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BURT MCQUEEN

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I also have a ridiculous f*cking sex drive that sometimes makes me think I might be a sex addict. Although I'm pretty damn picky so I don't just bang any odd woman just because she has a vagina.



I think that's normal
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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I've got a great life overall--great parents, good friends (although they're all married so I practically have no social circle anymore), healthy/keep myself in shape and love lifting weights, great job that pays me well and isn't very stressful, financial independence, etc. However, I'm unhappy most of the time, and I've noticed that my happiness hinges upon women/sex. It's like all I think about anymore. I used to be able to sit at home on the weekends playing video games and be happy, but now if I don't have a date/hangout setup I feel like I'm missing out and wind up feeling depressed. But even when I get "what I want," the feeling is fleeting. The day after hooking up with a chick I'm back on the grind chasing other women, and after two or three days I'm depressed if I haven't set anything up. Actually, setting up dates/hangouts barely helps, because I know women are total bullsh!tters and most will likely flake/ghost spontaneously anyways.

For example, tonight I was supposed to have a chick over (second hookup), but she hasn't responded to a text I sent her this morning. Also texted another girl, who I was talking to last weekend and had a date setup with for Saturday, and she hasn't responded either. Same thing for like 3 others who I've just been BSing with (no dates setup). Thing is, my thought process is "if these girls respond/follow through/meet up I'm happy, and if they don't I'm unhappy."

I also have a ridiculous f*cking sex drive that sometimes makes me think I might be a sex addict. Although I'm pretty damn picky so I don't just bang any odd woman just because she has a vagina.

Feels like I'm having some kind of midlife crisis at 29.
Whats the problem? If you're working at McDonald's,mmake changes.
 

LARaiders85

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I've got a great life overall--great parents, good friends (although they're all married so I practically have no social circle anymore), healthy/keep myself in shape and love lifting weights, great job that pays me well and isn't very stressful, financial independence, etc. However, I'm unhappy most of the time, and I've noticed that my happiness hinges upon women/sex. It's like all I think about anymore. I used to be able to sit at home on the weekends playing video games and be happy, but now if I don't have a date/hangout setup I feel like I'm missing out and wind up feeling depressed. But even when I get "what I want," the feeling is fleeting. The day after hooking up with a chick I'm back on the grind chasing other women, and after two or three days I'm depressed if I haven't set anything up. Actually, setting up dates/hangouts barely helps, because I know women are total bullsh!tters and most will likely flake/ghost spontaneously anyways.

For example, tonight I was supposed to have a chick over (second hookup), but she hasn't responded to a text I sent her this morning. Also texted another girl, who I was talking to last weekend and had a date setup with for Saturday, and she hasn't responded either. Same thing for like 3 others who I've just been BSing with (no dates setup). Thing is, my thought process is "if these girls respond/follow through/meet up I'm happy, and if they don't I'm unhappy."

I also have a ridiculous f*cking sex drive that sometimes makes me think I might be a sex addict. Although I'm pretty damn picky so I don't just bang any odd woman just because she has a vagina.

Feels like I'm having some kind of midlife crisis at 29.
Are you going for a relationship at all?
 

backseatjuan

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Congrads!!

High respects!!

Start your own business. If you can. We all deserve to get rich. You too. Not everyone can run their own business. I have to stick a fcked up story, as a warning to you. This summer dude decided he wanted to rent a cafe and make money. Well, he sucked at it. Kitchen was crap. Place was crap. And more importantly, his approach to situation was crap. He end up with negative profit.

When you start business, “friends” in quotes that word appear. Cuz your SMV thru the roof. Wommen appear, cuz your SMV tru the roof. But none of it is compatible with your goals.

Start business and your focus will shift. Because you had it, you don’t really need it.

What do you want to do? Something that will bring you $500 to $1500 per day.
 
