Why is it that...

[Mr.Kennedy]

you meet great girls when you are taken?

Long story short, 30, married (in the verge of a divorce), etc. Meet a cousin of one of my friends a couple of weeks ago, we started talking (IM at the beginning) and hit it up pretty well (I actually tried most of the techniques Ive read from this site for the first time and they actually work!), exchanged numbers and talk for a while. She actually told me on Thursday that she was going to a pub in my town and that I was welcome to go and "stalk" her. I didn't went that night because I knew she was expecting me... so on Friday we made plans to go out on Saturday night... but on that same Friday night she invited me over to another club and I didn't went also. So, on Saturday we did went out and actually had a great time, and we have continued talking and she has already told me that she likes me quite a lot. So, last night I told her to meet with me today for breakfast and she said yes, we did had breakfast by the sea (I live in a tropical island) and it was pretty cool...


....and here comes the bad part. I sent her a message this afternoon about how good a time I had with her on the morning and that she was kind of nervous (gotta admit I kinda was, too), and she replied back and said that she was nervous because she just met me and she was already with me on my car, etc etc and that I am a MARRIED man. She knew this from the beginning and now that I am actually starting to like her she hits me with this sh*t. So I told her that I didn't wanted her to feel bad about talking to me and that any decision that she made I would respect. This is not the case of "she's hot so I wanna f*ck her" and more of a "she's hot, intelligent and a great conversationalist" and I'm kinda attracted to all that.

Basically it all boils down to that she likes me, but my #@%$% status has her 2nd guessing everything, even though she knows that I'm not longer with my wife. And it sucks because she has a great keen sense of humor, is very intelligent and at least a HB8 on my book.

What the hell can I do? Shall I just disappear for a while? I mean, Im thinking in this case the decision is off my hands...

 

[realsmoothie]

Because when you're taken you project all manner of confidence... subconsciously, I think.

I noticed this recently... just starting to see someone, and all sorts of ladies are springing up out of nowhere. WTF.

 

[Phyzzle]

Have you ever heard a woman complain, "he keeps saying he's going to divorce his wife. He says he loves me. Waaahh!"

I have. And what did I think? I thought she was a pathetic retard. Well, this woman doesn't want to be some pathetic retard that you jerk around while you decide what to do about your marriage.

How long does it take to get a divorce there? Figure it out and TELL HER. Giver her a date. You don't have to dissappear, just try seeing her once a week, real low pressure. She wants that divorce official, and I for one can totally see her point of view.

 

[Faca]

you meet great girls when you are taken?

No, man... you meet girls.. all the time.. but when you have already someone.. you dont fear approaching girls!

 

[Drum&Bass]

Because when you're taken you project all manner of confidence... subconsciously

Single or Taken you should always have women trying to get a piece of you, if that isn't the case...your not as confident as you think you are...theres no such thing as "all manner of confidence"..your either secure in yourself or not, you either have social skills to compliment your confidence or you don't.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Because you have someone to compare them to. This is the problem when you don't sarge multiple women at one time. It's like when you buy a car; you do tons of research and eventually find a "good enough" deal.

A week later (when you believe you aren't really looking) you find a better deal. When women do this we say that they're looking for a BBD (bigger, better deal). Back to the car analogy, you do best when you can drive multiple models during the same time frame (preferably the same day).

The problem with women is that guys get one-itis and don't truly drive several models. They end up going with the "good enough deal" and low and behold, look at what is on a lot that you hadn't visited; a BBD.

 

[Mr.Kennedy]

So I did the dissapearing act, and she kept sending messages every day basically giving me a review of her day and whatnot, and she invited me to a couple of places on Friday and Saturday (to which of course I kinda ignored her). So now she is giving me more and more attention, but like the last person said: If you only sarge one girl, then you are missing out on the other potential girls that are out there. And Ive decided to sarge multiple girls at once, so I can have my choice whenever I need a quick fix of good ol' sex. :rockon:

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...And Ive decided to sarge multiple girls at once, so I can have my choice whenever I need a quick fix of good ol' sex. :rockon:

See, simple concept with obvious benefits.

 

[resilient]

I hear ya Kennedy...

When I was in a ballroom club at college to learn how to become a better dancer for a semester, I came across AFC... even when I was single and good looking/groomed/and well toned. I had no social value being a newbie. I genuinely tried to learn to dance and gave off a playful vibe, but somehow I still gave off the low-confidence single guy on the prowl vibe despite approaching a few hundred women that year.

It wasn't until I got a g/f through social dancing and girls found out about us from myspace and a social dance that things began to change. Now all these girls are giving me incoming on myspace with comments and flirting with me huge at class. Ones that I was interested and whom turned me away or now trying to game me back now that I'm in a relationship.

I think it's a mix of feeling safe to flirt with me because I'm taken and then liking the lure of trying to make me stray from my girl because women are naturally more competitive than us men are. There was a good recent thread on this forum, but I can't find it at the moment about taken women flirting.

* As far as your new plate your spinning, Doc Love says to make sure you have all your divorce papers squared away with processing dates in line before you start to sarge other girls. Also as a disclaimer, let the new ones you're dating in advance know how that's coming along, so they aren't strung along that you're just using them for some rebound material and that you have "sincere interest".