Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Why Men Aren't Marrying Video

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
15,871
Reaction score
8,580
Found this video by a pastor about why men aren't marrying today. Mainly talks about how you are entering into a contract with the state, which will take the woman's side if she decides to leave. Nothing new, but I like this guy's style.

 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
15,871
Reaction score
8,580
This is a good one too. It points out that couples that cohabitate have more sex than married couples. I bring this up because the forum tends to discourage cohabitation. I like one of the comments on this video: "a wife is no longer an asset but actually a liability.". Sadly true.

 

skinnyguy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 2, 2013
Messages
3,454
Reaction score
1,258
This is a good one too. It points out that couples that cohabitate have more sex than married couples. I bring this up because the forum tends to discourage cohabitation. I like one of the comments on this video: "a wife is no longer an asset but actually a liability.". Sadly true.

TBH I kinda wanna be like you Zekko. You’re in your 50s and have been cohabitating with a woman for 10 years. She seems so chill. Most women will dump you if you don’t put a ring on their finger within two years.

My parents really want me to get married but they don’t understand the landscape now. If I had gotten married earlier in life, I’m positive I would be divorced by now. The only way I’ll get married is if my wife makes more money than me. If she’s a workaholic I might end up having a better life than I do now.

I’m just not interested in marrying a broke woman or a woman who just wants a sperm donor. I was dating a 36 year old lady a couple of years ago and she brought up wanting to settle down and have kids within the second month. I pulled out quick.
 

Dash Riprock

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 16, 2005
Messages
1,750
Reaction score
3,448
Location
Mile High City, USA
I talked to my friend about this the other day. He's 52 and has been married for 16 years now to a woman 4 years older than him. She was maybe a HB6 when I met her 15 years ago, so I just imagine what she looks like now. She seems to have her act together as a person so I will credit her there. I asked him tactfully why he got married (his second time through) and he said, and I quote, "It's nice to grow old with someone." I didn't say anything, but it just sounded really needy, insecure, and beta to me, i.e. afraid to be...ALONE.

I see no reason to get married--at all. I think men that do get married these days either "marry up" (very rare, maybe 5% of all marriages) or they are men who are extremely needy, insecure, or way too focused on what others "think" about them, i.e., "What's wrong with the perpetually single guy???" - usually asked by women - whom the courts heavily favor and will come out in 99% of all divorces!

It's a fool's errand for men.

Stay single, stay DJ, stay rich, STAY HAPPY.
 

RangerMIke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 23, 2014
Messages
4,586
Reaction score
7,447
Location
USA, Louisiana
Simply put... the cost benefit analysis does not favor the man. Half of all families end up is divorce, so men today see what happened to their fathers... or at least they know a relative or friend whose father was divorce raped.

Why jump into that wild dog pit? Why hand your balls to a creature that is weaker and not as intelligent as you and give the government to power to put you in jail if you do not bow down to her.
 

Augustus_McCrae

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 3, 2012
Messages
909
Reaction score
1,003
Found this video by a pastor about why men aren't marrying today. Mainly talks about how you are entering into a contract with the state, which will take the woman's side if she decides to leave. Nothing new, but I like this guy's style.

To give you guys a real life example:

I got divorced 4 1/2 years ago. The judgment was durational alimony for five years. $1000 a month. Lawyer fees of over 60k.

My ex sued me again a few months ago for an “alimony modification”. So far the process seems to be very similar to the original divorce. So it’s like getting divorced from the same woman twice. It’s not over yet and I’m already in for $8,500 in legal fees. If she wins, I’ll still have to keep paying her alimony and I could potentially have to pay her legal fees (whether she wins or not).

-Augustus-
 
Joined
May 25, 2017
Messages
4,849
Reaction score
861
Location
Florida, USA
To give you guys a real life example:

I got divorced 4 1/2 years ago. The judgment was durational alimony for five years. $1000 a month. Lawyer fees of over 60k.

My ex sued me again a few months ago for an “alimony modification”. So far the process seems to be very similar to the original divorce. So it’s like getting divorced from the same woman twice. It’s not over yet and I’m already in for $8,500 in legal fees. If she wins, I’ll still have to keep paying her alimony and I could potentially have to pay her legal fees (whether she wins or not).

-Augustus-
Thanks for reinforcing what I already knew not to do.

My dad gave my former stepmother millions of dollars even though she cheated on him countless times. Luckily for him, she just died.
 

Dash Riprock

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 16, 2005
Messages
1,750
Reaction score
3,448
Location
Mile High City, USA
To give you guys a real life example:

I got divorced 4 1/2 years ago. The judgment was durational alimony for five years. $1000 a month. Lawyer fees of over 60k.

My ex sued me again a few months ago for an “alimony modification”. So far the process seems to be very similar to the original divorce. So it’s like getting divorced from the same woman twice. It’s not over yet and I’m already in for $8,500 in legal fees. If she wins, I’ll still have to keep paying her alimony and I could potentially have to pay her legal fees (whether she wins or not).

