Who here wants to get married and why?

[Fzatf]

I've been married and it ended by her choice. I know first hand that marriage is not forever and the vows don't really mean much. However, I would get married again if the right girl came around and it was something she really wanted. Though based on the risk I would advise other men not to marry without at least being aware of the potential consequences.

 

[That_dude]

I've been married and it ended by her choice. I know first hand that marriage is not forever and the vows don't really mean much. However, I would get married again if the right girl came around and it was something she really wanted. Though based on the risk I would advise other men not to marry without at least being aware of the potential consequences.

Bingo. For some it works. The other 50% are ending in divorce. Be aware and try to make the best decision possible

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

And for those considering marriage: make sure that she always makes at least as much money as you do. If not, you are setting yourself up to be someone's slave via alimony for years.

Another thing to consider: In many states, once $1 of alimony is granted, at any time your ex can sue you again for modification of alimony. Even if she doesn't have a valid case, if she hires a lawyer, you will be forced to defend yourself. So even if you "win", it still costs you money.

And last but not least, there is "imputed" income. You might be wondering WTF that means. What it means is if you make a lot of money, you can't just change careers to a lower paying job. You also can't retire. If you do, the court can decide that you have intentionally under employed yourself, so they will "impute" that you can make X amount of money. And the amount of alimony you pay is based on the imputed amount, not how much you actually earn.

So for the guys here that think they can mitigate the potential hazards of family court, make sure you have iron clad strategies in place to prevent what is mentioned above.

-Augustus-

 

[guru1000]

Yes, I'm leaving it because I think all that was needed to be said, has been said.



Okay so your theory is that the woman is still single/not married because she hasn't found a good candidate to fulfill the marriage role yet? Just think for a minute Guru......you said the woman is extremely HOT and has all of these great internal qualities which include coming from great familial networks that demand her to maintain certain aspects of traditionalism.

Would NOT this woman be getting scores of guys lined up to date her Guru? So she's 25 - 28, are you honestly telling me this woman has not had at least 10 SOLID candidates who have came into her life up until that point, that she could have did this marriage thing with if she wanted to? Remember, you said her family has programmed this into her and they also in some form or fashion are pressuring her to enter said arrangement as well, correct? So with 10 SOLID candidates, how is it that she didn't pick one of them?

Are you sure this isn't a "Bush Daughters" type of situation? You know, they come from tradition, come from a strong network, their parents and grandparents remained married.....but the Bush Daughters wanted to go out and party, fvck, svck, etc., then WAIT to settle down once they got older. Are you SURE the chick you are describing isn't a Jenna Bush??

I can't speak for all, but those whom I dated within this culture typically:

1) Starting dating later;
2) Had 1 or 2 LT bfs, which didn't work out; as the exes were physically abusive bf, mentally-abusive bf, alcoholic bf, gambling bf, unambitious bf, incongruent religious beliefs, cheating bf, non-committing bf, etc.

It's really a silly question as to why they didn't marry right away. Relations with the wrong people (for you) happen very often for myriad reasons. Just because a girl is beautiful and cultured does not mean that every guy will treat her right and marry her early. Actually, guys like me getting into LTRs with women like them are the reason why they're still single. As a high-value man with many options, it is rather hard to stay with one women, treat her well, and want to marry her.

To be honest with you, I have a great time being single. Sure replacing harems intermittently every few months can be a bit draining, but the novelty of new pvzzy among the most beautiful in the world is a high that cannot be achieved in a marriage. So even, as I write in this thread, I, myself, am not 100% sold on getting married ... but I'm open to it as a possibility one day. I try to stay fluid and not be so concrete in any belief, convention, dogma, system. This enables me to open to the world and allows the universe to direct me to my next lesson--and not hit me over the head because I'm a stubborn fool.

Also, how does she manage to fall for the triple header play from POF?

Haha, I don't think women like this frequent POF.

@Augustus_McCrae: Very true. You cannot avoid imputation of income (though it can be mitigated through a prenup as long as it's jurisdictionally "fair", so invest carefully into the spousal maintenance section of the contract), as opposing counsel can subpoena your bills and credit card statements, determine how much you spend based on your monthly expenditures, and order spousal maintenance in accordance.

For low-income earners, find high-income earners.

For high-income earners, I would recommend not only to hire a seasoned attorney, but subscribe to Westlaw for a few months, read all the appellate cases of your state, and write the "spousal maintenance" section of the prenup within the context of the most recent superseding case law, as it relates to "fair" maintenance. Then hire a seasoned attorney to read, advise, and revise.

