"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Why do women value confidence so much?

mr. kennedy

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It's arguably the most sought after trait in a man.

Is it because women for the most part don't have it and they are looking in a partner that can complement them in that area?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Maximus Rex

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Confidence is a sign of your ability to provide for and protect them.
 
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mr. kennedy

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Based on your answer, does that mean a woman in a high paying field (doctor, dentist, lawyer) will value confidence less than a woman in a low paying field (hairdresser, nurse)?
 

Jetleg

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its biological. testosterone makes you more agressive and gives you naturallymore confidence.
Female lions check the size of b@lls of male lions, female humans have to relay upon how you act (and many other factors of course)

Hence more condifet you are, the more manly you are (in theory)
 
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Jetleg

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Based on your answer, does that mean a woman in a high paying field (doctor, dentist, lawyer) will value confidence less than a woman in a low paying field (hairdresser, nurse)?
Woman will always value confidence, but confidence is only important in order to initiate things...
This has nothing to do with confidence, women (most likely) won't date down, because they are hypergamous, if you are making less than them, you will have to compensate with something else (fame, humor, height and whatever), i honestly don't think that confidence alone will be enough to compensate in this case (for most women).
 
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"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Harry Wilmington

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Based on your answer, does that mean a woman in a high paying field (doctor, dentist, lawyer) will value confidence less than a woman in a low paying field (hairdresser, nurse)?
You're missing the point. Having "confidence" isn't about who makes more money - heck, I was dating women who were lawyers, doctors, etc. when I was working at a Quiznos shop and living on someone's couch.

According to the dictionary, confidence is "belief in oneself and one's powers or abilities." Meaning, if you either have or can project the believe that you believe you have the ability to protect a woman from harm, give her a good time sexually and show her the kind of life no other man can show her, you can maintain (and increase) a woman's desire for you, regardless of your life situation.

And, whether she's a woman that makes a lot of money or doesn't, they all have that need to be with a man that is sure of himself and what he wants in life. Women themselves are always questioning themselves - even if she has a high-paying job, she may think she's not pretty enough, or weighs too much, or isn't sure of the next move she needs to make in life. In short, when she has these questions she needs someone to either guide her or help her realize what decision would be best for her to make. Men are GREAT at decision making - or at least they are supposed to be - and, therefore, it does her no good to find a man who can't help make a decision when SHE can't make a decision either.

That's why women HATE when they ask a man what he wants to do on a date, and his response is "I dunno - whatever you want to do." YOU are supposed to have enough confidence in your decision-making abilities to choose something and KNOW she'll have a good time (by virtue of simply being with you, and not having to make the decision herself).
 

YawataNoKami

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Why? Because women do not have any. It is an illusion , a hoax.Destroy a woman "confidence" is as easy as calling her fat.
 

wifehunter

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I actually look for confidence in a lady. I find confident ladies easier to talk to. Things just flow better.
 

zekko

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I think it has to do with male/female gender roles. If women play their traditional passive/submissive role, then the man is going to have to initiate, lead, and escalate. NOTHING can happen between the sexes in this situation if the male doesn't have the balls (confidence) to make things happen.

And women will admire this in a male, because often the don't have the nerve to go across the room and grab some random guy to dance.

Also, if a guy is high value, usually the guy will have confidence as a result. In this case, it's not the confidence she likes so much, it's the sign that he is high value.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Trump

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It's arguably the most sought after trait in a man.

Is it because women for the most part don't have it and they are looking in a partner that can complement them in that area?
Bro you got to be kidding. Let's put it another way:

Why do you value a girls look so much? Why don't you seek a fat ugly girl who speaks 4 languages and has a PhD to have sex with?

If you had a daughter, would you want her to date a loser type of guy with his head down, gets taken advantage of and afraid of people?

Sometimes you guys ask questions on here makes me wonder how you survive in the real world, let alone go on dates to have sex with a girl.
 

parkthebus

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I think it's for social reasons. Confidence is a trait displayed by alpha males in a group of men. So confidence simply implies social dominance which is the essence of what creates the giny tingles.
 

3agle 3yes

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Imagine being an attractive woman, 90% of your experience with men has been them giving you their undivided attention, allowing you to get away with things, sucking up to you and being nervous around you.

Confidence is the child of self esteem.

It's when you value your life above anyone else's (of course I don't mean this in a selfish way).

If your self esteem is high you won't give your power away and you won't to rely on anybody for an emotional high...This will show in everything you do.

Women deep down, don't see themselves as special and the emotionally healthy one's IMO, don't want to be treated special.
 

J Roc

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Would you want to be operated on by a Doctor with Low Confidence?
 

parkthebus

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Would you want to be operated on by a Doctor with Low Confidence?
My answer would be no because he wouldn't give me the confidence that the surgery will be a success. And I think that's a normal thought pattern to take. Which makes me think, does this mean that confidence is transferable? If you feel confident then do those around you feel more confident? And if yes, then a major pull for women to men, or for anyone to anyone who's confidence, is that their confidence essentially makes you feel good about yourself.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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foreverAFC

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when women say they like men with confidence what they are saying is that they like it when guys they find attractive come talk to them, cause i see tons of attractive women who are dating insecure male btches who cant even look another man in the eye, confidence means something different to women than what guys think it means
 

Serenity

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Confidence is the belief in oneself and ones ability to do things. The more convinced you are that you can do something the more confidence you have. The confidence women look for is the ability to lead, meaning to effectively make decisions and plan a course of action to get whatever done. Effectively meaning being able to do it without support, because women often don't have a clue about how to handle some things.

The highest degree of confidence is to know something with certainty. Like I know I can drive a car, I have very high confidence in my ability to do so. I know how to make most women wet, but there's no certainty so it's impossible to have as high confidence about that. I have no idea how to do backflips, so naturally my confidence is low in that area.
 

SeymourCake

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Confidence is a sign of healthy testosterone levels. Testosterone is the sex hormone women are attracted to.
 

parkthebus

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I think based on the mass of reasons given here, there's a lot of reasons why.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

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