Why would a girl with a boyfriend flirt, want to "get together" but still mention BF?

[Alex-The-Iceman]

There's this girl in my college class that I caught repeatedly OBVIOUSLY checking me out, staring and wanting me to catch her. I looked her up on Facebook and found out she is in a relationship, so I just dropped it. However, she kept doing it and came and hung around my desk so that we could meet - completely her initiative. We've talked a couple of times since then, and she does mention her boyfriend (ie. my boyfriend bought Assassin's Creed, my boyfriend can bench 140 pounds) but she's still been trying to talk to me, making excuses for me to talk to her and "help her" with things on her project that she can easily just do on her own - it's just an excuse... she wrote her e-mail down on a piece of paper and gave it to me. Recently, she's been wearing these low-cut shirts that show off her ****. I let her bust me looking at her breasts once so she knows I find her sexually attractive. I e-mailed her asking if she was planning on going to school over the weekend to work and she said "I wasn't planning on it, why? Want to get together?"

Why would a girl in a relationship be doing all this, AND be alright with getting together knowing full-well that there is SOMETHING there between us sexually. I'm undecided on whether she is a flirt and it is for attention, or she "is resisting verbally/physically BUT not walking away. done. she wants you to persist hardcore" and it's her anti-slut defense, as mentioned in this linked thread near the bottom, where she wants to feel like I'M the one who seduced her and it's not her fault.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=182586

 

[VladPatton]

Tell her "too bad you've got a bf, I would of loved to hang out with you, but..oh well!" and let her come to you one day that she broke up with him. Once she gets rid of him it's game on.

140 lbs on bench press? My god, I curl 115 for reps. *smh*

 

[LandingWood]

140 a Bench?!?!?!?!? LMFAO

 

[user name]

140 a Bench?!?!?!?!? LMFAO

I don't see what's so funny about that.

140 lbs (not including the 20kg bar) is perfectly respectable for a college kid.

At my peak (18-20) I was benching 220 lbs but that included the 20kg bar.

:cheer: :box:

 

[LandingWood]

I don't see what's so funny about that.

140 lbs (not including the 20kg bar) is perfectly respectable for a college kid.

At my peak (18-20) I was benching 220 lbs but that included the 20kg bar.

:cheer: :box:

I was benching 140 in middle school and got clowned on. That's just sad.

 

[user name]

I was benching 140 in middle school and got clowned on. That's just sad.

I just use mainly bodyweight now. Styled on a prison routine.

 

[NewJack]

She is exploring her sexual power over men. Having her cake and eating it too.

There is a wild feeling of abandon in what she is doing, it feels great to be so desired, such a focal point for loving attention. It is a really invigorating and "impassionating" thing for women to experience this, I believe.

It isn't evil or soulless, as guys who have been scorched assert. Its just not plain-dealing and upright honesty. We get the same feeling when we are spinning plates, we're on the top of the world, but we're not really being 100% square with folks.

You can proceed however you want, knowing that you are unlikely to find a stable bond that gets you laid regularly. These fly-by-night missions are not how real relationships form, its mostly flaking, disintegration, and experimentation with an occasional 3-week booty call as the result. Thats my jaded and not completely fully informed opinion!

 

[Maximus Rex]

Recently, she's been wearing these low-cut shirts that show off her t*tties. I let her bust me looking at her breasts once so she knows I find her sexually attractive. I e-mailed her asking if she was planning on going to school over the weekend to work and she said "I wasn't planning on it, why? Want to get together?"

She's an attention wh*re and she's trying to her attention fix from you. When you she her with her titties out, hit her with the bunker buster neg.

Why would a girl in a relationship be doing all this, AND be alright with getting together knowing full-well that there is SOMETHING there between us sexually.

The following come from "The Mystery Method," By Mystery page 36

Nine times out of ten, when a woman says, " I have a boyfriend," what this translates to is, "You just telegraphed too much interest."

