"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Why am I such a B!TCH??

Chrom3y

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I keep saying this to myself over and over. And its cause of something stupid. I've got a problem with approaching a girl Im messing with while she's with her friends. I can't even flirt with her while she's with her friends, I jst dont know what to say to them. I kiss her in the hallways and all that but when she's with her friends I just avoid her sometimes. WHAT THE FVCK?? Anyone else like this?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Brighty

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Chrom3y said:
I keep saying this to myself over and over. And its cause of something stupid. I've got a problem with approaching a girl Im messing with while she's with her friends. I can't even flirt with her while she's with her friends, I jst dont know what to say to them. I kiss her in the hallways and all that but when she's with her friends I just avoid her sometimes. WHAT THE FVCK?? Anyone else like this?

Yeah, its common for people in high school. Don't be hard on yourself. It sounds like you're out of state when you're out of your element (in this case, when shes with her friends) - which is a problem 99% of us face... but that doesn't mean you have to stay out of state. I recommend doing some research on getting in state and ways to get there. When you truly get in state, a lot of that nervousness and anxiety vanishes and you should feel confident enough to be yourself and not give a **** around her friends.

At the same time, don't feel obligated to flirt with her whenever she's with her friends. You can just shoot the shyt, you don't always have to impress or say something witty. By doing this, you subconsciously start feeling more comfortable around her friends and you can eventually feel comfortable enough to flirt with her or whatever.
 

CaptainJ

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Makes friends with her friends, this will make things infinitely easier for you. You will feel comfortable around them and be able to act naturally around your girl. They will also make your Girl go crazy for you if they really like you "OMG Chrom3y is so cool and funny, such a good catch blah blah blah"
 

Chrom3y

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Thanks a lot from both of you. Her one friend though I feel really weird around. Im the guy thats like coming out of his shell. And I really only get shy around people who already know Im shy, or places where Im tightly surrounded by people. Other than that Im fine. I dont know what to do but the first step is to TRY to make changes right? This sucks...
 

Brighty

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Chrom3y said:
Thanks a lot from both of you. Her one friend though I feel really weird around. Im the guy thats like coming out of his shell. And I really only get shy around people who already know Im shy, or places where Im tightly surrounded by people. Other than that Im fine. I dont know what to do but the first step is to TRY to make changes right? This sucks...

Dude, I can totally relate to that first bit. I know what's its like to go through so many changes and be around the people who knew the old you. You just have to bite the bullet and try to make these changes. Gradually people will disassociate you with being shy or whatnot once they see the new you.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

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