5 years just dont go ahead and get married, but then again that just lil ole me...

 

[frivolousz21]

Im sorry man!

I hope ur back on ur feet quickly!

yea why werent u married?

 

[GaryNas]

Originally posted by TheInfamousCBear
He was already broken up with her, he should of moved on then and left her alone, cause she sure did...lol...

I didn't know she did though, and she kept saying how she still loved me and we'll be able to work it out. We were still really close, which I believe is understandable. It's very true that we weren't going out when she started doing this, but like I said we were still close and both stated that we weren't seeing other people and wanted to concentrate on us.

Originally posted by frivolousz21
Im sorry man!

I hope ur back on ur feet quickly!

yea why werent u married?

We're still young and in school. We talked about getting married next year after we graduated, but that's not going to happen now.

 

[TheInfamousCBear]

Originally posted by GaryNas
I didn't know she did though, and she kept saying how she still loved me and we'll be able to work it out. We were still really close, which I believe is understandable. It's very true that we weren't going out when she started doing this, but like I said we were still close and both stated that we weren't seeing other people and wanted to concentrate on us.

Oh sh1t, she lied to you...Yeah, I would be mad too, but you should of let go though...If you dont know, now you know...

 

[frivolousz21]

one day you will be emotionally de-attached from her..and realize where you made the mistakes..thats expierence..and you will make the next time around a million times better!!!!!!

 

[Joe The Homophobe]

Originally posted by GaryNas
DJ Bible is wrong in this case. If you never experience love, at least once, then you haven't lived life. Even though it hurts like hell, I would do it all over agian.

Every man gets hurt by/because of a woman at least once in his life. Think of it like falling off a bike, it happens to everyone. Even the toughest men around get hurt because of women, after all human beings are emotional creatures.

There is only one way to forget the pain a woman causes. It aint done by drinking beer, it is done by GETTING A NEW WOMAN!

Don't feel bad because of your past girl, get yourself a new one and she will make you forget.

 

[dietzcoi]

This is what is wrong with having a 7 year LTR beginning when you are only 18.

Nobody else see a problem with this?

He was totally AFC "talking about feelings" and such that she got rid of him and started having an exciting and dangerous affair with an old bastard like me!

Don't let this happen again!

Dietzcoi

 

[cave dweller]

drop her.....

Gary,

Get out there and find a new one.

Break off all contact with your EX ( go cold turkey) and move on.

cave dweller

 

[Sart]

DETZCOI

I am one of the old bastarrds that does this to young dudes. Thing is, we aren't at fault, these chicks have free will, it isnt like we force it. We may manipulate and give a shove here and there, but hey, ITS ALL FAIR GAME.

As for the original poster, I think you showed true maturity by being pisssed with your ex, not her boss. Too many men would go after the other guy when, in reality, they should shake his hand and thank him.

Also, as someone said, we ALL get the shyte kicked out of us at least once, well, kind of anyway.

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by Skweints
The man was in a 7 year freaking relationship... and you can't understand why he's upset? If I was attached to something for 7 years, and then found out she was cheating on me with some old nasty bastard, I'd be a little devistated too. You ever get comfortable with something so much that you feel so out of place without it? The only way to deal with that is to get used to change.

Anyways, hey man, it's time to move on to bigger and better things. Everything is gonna start off slow, but once the momentum builds up, things will be flying by so damn fast, you'll look back and think to yourself "Wow... I was upset over that!?"

It's been 6 months. I'm not saying he should forget, but it shouldn't ruin his life to find out that she's jilling off for her boss.

Originally posted by GaryNas
DJ Bible is wrong in this case. If you never experience love, at least once, then you haven't lived life. Even though it hurts like hell, I would do it all over agian.

"Love" or no "love", you can't allow yourself to be a victim of bullsh!t. Too often, the word "love" is used to try to excuse your allowing yourself to become a victim. If you want to be a victim of "love" for the rest of your life, no matter how much it sucks, then you go right ahead. I guess there's some "nobility" in suffering for "love".

Time to move on.

 

[Stu951]

Seven years hurts my man, I can feel you definately! So sad it had to come to such a horrific ending too!

Take care dude. You were the better person by far.

 

[jprjrjr]

I had a similar situation, (no masturbation pics lol), but a seven year relationship that blew up in my face with in a month. It hurts really bad for awhile, but eventually you will become more and more used to being without her. It does go back to normal, just hang in there.