Unless you're spending $1,000/hr on a Top 10 law firm attorney (but even then), I encourage all to do their own due diligence of the jurisdictional law governing the prenup.

 

[That_dude]

And for those considering marriage: make sure that she always makes at least as much money as you do. If not, you are setting yourself up to be someone's slave via alimony for years.

Another thing to consider: In many states, once $1 of alimony is granted, at any time your ex can sue you again for modification of alimony. Even if she doesn't have a valid case, if she hires a lawyer, you will be forced to defend yourself. So even if you "win", it still costs you money.

And last but not least, there is "imputed" income. You might be wondering WTF that means. What it means is if you make a lot of money, you can't just change careers to a lower paying job. You also can't retire. If you do, the court can decide that you have intentionally under employed yourself, so they will "impute" that you can make X amount of money. And the amount of alimony you pay is based on the imputed amount, not how much you actually earn.

So for the guys here that think they can mitigate the potential hazards of family court, make sure you have iron clad strategies in place to prevent what is mentioned above.

-Augustus-

Ouch. And the reality is.. Some broads will have 0 sympathy when there taking you to the cleaners. Even if they've moved on with Chad Thundercock.. Some will still gladly take everything they can out of the deal Ask some guys who've been divorced. Some hate the family courts with a passion I hardly ever, if ever hear any stories where the role is reversed.

 

[Tenacity]

I can't speak for all, but those whom I dated within this culture typically:

1) Starting dating later;
2) Had 1 or 2 LT bfs, which didn't work out; as the exes were physically abusive bf, mentally-abusive bf, alcoholic bf, gambling bf, unambitious bf, incongruent religious beliefs, cheating bf, non-committing bf, etc.

Haha, I don't think women like this frequent POF.
.

Dude, I seriously think you are being duped. Whomever these women are, they have "sold" you on the notion of them being "different than the average American chick" and you have bought it hook, line, and sinker. Again, Guru, think for a minute man.....

- How do you know how many dudes she's slept with? If a woman has slept with 10 plus guys, do you think she would TELL you this, especially if she's trying to put forth a particular "image" so someone can buy into a notion that she's "super quality"?

- How do you know how many BFs she had?

- How do you know the relationship break-ups were ALL the dude's fault, and the little princess had nothing to do with any of it?

You are on this new campaign to promote marriage, based on these chicks selling you this notion of them being significantly "different", when I have heard the same LINES before from Tyquesha, Ronisha, Laquisha, and any other "-isha" every single time they are looking to "settle down". It's the same shyt and you have been duped.

It's really a silly question as to why they didn't marry right away.

NO it's not. A HB8 plus with no kids, decent finances, and a good family network is getting hit on a shyt load of times everywhere she goes. You aren't telling me this woman hasn't had 10 solid candidates Guru. You aren't telling me that. You just have been sold a bill of goods and are being duped into thinking these chicks are anything "special". They seem just like the Bush Daughters to me, which are the typical WH0RES up until they get into their mid 20's or early 30's and are looking to settle down......then all of a sudden, the bytch becomes a Catholic Nun with supposedly only 1 sex partner her entire life.

 

[guru1000]

Dude, I seriously think you are being duped. Whomever these women are, they have "sold" you on the notion of them being "different than the average American chick" and you have bought it hook, line, and sinker. Again, Guru, think for a minute man.....

- How do you know how many dudes she's slept with? If a woman has slept with 10 plus guys, do you think she would TELL you this, especially if she's trying to put forth a particular "image" so someone can buy into a notion that she's "super quality"?

- How do you know how many BFs she had?

- How do you know the relationship break-ups were ALL the dude's fault, and the little princess had nothing to do with any of it?

You are on this new campaign to promote marriage, based on these chicks selling you this notion of them being significantly "different", when I have heard the same LINES before from Tyquesha, Ronisha, Laquisha, and any other "-isha" every single time they are looking to "settle down". It's the same shyt and you have been duped.NO it's not. A HB8 plus with no kids, decent finances, and a good family network is getting hit on a shyt load of times everywhere she goes. You aren't telling me this woman hasn't had 10 solid candidates Guru. You aren't telling me that. You just have been sold a bill of goods and are being duped into thinking these chicks are anything "special". They seem just like the Bush Daughters to me, which are the typical WH0RES up until they get into their mid 20's or early 30's and are looking to settle down......then all of a sudden, the bytch becomes a Catholic Nun with supposedly only 1 sex partner her entire life.

