Why monogamy isn't meant for some guys...

[rhcp83]

I used to dream of being with one woman who'd be "my everything." I'd be physically attracted to her, but she would be more physically attractive to me than the majority of men, we'd settle down in the countryside somewhere, play in the leaves together, have this deep, best friend connection.

I realize now it's simply not possible.

- Men love variety. Even a guy as picky as myself, I like watching specific TV shows because I can look at a handful of women that turn me on at the same time. Or like browsing porn (even though I don't look at it that often anymore) but when I do, finding a few women to get off to.

- Most women men are attracted to aren't long term potential. There's a saying "If you want to be happy and live a king's life, never make a pretty woman your wife." It's not even that they're evil or all the sh1t this site says or that they're going to cheat. It's that even the more low maintenance pretty women aren't easy to get along with and WILL fight at some point, and guys like myself and the guys on this site won't put up with her crap or just agree with her because "we're happy some woman likes us."

I know even if I can't attract some women I don't like, that I've gotten cute women without even trying at least for dates/temporary dating. No matter how good she looked, I would leave her if she continued to pull crap.

So you might say, "settle down with a more average woman"...that's doing a disservice to her as you'll just be fantasizing about other women, looking at porn, cheating, or fantasizing even if you don't cheat.

- Men and women are inherently not meant to coexist or cohabitate. Sure there are women that are easier to get along with than most, but with most women, even the not-so-good looking ones, you have to be "on" at all times.

I had a sh1tty week last week, didn't want to talk to anyone. My male friend sensed my bad mood and called my brother to make sure I was ok and talked to him on the phone for an hour. You'll never see a woman doing that, at least modern women.

I remember a guy on this site was depressed because his mom died of cancer and his gf of a year (who seemed nice and faithful to that point) left him because "he wasn't fun anymore."

So I realized romance simply isn't possible, because women don't want it in the first place. I know a woman that says she's looking for love, marriage, kids, looks like a good innocent girl, yet every weekend is at trashy bar after trashy bar and she's 34.

Maybe some of the fatties want it that haven't got any attention from guys other than for a quick hump and dump, but no offense to fatties, I'm better looking than them and keep myself in shape.

 

[zekko]

I agree that some men aren't cut out for monogamy. But men and women aren't meant to coexist? Or cohabitate? That's going a little too far.

I agree most women are trash, but there a some good ones out there. It's hard to believe until you find one, they're few and far between. My girlfriend is a gem, and I can count on one hand the times we've argued in the eight years we've been together. She's very chill, treats me great, and actually appreciates me amazingly enough.

You're right that guys like variety. I certainly do, and that doesn't go away. However, I value what I have with my relationship more than I value sex with random girls. That's what makes the difference.

A lot of young guys swear they will never settle down or whatever, and some never do. But a lot of them eventually meet somebody and then they change their mind.

 

[Warrior74]

A lot of young guys swear they will never settle down or whatever, and some never do. But a lot of them eventually meet somebody and then they change their mind.

Most of my friends got married in their late 20s, early to mid 30s. They came in two flavors.

a. those who played the field, had their fun and settled down.

b. those who never got any play and settled down for the first thing going their way.

It seems to me the happier of the two are in box a. I hear a lot less complaining about the wife or marriage from those guys. They had the tools and skillset to know what they were getting into and how to handle it. Group b. seemed to have a lot of misconceptions about women and marriage due to a lack of experience.

 

[rhcp83]

b. those who never got any play and settled down for the first thing going their way.

I'm convinced that's how 70 to 80 percent of marriages happen. Guy never got any girls, dates, sex, etc., random woman makes it really easy for him, he's like "wow a girl is paying attention to me and giving me sex" next thing you know they're married.

 

[Zodiac]

I'm convinced that's how 70 to 80 percent of marriages happen. Guy never got any girls, dates, sex, etc., random woman makes it really easy for him, he's like "wow a girl is paying attention to me and giving me sex" next thing you know they're married.

Quoted for truth. I came into this thread to say this very thing as I've seen numerous friends of mine fall victim to this, I try to ask them why they choose her or ask them to take a step back to view it rationally, get my head chewed off and then in the case of two of them have them call me up and tell me I was right in my guess of the quoted above but out on cash from the divorce.

 

[zekko]

a. those who played the field, had their fun and settled down.

b. those who never got any play and settled down for the first thing going their way.

It seems to me the happier of the two are in box a. I hear a lot less complaining about the wife or marriage from those guys. They had the tools and skillset to know what they were getting into and how to handle it. Group b. seemed to have a lot of misconceptions about women and marriage due to a lack of experience.

I totally agree. I'm thankful I never got married when I was a youngster, or I would have missed out on a lot. I almost got married to my high school sweetheart when I was very young. Thankfully, that didn't work out. It was during that experience, and in the ensuing years, where I really learned the most about women.

Maybe being good with girls when you're younger can be a bad thing. If you attract a girl too easily, and you get married before you really know what's going on with life, that's when disasters can follow. That said, I know couples who got married in their teens and they're still together 25 years later.

 

[limerickdesign]

It's all a freaking control mechanism. Our food is poisoned. Prostitution is illegal, flouride in our water, oil companies keep our land polluted, guys are taught that women want chivalry and media demonstrates the falsehood so we believe they want nice guys. Toxins nowadays are sapping us of our testosterone making us resemble girls in our lack of manliness and become submissive. We are trained not to like women who are sexually liberated and in turn women dont want to "give" it up easy so we "stick around" Men want variety but women are trained to find a guy and lock him. Everything down is up and up is down. If i see something mainstream i try to do the opposite in most cases.