-Augustus-
Every SS poster should print this post, have it etched as a copper plate, mounted to stained walnut wood, and hung on the wall of his office--so he sees it everyday.

Augie, my heart goes out to you, buddy.
 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
15,871
Reaction score
8,580
TBH I kinda wanna be like you Zekko. You’re in your 50s and have been cohabitating with a woman for 10 years. She seems so chill. Most women will dump you if you don’t put a ring on their finger within two years.

My parents really want me to get married but they don’t understand the landscape now. If I had gotten married earlier in life, I’m positive I would be divorced by now. The only way I’ll get married is if my wife makes more money than me. If she’s a workaholic I might end up having a better life than I do now.
I do think I've been lucky. She would marry me tomorrow if I asked her, but I've been fortunate in that she understands my position, and that she doesn't want children.

As for marrying a woman who makes more money, you could always do the "drop out of society" bit, quit your job, and find some chick to support you. I don't recommend it, but it could work. I'd rather have the self respect of standing on my own feet though.

I asked him tactfully why he got married (his second time through) and he said, and I quote, "It's nice to grow old with someone." I didn't say anything, but it just sounded really needy, insecure, and beta to me, i.e. afraid to be...ALONE.
I'm not in favor of men marrying in the current society (which is why I posted these videos). And I don't know you're friend. But I see nothing specifically beta about his statement: It's nice to grow old with someone. It is. Not for everyone, I guess, but it's no more needy or beta than wanting to have friends in your life. Or no more needy or beta than wanting to have a harem, for that matter. Most of us enjoy female companionship, it's just a question about what form that takes.
 

Who Dares Win

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 16, 2012
Messages
7,545
Reaction score
5,898
To give you guys a real life example:

I got divorced 4 1/2 years ago. The judgment was durational alimony for five years. $1000 a month. Lawyer fees of over 60k.

My ex sued me again a few months ago for an “alimony modification”. So far the process seems to be very similar to the original divorce. So it’s like getting divorced from the same woman twice. It’s not over yet and I’m already in for $8,500 in legal fees. If she wins, I’ll still have to keep paying her alimony and I could potentially have to pay her legal fees (whether she wins or not).

-Augustus-
You have tha patience of a saint and hope your karma will pay you back 100 times for that.

Someone else in your place would have solved with other means than lawyers.
 

Augustus_McCrae

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 3, 2012
Messages
909
Reaction score
1,003
You have tha patience of a saint and hope your karma will pay you back 100 times for that.

Someone else in your place would have solved with other means than lawyers.
I have kids, so that changes everything. If not for them, I would have left the country.

I’ve developed a stoic attitude about it. I had to. If a man dwells on how unfair the system is, it has the potential to put him in a very dark place. I have a lot of life left, my children, good friends and family.

So I chose to fight this as hard as I can. Given how fvcked up the system is, I got a good judgement the first time considering I was married just shy of 30 years. I won’t give that evil bit@h a dime that I don’t have to.

One of the reasons I post here is to help other guys understand that when they get married, they are literally putting their time, fortune, earnings, and freedom at risk for potentially the rest of their lives.

-Augustus-
 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
15,871
Reaction score
8,580
So I chose to fight this as hard as I can. Given how fvcked up the system is, I got a good judgement the first time considering I was married just shy of 30 years. I won’t give that evil bit@h a dime that I don’t have to.

One of the reasons I post here is to help other guys understand that when they get married, they are literally putting their time, fortune, earnings, and freedom at risk for potentially the rest of their lives.
We appreciate it. Your experience just goes to show that even after almost 30 years, things can fall apart. No matter how well you screen, you don't know what you are both going to be like 30 years down the line.
 

AttackFormation

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2014
Messages
4,128
Reaction score
3,666
Age
31
Location
Sweden
There's no reason to get married, but there's at least two reasons to cohabitate... 1. You want kids who don't have to grow up in as fvcked a family as you did, 2. She makes way more than you, so not only is she the provider by default but you would come out ahead in a "cohabitation-divorce" (like we now have in my country at least) and the odds are higher that she's with you because she wants to be - especially/at least if she's not freaking out over her biological clock yet.

My attitude is if a woman wants there to be more than sex and some light hearted companionship between us, she's the one who has to convince me - and I'm not taking on any liabilities.
 

PeasantPlayer

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 20, 2013
Messages
3,122
Reaction score
959
All my friends are marrying, they are all beta chumps is to be expected
 
Joined
May 25, 2017
Messages
4,849
Reaction score
861
Location
Florida, USA
There's no reason to get married, but there's at least two reasons to cohabitate... 1. You want kids who don't have to grow up in as fvcked a family as you did, 2. She makes way more than you, so not only is she the provider by default but you would come out ahead in a "cohabitation-divorce" (like we now have in my country at least) and the odds are higher that she's with you because she wants to be - especially/at least if she's not freaking out over her biological clock yet.