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Korrupt

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Are you going for a relationship at all?
I'd love a relationship. But I'm so picky when it comes to settling down it's almost impossible. The girl would literally have to be my "best ever" (or close) in every aspect. Looks, personality, sex, etc. So instead I "settle" for sex & bullsh!t.
 

stormrider

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Neediness is an epidemic. Unfortunately women cannot fill this void for you. That's what you've been led to believe by Disney and society. At best you will just run into women that are just needy for validation as you are. They will also carry the same void. Two incomplete people does not make one complete person. It makes for a needy and neurotic relationship. Sorry Disney. Noone can complete you but yourself.

The paradigm of health/wealth/relationships is fatally flawed. It should be health/wealth/social life = quality relationships. When you have health/wealth/social life, you become your own ecosystem. You generate your own validation.

A lot of guys work out and have solid careers but when you ask them about their hobbies/passions/social life/social circles, their answer is video games or trolling around the clubs for validation. By law of attraction, you cannot attempt to work on your relationships directly and expect success. Quality relationships are a BY-PRODUCT of having a complete life - and that includes your social life.

You are still an incomplete man. A grown man is supposed to have the social skills to expand his social circles. He is supposed to expand his sphere of influence. He is supposed to create an ecosystem that has women in it. He is supposed to have hobbies and passions that naturally has women in it, not be a complete anti-social troll who's only access to women are OLD and clubs. Dominant men dominate their social environments. They are not nomads. Being a social nomad restricts you of access to resources (including women). So how the hell is this smart?

When you have these things, it is a simple matter of just living your life and the women are there. So where is the need to chase? They are already there when you are doing your daily routine. At that point it is just a matter of being an attractive guy and romance happens. Romance happens in social tribes for hundreds of thousands of years since the beginning of mankind.

Who would you rather hang out with, the guy who knows 100 women or the no life seducer who wants you to be his wingman so you can spend the weekend spam approaching every bar together? I know plenty of no life seducers who do just that. But I usually hang out with the guys who know 100 women who invite me to social gatherings/get-togethers.

This past weekend I was at a creek house by the lake with friends. There were plenty of single women there. I spent the weekend shooting guns, swimming in the lake, drinking whiskey, and just connecting with cool women/people. Even if I went to the clubs, I wouldn't find the same connection/chemistry that is built in between me and the women in my social tribes.

If you are already a cool/attractive guy, 90% of the game is access. It's as simple as that. In this environment, the women chase the cool/attractive guys.

It still baffles my mind how some guys can argue that being a no life seducer approaching 50 women a night is more efficient than networking with one person (who is a gatekeeper) and then having access to 50 women.

Women are tribal creatures. That chick that you are approaching at the bar is already spinning like 5 guys in her social tribes. She is just at the bar to collect validation. This is the reason for 90% of your flakes. She wasn't born yesterday and you are already behind all the guys who have immediate access to her. And that 1 out of 100 time you managed to get laid was because she just got out of some form of relationship and the stars just happened to align.
 
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malz1

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Neediness is an epidemic. Unfortunately women cannot fill this void for you. That's what you've been led to believe by Disney and society. At best you will just run into women that are just needy for validation as you are. They will also carry the same void. Two incomplete people does not make one complete person. It makes for a needy and neurotic relationship. Sorry Disney. Noone can complete you but yourself.

The paradigm of health/wealth/relationships is fatally flawed. It should be health/wealth/social life = quality relationships. When you have health/wealth/social life, you become your own ecosystem. You generate your own validation.

A lot of guys work out and have solid careers but when you ask them about their hobbies/passions/social life/social circles, their answer is video games or trolling around the clubs for validation. By law of attraction, you cannot attempt to work on your relationships directly and expect success. Quality relationships are a BY-PRODUCT of having a complete life - and that includes your social life.

You are still an incomplete man. A grown man is supposed to have the social skills to expand his social circles. He is supposed to expand his sphere of influence. He is supposed to create an ecosystem that has women in it. He is supposed to have hobbies and passions that naturally has women in it, not be a complete anti-social troll who's only access to women are OLD and clubs. Dominant men dominate their social environments. They are not nomads. Being a social nomad restricts you of access to resources (including women). So how the hell is this smart?

