Why talking too much is bad..

[cola]

Guys who talk to much come off as needy. I notice a lot of the people in the pick up artist game talk a lot and feel the need to dominate the conversation, if your not having success with this, try not talking as
much. If a chick is interested in you, you shouldn't have to talk an excessive amount.

Attraction is created before you open your mouth with your body language. She knows if she would go out with you before you even open your mouth. If your talking too much you may be talking yourself out of the deal.

Instead, focus on making your words counts, stick to need to know information and save small talk for the date.

Opinions are appreciated.

 

[sighsigh]

I think it's common PUA knowledge that you let the girl do most of the talking.

I don't know if it comes across as needy... maybe to some extent, since it possibly seems like you are trying too hard.

The best reason not to talk is because you will naturally want to talk about yourself, and it's in your best interest to remain a mystery. The reason for this is that if you are a mystery, a girl will take your black areas and build them up to be whatever she wants... talking about yourself will only divorce you more from the image of the Great Catch that she thinks you are.

Also, people love to talk, and especially about themselves... she will just have a better time in general if she is the one who does the talking... and especially if she is talking about herself.

 

[cola]

I think it's common PUA knowledge that you let the girl do most of the talking.

No its not, or I wouldn't have made the post, I see field reports all the time with guys talking too much.

I don't know if it comes across as needy... maybe to some extent, since it possibly seems like you are trying too hard.

Sentence is a oxymoron, why would someone try too hard if they weren't seeking attention/apporval.. Which is needy behavior.

and it's in your best interest to remain a mystery.

Perhaps, but most of the time trying to be mysterious just ends up making you look creepy, not practical.

 

[sstype]

Guys who talk to much come off as needy. I notice a lot of the people in the pick up artist game talk a lot and feel the need to dominate the conversation, if your not having success with this, try not talking as
much. If a chick is interested in you, you shouldn't have to talk an excessive amount.

Attraction is created before you open your mouth with your body language. She knows if she would go out with you before you even open your mouth. If your talking too much you may be talking yourself out of the deal.

Instead, focus on making your words counts, stick to need to know information and save small talk for the date.

Opinions are appreciated.

Good advice. One of my weak points is when I'm talking with a girl I'll sometimes get way too caught up in what I'm going to say/ask next and not just letting the conversation flow naturally.

One caveat being is if she is a bit more on the reserved side at first its ok to do most of the talking and then once she opens up and starts talking back more you can scale back a bit.

 

[sighsigh]

Sentence is a oxymoron, why would someone try too hard if they weren't seeking attention/apporval.. Which is needy behavior.

What? I said that perhaps to some extent talking too much may come across as needy, because if you talk too much it might seem like you are trying too hard.

I'm curious: why do you think talking too much comes across as needy?

 

[st_99]

Well, I think its true that when you open your mouth impressions can change for the better or worse. I think you willl be labeled anxious, nervous, sauve, chill, smart, stupid, etc.. when you start talking so yeah, its important.

 

[FairShake]

I think alot of us with social and approach anxiety tend to talk too much to fill in any available space during a conversation. If you are doing that it will come across as needy and egocentric. Neither you really want people to think you are. Of course, the other half of the time we are too quiet because we are worried we are too socially inept for entertaining.

I think the best advice I've ever seen is let the woman talk about herself and wait until she asks about you. Don't worry about silences (cool people don't worry about them) and don't worry if you aren't particularly suave, interesting, or funny. Trying too hard not to be boring and not speaking in fear of being boring are far worse than actually being boring.

 

[Megaman XIV]

Talk to lead into another conversation topic.

Game leverages attraction that is already present.