My attitude is if a woman wants there to be more than sex and some light hearted companionship between us, she's the one who has to convince me - and I'm not taking on any liabilities.
What about the most important reason to cohabitate...

Sex all the time without having to drive.
 
Joined
May 25, 2017
Messages
4,849
Reaction score
861
Location
Florida, USA
I've been saying it for years on this forum: You can do everything a married man does....house....kids...all of it..... just don't get legally married.

I did all of those things a married man does and it eventually fell apart like many marriages do. When it did, a female judge awarded me everything. The house, custody of my kid, no alimony, no child support, etc. Why? Because when you take that marriage license out of the equation, courts will always rule in favor of whatever is in the best interest of the child. The provider usually wins these battles on those terms. All of those biased, feministic laws become absolutely powerless without that license to back it up. Eliminate that, and it pretty much becomes a fair game again. If a woman is the main provider; if she's bringing home the bacon, pays the mortgage, etc. and she gets custody of the kids, well then fair is fair.

With all of this women's rights and feminism being championed these days, why not call them out on it? With these rights, with these abilities, equal pay and all of that other sh*t, well then they should have no problem playing a fair game. No marriage license, provider wins if all else fails....go! Lets see how they like that arrangement...
I wonder how it would play out if said provider had been to prison for cyberstalking.

I took a test for schizophrenia about a month ago and I do not have it.

These are things I think about almost every day.
 
U

user43770

Guest
I've been saying it for years on this forum: You can do everything a married man does....house....kids...all of it..... just don't get legally married.

I did all of those things a married man does and it eventually fell apart like many marriages do. When it did, a female judge awarded me everything. The house, custody of my kid, no alimony, no child support, etc. Why? Because when you take that marriage license out of the equation, courts will always rule in favor of whatever is in the best interest of the child. The provider usually wins these battles on those terms. All of those biased, feministic laws become absolutely powerless without that license to back it up. Eliminate that, and it pretty much becomes a fair game again. If a woman is the main provider; if she's bringing home the bacon, pays the mortgage, etc. and she gets custody of the kids, well then fair is fair.

With all of this women's rights and feminism being championed these days, why not call them out on it? With these rights, with these abilities, equal pay and all of that other sh*t, well then they should have no problem playing a fair game. No marriage license, provider wins if all else fails....go! Lets see how they like that arrangement...
Which country are you in? Most (?) states in the U.S. have common law marriage, meaning after you've lived with a person for X amount of time, you're legally married in the government's eyes.
 

CMNILS87

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 17, 2016
Messages
915
Reaction score
669
Age
36
I have kids, so that changes everything. If not for them, I would have left the country.

I’ve developed a stoic attitude about it. I had to. If a man dwells on how unfair the system is, it has the potential to put him in a very dark place. I have a lot of life left, my children, good friends and family.

So I chose to fight this as hard as I can. Given how fvcked up the system is, I got a good judgement the first time considering I was married just shy of 30 years. I won’t give that evil bit@h a dime that I don’t have to.

One of the reasons I post here is to help other guys understand that when they get married, they are literally putting their time, fortune, earnings, and freedom at risk for potentially the rest of their lives.

-Augustus-
How did they decide that she should get 1000 dollars a month for 5 years. And how is it even possible to file a motion again to change it 4.5 years after right when it’s aboit to expire. Does a judge not see through this as greed?
 

Von

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 23, 2016
Messages
2,226
Reaction score
1,236
Age
35
How did they decide that she should get 1000 dollars a month for 5 years. And how is it even possible to file a motion again to change it 4.5 years after right when it’s aboit to expire. Does a judge not see through this as greed?
The humbers are not random.. it's a complex calculation of : How long you've been together, How much income SHE makes, How much Incomes YOU, What's your Asset, How many kids and how old, what the divorce would do in terms of ''impact'' on the kids life style, and how to balance it.

The woman will always try to ask for more (especially if she hates you... aka usually 90% of divorcee... or has addictions)... and the ''seeking more'' will always come in the form of : ''Because I have less money... I can't offer my kids as much as their dads... thus creating a resentment of my kids towards me... since they have a better life with daddy''

In some country... if it's proven you live on under the same roof without being married (like having a mortgage together) or you have kids together... you are technically automatically married especially fiscaly (income - tax report wise)
 
Joined
May 25, 2017
Messages
4,849
Reaction score
861
Location
Florida, USA
It's very unlikely old stuff like that is going to come up in a typical family court hearing. You only need to worry about what you do from the point you have kids onwards. As long as you're a good dad, provide, stay out of trouble; no domestic dispute calls to the police, no restraining orders filed, no child protection services getting involved, etc., you'll be fine. You just have to keep your cool. You can't allow anger issues to get the best of you.
Good to hear.
 
Top