When you have these things, it is a simple matter of just living your life and the women are there. So where is the need to chase? They are already there when you are doing your daily routine. At that point it is just a matter of being an attractive guy and romance happens. Romance happens in social tribes for hundreds of thousands of years since the beginning of mankind.

Who would you rather hang out with, the guy who knows 100 women or the no life seducer who wants you to be his wingman so you can spend the weekend spam approaching every bar together? I know plenty of no life seducers who do just that. But I usually hang out with the guys who know 100 women who invite me to social gatherings/get-togethers.

This past weekend I was at a creek house by the lake with friends. There were plenty of single women there. I spent the weekend shooting guns, swimming in the lake, drinking whiskey, and just connecting with cool women/people. Even if I went to the clubs, I wouldn't find the same connection/chemistry that is built in between me and the women in my social tribes.

If you are already a cool/attractive guy, 90% of the game is access. It's as simple as that. In this environment, the women chase the cool/attractive guys.

It still baffles my mind how some guys can argue that being a no life seducer approaching 50 women a night is more efficient than networking with one person (who is a gatekeeper) and then having access to 50 women.

Women are tribal creatures. That chick that you are approaching at the bar is already spinning like 5 guys in her social tribes. She is just at the bar to collect validation. This is the reason for 90% of your flakes. She wasn't born yesterday and you are already behind all the guys who have immediate access to her. And that 1 out of 100 time you managed to get laid was because she just got out of some form of relationship and the stars just happened to align.
Agreed. Social circles make seduction easier in that it gives greater access and preselected approval. I'd add that getting laid often happens without having an ecosystem though. LMS omegas get adopted in her group temporarily for mating. The omega just has to adapt to her groups' customs per say to not get kicked out early.
 

Poonani Maker

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Banged an early 20s gal last night or rather she banged me. Thin but rather spacey pvssy (though my d!ck is not as large as it used to be - aging shrinks?), perfect b-cup t!tties pale. She rode me a long time, I mean, I've never had one (to my recollection) ride me with increasing thrust for that long and I hardly Ever cvm from cowgirl. She was so light probably 100 lbs that I could push up my pelvis higher (I'm in great shape looking my best after 2 months of working out hardcore) and higher (whereas starting out with her on top she and I couldn't get a good groove at all just the mushy back n' forth not much friction). She was WET too VERY wet slobbering down my balls with it. She's from my home state 1000 miles away so same accent same familiarity of upbringing, but thin girls are very temperamental and judgey or uptight, twisty. So I inclined my hips or her "saddle" higher, so she got a better groove, then higher, and higher, and higher her going harder going in and out and all I could think of is her in a fantasy, a taboo, scenario, and on this playing in my mind (in a somewhat uncomfortable position for ME elevated way up to give her the ultimate saddle like riding a mechanical bull at a country western bar) I couldn't help but cvm because I RARELY bone a 130 lbs or less girl these days. It was so easy to provide her a saddle to ride the bull to her heart's content. How can you do that with a fatas5 *****? I guess by strengthening your legs even more. It was a FIRST for me in my sexual experiences. Firsts are so rewarding and add to your arsenal in love-making. She's a smoker, my clothes absorbed the smell wholly. New fvck buddy though we're not really "friends."
 

LARaiders85

Master Don Juan
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Neediness is an epidemic. Unfortunately women cannot fill this void for you. That's what you've been led to believe by Disney and society. At best you will just run into women that are just needy for validation as you are. They will also carry the same void. Two incomplete people does not make one complete person. It makes for a needy and neurotic relationship. Sorry Disney. Noone can complete you but yourself.

The paradigm of health/wealth/relationships is fatally flawed. It should be health/wealth/social life = quality relationships. When you have health/wealth/social life, you become your own ecosystem. You generate your own validation.

A lot of guys work out and have solid careers but when you ask them about their hobbies/passions/social life/social circles, their answer is video games or trolling around the clubs for validation. By law of attraction, you cannot attempt to work on your relationships directly and expect success. Quality relationships are a BY-PRODUCT of having a complete life - and that includes your social life.

