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Why is my ex-girlfriend still sleeping with me? Pls help!!!

markbr

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Hey guys. I've been in a 3-year relationship with a girl from the same university and about 2 months ago she said she doesn't want to be in this relationship anymore. Now, i've been reading bout PUA material for about 4 years now so I can understand why she left me. (i.e not interesting/attactive anymore, neglecting her emotionally and physically for too long and being a wuss) Looking back, I realise she left me because I did not invest as much time and effort into this relationship as she did.

Here's where it gets interesting. I know she's seeing someone else but she's not admitting it. And thats because the guy she's seeing is a rich university lecturer, 25 years older and who's married with children, so there's no way she could tell anyone about it! She doesn't know that I know this though.

She calls me over for dinner and things but doesn't like me staying over late at night, presumably because the lecturer calls her then. Now in the last 2 weeks, we've had sex 4 times (thrice this week). Next week, she and the lecturer will be going on a work conference/trip together for a week. My question is why would she still have sex with me if she's in a 'relationship' with him? Could it be that she's uncertain whether it'll work out long term with him and therefore she'll sleep with me until she's sure?

I've decided that Im gonna go out, meet new women and improve myself regardless of what she does or who's she's with but I just wanna know what you guys think about it.

Thanks a lot.
 

Eccentric

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Simply put, your ex is a *****.
 

Rhoto

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Better question, why are you sleeping with your ex?

What happens if she gets pregnant?

Go find some new women dude, stop being pathetic.
 

Tantric

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I suspect she is not sleeping with the "other guy" very often (as he is married). She knows it will not go anywhere, so she is coming to the next best thing.

Possible she wants to get back with you...

The question is if you want to get back with her.

To be honest wtih you, I would stop hooking up or just ask her direct.

If you don't want to get back with her, just keep sleeping with her, and not worry about the outcome...
 

Aragon034

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could be she just wants a **** buddy.

i'm surprised, there are alot of women out there who would love having a guy she can just call up and have sex with when she feels the urge. they just want to avoid the whole drama when the guy wants to marry her or whatnot.

the problem with this is that unless you engage her and work something out, it's a demeaning position. This is because it's HER who wants a romp in the sheets, and it's HER who gives you the 'honor' of being a **** friend.

like most things, what are you after? do you want a relationship with her? or are you just in it for the *****?

Tricky situation if you want to maintain something with her.
 

broken dreams

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Tantric said:
I suspect she is not sleeping with the "other guy" very often (as he is married). She knows it will not go anywhere, so she is coming to the next best thing.

Possible she wants to get back with you...

The question is if you want to get back with her.

To be honest wtih you, I would stop hooking up or just ask her direct.

If you don't want to get back with her, just keep sleeping with her, and not worry about the outcome...

Rhoto said:
Better question, why are you sleeping with your ex?

What happens if she gets pregnant?

Go find some new women dude, stop being pathetic.



you dont know where the pied piper is leading you.

INNER GAME = SELF RESPECT


dude I posted : women who play men by a girl.


you will have a description how females think on this.

she is definately a classic player who is juggling you.

she knows you are available whenevers and gives herself to the professor cause she likes that he is married and ****.and most probably he gives her money and takes her out buys her **** spends money on her.

so he is #1


you are the bench on level down, beneath.

there are 2 sides either she is using you or you are using her on your terms.

A male player will sleep with women as described in tyler's sccret society and that is acceptable to a woman.

But she was your EX !

so she is getting benefits and exclusivity of having you whenever she wants without putting up with your relationship issue.

The problem here is that is isnt straight forward with you and honest that it is just a ****.

So I suggest when you **** her show no em otions cut off you emotional connection to sex and just **** her like a porn star.

but your self respect as she was your Ex , shows that she doesn't respect you and lying to you.

You deicde dude, its a difficult call but since she was your Ex ....

She will hold you back from meeting or connecting with other women cause It was her who cut you and not her.

This will not change inless you switch tables on her.

All depends on your deep feelings for her.

I myself am in a similar situation where the ***** told me she was ****ing other guys which we were together.
So she ended it wanting to be friends and I said no.

Now she wants to see me to **** but I have self respect cause I know her too well and what she did will always bug me and I will come off as a flexible to my own standards and incongruent.

therefore she will lose respect.


Self Respect Vs non emotional connection

Remebr she was your EX !

