Why she like this? Manipulative girl

[joe45]

Met this girl at mall and we had instant date first time and on second date she's telling me how to dress. Wear wool jacket , dress shoes , white shirt , pretty much white collar worker and not that backpack. I dress better on day 3 and she tells me she was just joking and oh u actually listened.
Another time she tells me she likes cheesecake and next date I arrange cheesecake date and she says she don't want eat it since she get fat.
Other time she bugs me about not having a car and 4 th I borrow one and she says she not comfortable sitting in my car since she don't know me well.

Pretty much always changing her mind one day this and next week different.

Is she being manipulative ,or flakey or what ????i just don't want a moody dating girl

She also cares a lot about looks and style.
She sees a counsellor for depressiion .she like very superficial . Never met a girl who telling how to dress on day2 and telling me to wear this jacket and it look better on me. It's all about more handsome if u wear this.
She has no job for 2 years 24 lives at home.
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[( . )( . )]

Is she being manipulative ,or flakey or what ????i just don't want a moody dating girl
She also cares a lot about looks and style.
She sees a counsellor for depressiion .

Her = Standard modern woman sh!t testing and setting up hoops.

You = Standard herbling failing sh!t tests and jumping through hoops.

You have been here since 05, you should have known years ago textbook procedure is if a girl you haven't boned tells you what to wear you laugh in her face. And even if you have boned her it better be no more than a friendly suggestion because you dress like a hobo.

 

[casaanova]

She's a reformed slut. You pump it, dump it and move on with your business asap. You don't want to hang around them for long because this is exactly what happens - they dump all their problems, emotions and illogical banter on you simply for the attention - half of the time what their saying doesn't even make any sense

 

[Die Hard]

If you want sex from her, you need to start acting like a man, coz you are totally under her control right now.

If you want more than sex from her, you should stop seeing her right now coz she is gonna use that to fvck with your mind.

 

[Sir_Laid_A_Lot]

Run away from her !!!! She is manipulative and is trying to test her boundaries and see if she can control the frame and get you to do what she wants you to do. Next time she tells you to dress and stuff tell her that you will dress the way you like and you don't care whether she likes it or not. You should call them on their behavior the moment they behave like this. Her behavior is not consistent with what she says. Basically she is testing you in a way. Call her on that.

 

[GotED?]

Modern age 'Masculinized Woman' in my book.

Find a feminine one. Takes a while, but worth the blood & sweat.

 

[Sir_Laid_A_Lot]

By the way she's neither flaky nor moody. She's testing to see if you have a backbone or not. She is definitely a taker and not a giver.

 

[bukowski_merit]

Met this girl at mall and we had instant date first time and on second date she's telling me how to dress. Wear wool jacket , dress shoes , white shirt , pretty much white collar worker and not that backpack. I dress better on day 3 and she tells me she was just joking and oh u actually listened.

+1 to her

Another time she tells me she likes cheesecake and next date I arrange cheesecake date and she says she don't want eat it since she get fat.

Spoiled brat.

But you need to understand that a lot of women's moods and desires change like light switches.

"I love [a]"

can instantly become

"I hate [a] because of "

Simply based on current emotional state. Men do this too, but on a much less bi-polar level. This is why it's best to do what YOU want to do and not pay much attention to what they say.

Other time she bugs me about not having a car and 4 th I borrow one and she says she not comfortable sitting in my car since she don't know me well.

You have to be a troll... right? No one actually does crap like this, do they? You went and borrowed a car to please her and then were surprised that she didn't care?

Stop caring about what she's saying.... THERE'S NO ANSWERS IN HER WORDS OTHER THAN THAT SHE DOESN'T LIKE WHEN YOU DO AS SHE WISHES.

Pretty much always changing her mind one day this and next week different.

We live in an A.D.D society..... Get used to this... And stop caring about pleasing their schizophrenic minds...

What's going on here (if you're real) is YOUR fault. Not hers. She's taking advantage of a sucker.

