"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Who's right - me or my friends?

T

The Comeback Kid

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Alright so there's this HB8 I see in school on the last day. I don't really "like" anyone at the moment (although she can be a future possibility ;) ), so I'm just chillin'. However, I do have a pool at my house (girls like pools...or so I hope). I was considering suggesting (in a cool way) she can come over sometime and go in the pool (worse case, I'd just IM her later). Well, she was with a bunch of her friends, something I've been burned by before, so I wasn't exactly going to take that risk.

The debate is what a few of my friends suggested I do: is it good or bad? They wanted me to say "Do you want to come to my pool?...clothing optional."

What do you think of that line? Good or bad? I thought it makes me sound like a perv (one friend actually agrees with me). I'll probably see her online later (she usually IM's me first anyway), so I can just ask her then...in a way that will probably yield results.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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U

undesputable

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are you really that afraid to just say "clothing optional" thats just kinda funny, it wouldnt offend a girl, as long as shes not a prude and she doesnt think youre a loser than its all good. i would even say "nakedness required" but that bc i know my group of friends.
 
G

ghostin

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ya. good idea not goin up to her when she is with her friends. Buy ya, she shouldnt be offended by that little joke, if she is, then her personality might not be much fun to be around.
 
T

The Comeback Kid

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Me and her talk a bit, but I try to avoid being "friends" for that future possibility (hey, it doesn't hurt to have more choices, does it?). I wasn't sure if something like that sounded like the right things to say (or a good thing to say) though. It possibly sounded real DJish though (good), so that's why I posted it here. She is real flirty, so I think it should work if I was to try it.

Any other thoughts on this?
 
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T

The Comeback Kid

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Ah...I forgot the one possible flaw to this whole thing: I am unsure if she has a bf or not.

Now I know that may sound AFC, but the whole thing doesn't work if she has one. Perhaps I fire my attack (the pool thing), and then she'd say she has a bf, if she indeed has one. The reason this would present a problem is because she would most likely not do it if she has a bf. Otherwise, it is clear sailing.

So, again, this is definately a risk, but I think I'm due to take one.
:woo:
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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08aisaac

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If she does have a boyfriend then invite him too. He might actually be pretty cool. Who knows. Or if you don't want to invite him then just say that you don't mind and that you're sure that he won't either.
 
T

The Comeback Kid

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Originally posted by 08aisaac
If she does have a boyfriend then invite him too. He might actually be pretty cool. Who knows. Or if you don't want to invite him then just say that you don't mind and that you're sure that he won't either.
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That's not a bad idea, but it would probably not work here IMO.

If she does have a bf, I would have a pretty good idea who it is. I know him a little bit and get along with him, but I probably wouldn't invite him to this. Why?

It wouldn't feel right - who would want to see the "bf" and the girl making out every three seconds and me standing there alone as a spectator, especially IN MY HOUSE (or on my property, w/e)? I'd be kinda left out and I could never feel real comfortable. It would just be awkward and I'd be the odd man out.

Again, definately not a bad idea though.
 
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