You are still an incomplete man. A grown man is supposed to have the social skills to expand his social circles. He is supposed to expand his sphere of influence. He is supposed to create an ecosystem that has women in it. He is supposed to have hobbies and passions that naturally has women in it, not be a complete anti-social troll who's only access to women are OLD and clubs. Dominant men dominate their social environments. They are not nomads. Being a social nomad restricts you of access to resources (including women). So how the hell is this smart?

When you have these things, it is a simple matter of just living your life and the women are there. So where is the need to chase? They are already there when you are doing your daily routine. At that point it is just a matter of being an attractive guy and romance happens. Romance happens in social tribes for hundreds of thousands of years since the beginning of mankind.

Who would you rather hang out with, the guy who knows 100 women or the no life seducer who wants you to be his wingman so you can spend the weekend spam approaching every bar together? I know plenty of no life seducers who do just that. But I usually hang out with the guys who know 100 women who invite me to social gatherings/get-togethers.

This past weekend I was at a creek house by the lake with friends. There were plenty of single women there. I spent the weekend shooting guns, swimming in the lake, drinking whiskey, and just connecting with cool women/people. Even if I went to the clubs, I wouldn't find the same connection/chemistry that is built in between me and the women in my social tribes.

If you are already a cool/attractive guy, 90% of the game is access. It's as simple as that. In this environment, the women chase the cool/attractive guys.

It still baffles my mind how some guys can argue that being a no life seducer approaching 50 women a night is more efficient than networking with one person (who is a gatekeeper) and then having access to 50 women.

Women are tribal creatures. That chick that you are approaching at the bar is already spinning like 5 guys in her social tribes. She is just at the bar to collect validation. This is the reason for 90% of your flakes. She wasn't born yesterday and you are already behind all the guys who have immediate access to her. And that 1 out of 100 time you managed to get laid was because she just got out of some form of relationship and the stars just happened to align.
Ok so I completely agree with this FYI. Why would I want to be in the top 50% of men (online dating), 40% of men (clubs), or 30% of men(day game) when I can be in the top 20% of men in my social scenes or 10% of men in my social circles? However, things aren't necessarily easy there either:


It's funny because in my social circles there is often confusion as to why no one is hooking up even when there is obvious sexual tension lol. It's because people don't necessarily want to deal with the consequences. Also, as you know, there is going to be a lot of ****blocking and reputation smearing in groups like that ESPECIALLY if you are the top guy in the group. However, I still say to go for it and own it if things go south with the girl(s), but you do need to significantly supplement with day game.
 
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stormrider

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Ok so I completely agree with this FYI. Why would I want to be in the top 50% of men (online dating), 40% of men (clubs), or 30% of men(day game) when I can be in the top 20% of men in my social scenes or 10% of men in my social circles? However, things aren't necessarily easy there either:


It's funny because in my social circles there is often confusion as to why no one is hooking up even when there is obvious sexual tension lol. It's because people don't necessarily want to deal with the consequences. Also, as you know, there is going to be a lot of ****blocking and reputation smearing in groups like that ESPECIALLY if you are the top guy in the group. However, I still say to go for it and own it if things go south with the girl(s), but you do need to significantly supplement with day game.
Is this recent? When I was in social circles in SF in 2015 it was women constantly trying to seduce me. It was like a game to them. My ego got so bloated I refused to do day/night game because the difference was like night and day.

If anything it was the opposite of your experience. I’d show up to bars/clubs that were obvious meat markets. The women would play games and act entitled as a way of getting my attention: and I would think to myself “women in my social circles would never undermine my ego like that”. And we would both fail to pull the trigger because of too much pride on either side. She wasn’t submissive enough for me and I wasn’t supplicating enough for her. For her to submit to me would be for her to lose her position of power.

It didn’t matter if it was day game or night game. Every chick seemed to have this annoying sense of pride where she expected guys to chase. And they would use a lower value guy as a pawn to make the dominant guy jealous just so he can chase too. If you came from social circles where you had limitless validation with 0% effort, it is almost impossible to accept the terms of entitled women out in the field.