Is she being manipulative ,or flakey or what ????

She's just fvcking with you; like you're a toy.

This isn't real manipulation.

I'm sure she's capable of real manipulation and probably really good at it. But why would she need to use it on someone who's already there to chump up to her stupid words?

 

[escaleraroyal]

Yes, she is being manipulative.

Everytime she tells you to do something, and you do it, she:
a) loses respect for you
b)gains power over you.

Let me get this straight: She is 24, hasn't had a job for 2 years, and is very superficial? Your words.

In addition (my words) she is manipulative, power hungry, arrogant and thinks "she is all that"

I would recommend you move on - you won't change her.

Totally disagree with is this. Nothing wrong listening and improving yourself. That's how you keep communication open in a relationship.

 

[Kbomb]

Totally disagree with is this. Nothing wrong listening and improving yourself. That's how you keep communication open in a relationship.

ok. So you seem to like following orders. Good luck being a bit^h.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

LoL@ the responses so far. I find it hilarious how people like to assume a girl is putting all her thought power into purposefully manipulating a guy when, more often than not, they're not even consciously trying to do it. So, let's put away all the comments about "she's trying to sh!t test you" or "she's trying to control the frame" and get to the bottom line of this whole thing.

And here it is: she's being difficult and sending mixed signals; therefore, she's not worth your time.

There. I just saved you a bunch of time that you'd be using to question what her intentions are behind her behavior. Because, at the end of the day, even if she DID like you, the fact is that the behavior she's displaying is stuff that no man should be wanting to have to deal with simply so he can say he's got a girl on his arm. Nor should you feel like you need to be the one to try and change her - if she's already like this before you two are official, it's only going to get WORSE if you wife her up.

Hope this helps!

 

[escaleraroyal]

ok. So you seem to like following orders. Good luck being a bit^h.

If you are a relationship guy, following order is ok. Besides if you dont like it you can always talk to her and have an agreement.

 

[Sir_Laid_A_Lot]

If you are a relationship guy, following order is ok. Besides if you dont like it you can always talk to her and have an agreement.

It is irrelevant whether you are a relationship guy or not. You should never take orders from women. You do things on your own terms whether she likes it or not. JUST DON'T BE MEAN, ARROGANT OR DEMEANING TOWARDS HER. BE ASSERTIVE.

 

[floydb25]

Doesn't sound like she's manipulating you. What she IS doing is acting like a selfish, spoiled brat, and getting off on the power YOU'RE GIVING TO HER. People generally treat you as you allow them to, and will get away with anything they can, and will purposely test your boundaries to see what they CAN get away with. The more you allow and try to please - the more ungrateful, demanding, and entitled they become. Give 'em a foot, and they'll take a million miles. Be a pushover, and people will walk all over you. Etc, etc. It's only a matter of time before she goes all-out ***** on you, and starts treating you like **** (ie, bullying) - because you allow it.

Your problem is trying to please her and give her everything she wants. So naturally, she's acting like nothing is good enough, keeps making you jump through hoops, and so forth. This is how selfish, conniving *****es treat people like you. You're her little puppy dog, and she gets off on the power you give her (and knows she has it / you're eager to please / will put up with a lot of ****).

This needs to change, or you'll keep attracting selfish, abusive people like her (for both genders; *******s, users, and bullies LOVE easy-going, submissive, over-eager, desperate to please, easy to control and push around, low self-esteem givers who don't stand up for themselves, set boundaries, or say no).

It's only happening because you allow it to, and will only get worse... Unless you learn to respect yourself, and stop going out of your way to please others in an attempt to gain their approval. Selfish people know this, by the way, and WILL use it against you for their own gain.

This is NOT how you want to start getting "in" with people - by being the fair-weather guy who gets used and abused. Don't trust or give so easily and foolishly. They will only "like" you because you're their doormat. They won't genuinely respect or care about you.