So you did connect and did have emotional investment in her but she threw it away just to be with professor money$$ to pay bills .

this is wher not alot of guys talk about it but yes the professor is paying your EX with gifts and spending money

( I confirmed this with a stripper I spoke to her and ask her. said she liked older men cause they gave her money)

plus he gives her emotional spikes like a jerk does.. she know they cant be together so she misses him,

she thinks about him in his abscence and know he is with another woman which causes jealousy and treating her like 2nd place

(sound familiar dude, she is his 2nd and you are her 2nd , chain of doom if you ask me)

plus the financial $$$$$ comfort to dinners and teacher's pet or whatever.

Ahhh remeber monica lewinsky? social proof cause he is older and professor.


Its a long post but I broke it down for you all the attractive qualities.
BOOM!

I put alot of effort into it and even asked a stripper as opinion.

You choose bro.

live your life like the sex pistols version of the song "My way"


You want to **** her up mentally you can play with her emotions to get her obsessed using pscology and what you see here the bluprint of what she is doing. you need is to create intrigue and you create attraction to a degree of obsession.

Watch 9 1/2 weeks with mickey rourke. to see what im talking about.

but it is unhealthy and too much effort.


Drop it
 

guywhoneedshelp

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markbr

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Thanks for the advice guys. What you guys are saying is actually true and is happening now, especially what Aragon034 and broken dreams said! She doesn't initiate sex, in fact she said we shouldn't be doing it. It's just that when Im over at her place we may end up watching a movie or dancing etc. I start kissing and massaging and we end up having sex. I initiate it. Although the sex is great, there's no connection anymore. It's meaningless. And it sucks bad when I think about it the next day. And she gets all nasty when she finds out Im going to the gym with another guy who's a player as well. If I were to tell her now that Im going out clubbing, she would definitely cut off all contact immediately. You're right. The power is with her. That feeling of powerlessness sucks.

Im not a player or PUA. I wanna be one. But Im lucky enough to have resources to go out and improve myself and get better with women, and im gonna achieve no matter what. Personally, I see this break-up as the biggest learning experience in the past 3 years. That way, im grateful.

About the spying on her, I have enough evidence to **** her life up and the professors life up. Lecturer-student relationships are not allowed in universities. If I do submit evidence, he would lose his job and she'll be kicked out. I even know where his wife lives. But I dont see any point in doing that. It'll be too much of a hassle and I'll have nothing to gain out of doing that anyway. Im gonna take your advice, stick to it and move on.
 

r0cky

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She doesn't initiate sex, in fact she said we shouldn't be doing it. It's just that when Im over at her place we may end up watching a movie or dancing etc. I start kissing and massaging and we end up having sex. I initiate it. Although the sex is great, there's no connection anymore. It's meaningless. And it sucks bad when I think about it the next day.
I concluded this from your first post. Basically what you have here is, you and your ex, two people with low self worth and not much respect for each other. This is so common in ex couples where both have low selfesteem.

See, you as the man should take the initative and stop this completely. She is basically using you.
But yea sex, wat man cares about being used for sex?
A man that respects himself.

Her selfesteem is pretty much on the floor so she's too weak to hold off on sex, and you're too weak to stop contacting her.
Man up and realize that if this continues one of you will get hurt. If not, one day she will man up befote you do and drop you like a bag of dirt.

And then its hello depressive ex bf.
 

cuzza

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I can't answer WHY she's sleeping with you, but I can tell you what to do.

If you WANT to sleep with her - then don't be puffy and do it.
If you still want a relationship with her and it kills you to do it - DON'T.
 

WC2

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guywhoneedshelp said:
Here's what you need to do. Keylog her computer. Then find out a series of conversations she has with this new guy in her life, print them out, and drop them in front of her. Enjoy the look on her face. Chances are, they are exchanging e-mails, MySpace messages, or AIM conversations.

http://www.extremebumming.com/Leykis-2007-09-27_Hr1-KeyLoggers.mp3
http://www.extremebumming.com/Leykis-2007-09-27_Hr2-KeyLoggers2.mp3
And I thought you had redeemed yourself when you were posting about relationships earlier this week. This is a game of poor saps. I pity you.

Anyways, as for the ex two things -

1. She knows exactly what she's doing. She's getting sex from both directions whenever she wants and she loves it.

2. Getting back with this girl would be f*cking disastrous.

I was in a relationship similar to this. My ex was dating a new dude, and I was dating a new woman. But she still wanted sex. Eventually I built the balls to refuse her. There's much better places to get sex besides your ex-- especially if she's getting around like a f*cking dog in heat. Expand your horizons and get past your past. It's just much healthier.
 

I.A.F.Y.B.

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Forget about why she is doing this. Just know your ex is a whor now and move on!!!
 
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