If people can’t hook up in social circles then that’s pretty much the end of the human race because the average person doesn’t go out and game.

When I go out to clubs, all I see are social circles where people know each other. Trying to infiltrate that leads to nothing but C0ckblocking or getting into a fight with the dominant males of the group.

Here is the in field data of the last 10 times I’ve interacted with women and you tell me if you see a pattern

-got introduced to 5 new women this past weekend through social circles. I was at a creek house by a river in the middle of the woods. Spent the weekend swimming, shooting guns, drinking beer, and flirting with women where I had built in social proof and preselection. It was like a competition to see which girl could grab my attention.

-went to a club with 3 women from my social circles and met another woman because of the social proof I had. Even her friends encouraged her to go for me because they saw I had status. Even they wanted to hang out with me. That usually doesn’t happen when I’m a lone wolf.

-ran into a 9 at a bar where we had instant connection but then the male orbiter came out of the bathroom and c0ckblocked me.

-met another 9 at where we had instant connection but the male orbiter sitting beside her almost got into a fight with me.

-interacted with a group of girls in a bachelorette party where they all c0ckblocked each other and eventually ostrasized me because my presence was causing too much chaos/jealousy.

-actually got opened by a group of college chicks but they eventually left me because I would give attention to one girl and another girl would c0ckblock. This seems to be a theme when interacting with a group of women outside my circles. When things get too chaotic they all block each other and drop the nomadic male to maintain group cohesiveness and comraderie.

-got C0ckblocked by my own friends in a bar.

-got baited by a 9 to approach her. When I finally did, she had this vibe where she was expecting me to entertain her. I left and another chump showed up and spent all night supplicating to her only to end up going home alone.

-met a chick at my gym. It was instant attraction and connection and we just vibed. This is the most solid connection I’ve had the past year. And it always seem to happen when I am doing things and the woman happens to exist in my social environment. In other words, I am not going out looking for it (which rarely works). This was like the first serendipity moment I’ve had this year aside from the creek house.

-met some random chicks at the clubs that i don’t remember.

So you see, the past 10 times I’ve gamed, every good thing that happened to me happened because I was either in a social circle and got introduced with built in social proof, was able to leverage women in my social circles to create social proof and attracted more women, or met women in my social environment where I was already doing something. The women are just part of my ecosystem.

But outside my ecosystem, it was nothing but frustration. Attractive women, in my experience, simply do not show up in the sexual meat market and just wait for you to make them submit to you. There is either a c0ckblocking loyal guard or the women c0ckblock each other, or just plain bad luck.

This is just a small sample size but the pattern is always the same. Within my ecosystem it’s instant connection with no c0ckblocking. Outside my ecosystem is complete chaos.
 
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Poonani Maker

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I will fight a dude who has a problem with me, steps on my foot or gets in my way. I don't want to, but I'm a free man and if she has no problem with me talking to her, HE had better not have a problem with me talking to her. I hate bullies.
 

BJP1991

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I've got a great life overall--great parents, good friends (although they're all married so I practically have no social circle anymore), healthy/keep myself in shape and love lifting weights, great job that pays me well and isn't very stressful, financial independence, etc. However, I'm unhappy most of the time, and I've noticed that my happiness hinges upon women/sex. It's like all I think about anymore. I used to be able to sit at home on the weekends playing video games and be happy, but now if I don't have a date/hangout setup I feel like I'm missing out and wind up feeling depressed. But even when I get "what I want," the feeling is fleeting. The day after hooking up with a chick I'm back on the grind chasing other women, and after two or three days I'm depressed if I haven't set anything up. Actually, setting up dates/hangouts barely helps, because I know women are total bullsh!tters and most will likely flake/ghost spontaneously anyways.

