Female perspective:
I don’t think it’s narcissistic jerks that we are attracted to.
Men who are not afraid to have boundaries and express what they want from her are more attractive to us than some guy playing the ‘nice guy‘ card. I put that in italics because the ‘nice guy’ isn’t really that nice, he’s just playing nice to get sex which most women see right through. These are the guys who then do a 180 and turn into pigs when they don’t get what they want after being so ‘nice’ to us. Tale as old as time. All of my female friends have a story. I literally had a guy text me that I was a cold bit*h after a few dates. Why? Because I didn’t want to blow him in his car after he took me on a surprise date to an art show that I had told him in a precious text that I was interested in. 180 degree turn. A random woman paid for my Tim Horton’s coffee when that was a thing a few years ago. Was I supposed to go down on her as a thank you?
Anyway. A guy doesn’t have to be a douchbag to have and express boundaries, their needs and wants to a girl. A charming, positive non bitter man who genuinely likes and is decent to women can be with this way without being narcissistic or an ahole.
When a guy has standards and values and stands up for them because that’s who he really is, that’s attractive. When a guy acts Iike he has standards and values because women are evil and need to be managed in some way, that’s not attractive to women with value who see right through that sh*t anyway.
Of course, there are women who will consistently date actual douchbags, but people tend to consistently attract what they themselves are, and women who always date jerks tend to be jerks in some way themselves, just like sluts always date the male version of themselves and cheaters will always date other cheaters and vapid people date other vapid people and so on....