It has nothing to do with whether she actually has a boyfriend. In fact if she is attracted to you, she will often deliberately hide the boyfriend from you until after you have had sex with her.

Whether she mentions him or not in no way proves that he actually exists-only that she had a motive to mention him.

1) Though she doesn't have a boyfriend, she's not attracted to you or you miscalibrated your escalation.

2) She DOES have a boyfriend and, given her current options, she has chosen to stick with that relationship.

3) She DOES have a boyfriend and is willing to sleep with you but wants to make sure that you understand her situation first. She wants DISCRETION and understanding. And though she might be available to you for sex, she NOT immediately available for more of a commitment.

4) She DOES have a boyfriend and she IS willing to cheat on him (they often are if your game is tight,) but she doesn't want to feel guilty about it. This is her RATIONALIZATION process at work. As long as she mentions the boyfriend BEFORE sleeping with you, she can rationalize to herself that it was YOUR FAULT. Sure, she might regret it later, but that won't necessarily stop her from cheating.

5) She DOESN'T have a boyfriend and she IS attracted to you; she just doesn't want to look like a loser who can't get a man. Most hot women have orbiters anyway: nice guys who pose as their friends but secretly want to sleep with them. Since the word "boyfriend," can have so many different meanings, she is thinking of one of her orbitors as a "place keeper."

THE BOTTOM LINE IS, DON'T ASK ABOUT HER BOYFRIEND AND DON'T APPEAR FAZED IF SHE MENTIONS HIM. HE MAY NOT EVEN EXIST. JUST TAKE AS AN INSTANCE OF LACK OF INTEREST CAUSED BY YOU TELEGRAPHING TOO MUCH INTEREST FAR TOO SOON.

Given the situation that you described, I'm willing to bet that #3 and 4 may apply to you.

I'm undecided on whether she is a flirt and it is for attention,

Oh, she's DEFINITELY the ^^^^ my dude. In my opinion you should play this straight and don't give into her attention whoring. You should make her work for every thing that she gets from you, especially time and attention. By weary of the fact she does have a "boyfriend," and dangers that come from messing with chicks in relationships, other than that, when if you decide to f*ck with her and take her out, by in control and tell her to accompany you to whatever activity you're about to engage in. Good luck.

 

[Lotus Effect]

3) She DOES have a boyfriend and is willing to sleep with you but wants to make sure that you understand her situation first. She wants DISCRETION and understanding. And though she might be available to you for sex, she NOT immediately available for more of a commitment.

4) She DOES have a boyfriend and she IS willing to cheat on him (they often are if your game is tight,) but she doesn't want to feel guilty about it. This is her RATIONALIZATION process at work. As long as she mentions the boyfriend BEFORE sleeping with you, she can rationalize to herself that it was YOUR FAULT. Sure, she might regret it later, but that won't necessarily stop her from cheating.

Given the situation that you described, I'm willing to bet that #3 and 4 may apply to you.

Spot on!

The setback in this situation is your own feelings though. You are going to be the "rebound".

She is going to use you to see which is best for her, her relationship, or moving on to something better (being single/with you/any other dude)

So, being the rebound, if you start to develop some feelings for her, you might get hurt. It is ok to f**k her. This is life. But only do it if you are 100% sure that you are not going to be emotionally involved with her, 'cause if that happens, you might be heading for a bumpy ride.

The tip is, how can you trust a girl to be in a relationship with you, if she was cheating on her boyfriend with you on the first place?

Have a good one!

 

[devilkingx2]

girl sounds like a slut, whatever you do don't even consider seriously dating her(this will be her with other guys while you two date, and if you get the lay, that's what she'll be doing with other guys who are decent with women while you date).

she might just be trolling for attention, or she might be a slut who walks the walk, its hard to say.

be wary of having your ass kicked by her boyfriend(who benches 140 apparantly... I've got a 16 year old friend who is approaching that so you might not have to worry unless he brings a gun)

 

[In2theGame]

140 a Bench?!?!?!?!? LMFAO

lol