For example, tonight I was supposed to have a chick over (second hookup), but she hasn't responded to a text I sent her this morning. Also texted another girl, who I was talking to last weekend and had a date setup with for Saturday, and she hasn't responded either. Same thing for like 3 others who I've just been BSing with (no dates setup). Thing is, my thought process is "if these girls respond/follow through/meet up I'm happy, and if they don't I'm unhappy."

I also have a ridiculous f*cking sex drive that sometimes makes me think I might be a sex addict. Although I'm pretty damn picky so I don't just bang any odd woman just because she has a vagina.

Feels like I'm having some kind of midlife crisis at 29.
Man, this feels all to familiar. 28yo male here, and I'm in the same rut as you are.

15 months ago, my gf of 4.5 years cheated on me and the relationship ended abruptly. I thought I was going to end up marrying this girl. Needless to say, the transition from that state of mind to a single, freshly cheated on man is a stark difference, that took time adjusting to.

Over a year later, I still feel like I am filling a void with dating new women, using OLD apps constantly to find new dates and girls to meet and spend time with. Obviously, my game and dating skills have sharpened immensely because of this, however I still feel the same void. It happens all too often where I meet a girl I like, go on a few dates, start hooking up, but the morning after they leave, there is this "emptiness" I feel, and when I cannot fill it with my hobbies or passions, the cycle starts all over again.

At the recommendation of a friend, I made an appointment with a mental health counselor. This felt like a low-point for me, because I want to believe I can correct my path without the need of others, but I want to give it a try at least.

For me, what makes it harder is going on a good first date, only to be rejected when I go asking for a second date. This just makes me dive deeper into OLD apps and line up date, after date, after date. Sometimes multiple nights in a row. For example, last week I went out on dates 5 days in a row...by the third one in, I honestly felt drained and like I wasn't giving a true representation of myself for the 4th and 5th dates I went on.

I think what I need to remember, and we all need to, is that we are "worth it", in life. Meaning you deserve all the good things you want and have earned. Myself, I have a hard time letting go of the validation-seeking (through getting dates and hooking up), and I have a hard time thinking it doesn't have something to do with the way my last long-term relationship ended.

Any articles or links from the bible that are directly related to this that anyone knows of?

Thanks yall
 

John9999

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I've got a great life overall--great parents, good friends (although they're all married so I practically have no social circle anymore), healthy/keep myself in shape and love lifting weights, great job that pays me well and isn't very stressful, financial independence, etc. However, I'm unhappy most of the time, and I've noticed that my happiness hinges upon women/sex. It's like all I think about anymore. I used to be able to sit at home on the weekends playing video games and be happy, but now if I don't have a date/hangout setup I feel like I'm missing out and wind up feeling depressed. But even when I get "what I want," the feeling is fleeting. The day after hooking up with a chick I'm back on the grind chasing other women, and after two or three days I'm depressed if I haven't set anything up. Actually, setting up dates/hangouts barely helps, because I know women are total bullsh!tters and most will likely flake/ghost spontaneously anyways.

For example, tonight I was supposed to have a chick over (second hookup), but she hasn't responded to a text I sent her this morning. Also texted another girl, who I was talking to last weekend and had a date setup with for Saturday, and she hasn't responded either. Same thing for like 3 others who I've just been BSing with (no dates setup). Thing is, my thought process is "if these girls respond/follow through/meet up I'm happy, and if they don't I'm unhappy."

I also have a ridiculous f*cking sex drive that sometimes makes me think I might be a sex addict. Although I'm pretty damn picky so I don't just bang any odd woman just because she has a vagina.

Feels like I'm having some kind of midlife crisis at 29.
I agree. I spend way too much time on getting women. I’m basically over it.
 

Glassguy

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@BeExcellent

Sorry to hear it didnt work out on your relationship. I know you did a little bit of everything to make it work
 
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LARaiders85

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Is this recent? When I was in social circles in SF in 2015 it was women constantly trying to seduce me. It was like a game to them. My ego got so bloated I refused to do day/night game because the difference was like night and day.
I would say it is recent yeah. I'm not saying that your description is wrong by the way, it just doesn't seem AS good as it used to be in social circles.
 
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