Who's Job Is It To Bring Security To The Relationship?

[Desdinova]

I was thinking about this one yesterday. Women are always whining about how they want men to make them fee secure in the relationship, so men respond with romantic gestures and declarations of love. Of course we know that doesn't work.

But is it really the man's job to bring security to the LTR?

Being at the top of the HSL in my GF's books, I've noticed that it's HER who's working hard at making me feel secure in the relationship. She keeps saying things like "you're stuck with me", "I'm not letting you go", "When we're old..." etc etc. I haven't given any indication that I want to stay with her for the long term.

So that got me thinking that it should be the WOMAN'S job to bring security to the LTR and the man should merely respond with actions.

 

[Von]

Gender roles are getting more blurry every passing year....

Alot of women especially from the Mid-East, are caught in the 60's mentally of ''I am the princess who is provided for but I have to be free''

Western women '' I have to the be the Alpha in the relationship or independant''

It can change with your upbringing of course.

I've found the couple who works the best for your question are, the couple who accept the role...

My parents had that situation.... Dad used to make more money told the Mom to go change her career, she did, now she makes the money and he's a ''stay home dad'' taking care of her.

Basically, like you..... you are feeding her emotional and intellectural needs, she'll provide you the ''financial security. In short, you got beta according to SoSuave

I don't mind having a house wife, I don't want to be a stay home husband (I love working and moving too much thought).... but you have to bring something to the table to make it work.

Gender roles are being mix more and more.... but the rule is the same: A couple must balance each other

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Gender roles are getting more blurry every passing year....

Alot of women especially from the Mid-East, are caught in the 60's mentally of ''I am the princess who is provided for but I have to be free''

Western women '' I have to the be the Alpha in the relationship or independant''

It can change with your upbringing of course.

I've found the couple who works the best for your question are, the couple who accept the role...

My parents had that situation.... Dad used to make more money told the Mom to go change her career, she did, now she makes the money and he's a ''stay home dad'' taking care of her.

Basically, like you..... you are feeding her emotional and intellectural needs, she'll provide you the ''financial security. In short, you got beta according to SoSuave

I don't mind having a house wife, I don't want to be a stay home husband (I love working and moving too much thought).... but you have to bring something to the table to make it work.

Gender roles are being mix more and more.... but the rule is the same: A couple must balance each other

I don't believe "house husband" is a terrible proposition if you keep your SMV raised and do it in a DJ/Gigilo manner. Keep some skills to, possibly have part time engagements. The entire thing brings attention to you from the other ladies and your exploits in the bedroom.

 

[Desdinova]

I wasn't talking about financial security. I was talking about relationship security.

 

[yuppee]

In my experience and a lot of thought spent, any time one partner is doing ALL of any aspect of the relationship, that couple is heading for problems. You'd better be sharing everything.

 

[Alvafe]

I wasn't talking about financial security. I was talking about relationship security.

but desdi, financial security is part of it, lack of money will kill the relatinship the same way as a lack of emotion, and if you ask me both are the ones who should work with, we know pretty well if a female don't invest on you and on the relationship she will go, if a male shower a woman with all that romantic crappy she wil be happy for sometime then she will want something else, like I said before a little balance on what you do is required

 

[oOh Nasty]

Desdinova's main point is that if you ever find yourself trying to work for relationship security, you've got the wrong frame. Sure, you can throw in a little bit of beta game once in awhile to make them feel like they're in some kind of romantic drama, but she should be the one focusing on relationship security.

In my opinion, we should be constantly working on our SMV, even while in monogamous relationships.

We don't "give" women financial security. Women just know in the back of their heads that we're well off enough to not only be able to take care of ourselves, but others as well IF WE SO CHOOSE TO DO SO WITH OUR GRACE.

 

[Desdinova]

Desdinova's main point is that if you ever find yourself trying to work for relationship security, you've got the wrong frame. Sure, you can throw in a little bit of beta game once in awhile to make them feel like they're in some kind of romantic drama, but she should be the one focusing on relationship security.

This was exactly my point.

Here's the way I've been looking at it...

The male is the one who naturally desires to spread his seed all over the damn place. The woman is the one who wants "security". So why shouldn't the woman be the one working to make things "secure" in the relationship?

Financial and Relationship security are two different things. A desirable man will come with financial security. Relationship security can only happen when a male and a female are involved in an exclusive relationship. Because the male has the desire to fvck other women (multiple times per day), the woman should be the one working on making the relationship valuable, meaningful, and beneficial for the male.

Today's women generally don't want to work toward relationship security. They want the man to have financial security and that's it.

 

[Die Hard]

Summed up:

* Be the PRIZE.
* Make women EARN your exclusivity

Maybe you should read the DJ Bible again if these are new concepts to you, Des

 

[Reyaj]

Summed up:

* Be the PRIZE.
* Make women EARN your exclusivity

Maybe you should read the DJ Bible again if these are new concepts to you, Des

come on champ aint so bad.... aint so bad