Her past is irrelevant. Her pitch of who she is is irrelevant. Her XYZ is irrelevant.

You are marrying statistically.

What is relevant besides the statistical success of marriage within her culture is your desire for her and compatibility.

 

[Tenacity]

Her past is irrelevant. Her pitch of who she is is irrelevant. Her XYZ is irrelevant.

WOWWWW. Just WOWWW

 

[That_dude]

I can't speak for all, but those whom I dated within this culture typically:

1) Starting dating later;
2) Had 1 or 2 LT bfs, which didn't work out; as the exes were physically abusive bf, mentally-abusive bf, alcoholic bf, gambling bf, unambitious bf, incongruent religious beliefs, cheating bf, non-committing bf, etc.

It's really a silly question as to why they didn't marry right away. Relations with the wrong people (for you) happen very often for myriad reasons. Just because a girl is beautiful and cultured does not mean that every guy will treat her right and marry her early. Actually, guys like me getting into LTRs with women like them are the reason why they're still single. As a high-value man with many options, it is rather hard to stay with one women, treat her well, and want to marry her.

To be honest with you, I have a great time being single. Sure replacing harems intermittently every few months can be a bit draining, but the novelty of new pvzzy among the most beautiful in the world is a high that cannot be achieved in a marriage. So even, as I write in this thread, I, myself, am not 100% sold on getting married ... but I'm open to it as a possibility one day. I try to stay fluid and not be so concrete in any belief, convention, dogma, system. This enables me to open to the world and allows the universe to direct me to my next lesson--and not hit me over the head because I'm a stubborn fool.

Haha, I don't think women like this frequent POF.

@Augustus_McCrae: Very true. You cannot avoid imputation of income (though it can be mitigated through a prenup as long as it's jurisdictionally "fair", so invest carefully into the spousal maintenance section of the contract), as opposing counsel can subpoena your bills and credit card statements, determine how much you spend based on your monthly expenditures, and order spousal maintenance in accordance.

For low-income earners, find high-income earners.

For high-income earners, I would recommend not only to hire a seasoned attorney, but subscribe to Westlaw for a few months, read all the appellate cases of your state, and write the "spousal maintenance" section of the prenup within the context of the most recent superseding case law, as it relates to "fair" maintenance. Then hire a seasoned attorney to read, advise, and revise.

Unless you're spending $1,000/hr on a Top 10 law firm attorney (but even then), I encourage all to do their own due diligence of the jurisdictional law governing the prenup.

A girl is a girl is a girl from any culture. Some might be more traditional and old fashion to your liking. More family orientated. Doesn't mean you won't run into problems with them too though

 

[Tenacity]

Her past is irrelevant. Her pitch of who she is is irrelevant. Her XYZ is irrelevant.

You are marrying statistically.

What is relevant besides the statistical success of marriage within her culture is your desire for her and compatibility.

Ladies and gentlemen this man has went from telling us that these women are special Unicorns, to NOW telling us that in their Past they could have very well been WH0RES (like the Bush Daughters) but just as long as they come from "tradition" and have some sort of desire for "tradition", then they are good .

- So this entire thing has played out right in front of your very eyes, proving that there are NO unicorns.

- Guru's "special woman" is nothing but a chick that has rode the dyck roller coaster up until age 25 - 32, when she decides she's ready to "settle down" and will promote her image as being the wholesome girl. Nothing special, nothing new, nothing quality, nothing unicorn-ish, just typical AMERICAN market wh0re. Which again, she's great for a short term dating/non-legal relationship, but to "wife" that up? Lmaooo

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

I can't speak for all, but those whom I dated within this culture typically:

1) Starting dating later;
2) Had 1 or 2 LT bfs, which didn't work out; as the exes were physically abusive bf, mentally-abusive bf, alcoholic bf, gambling bf, unambitious bf, incongruent religious beliefs, cheating bf, non-committing bf, etc.

It's really a silly question as to why they didn't marry right away. Relations with the wrong people (for you) happen very often for myriad reasons. Just because a girl is beautiful and cultured does not mean that every guy will treat her right and marry her early. Actually, guys like me getting into LTRs with women like them are the reason why they're still single. As a high-value man with many options, it is rather hard to stay with one women, treat her well, and want to marry her.

To be honest with you, I have a great time being single. Sure replacing harems intermittently every few months can be a bit draining, but the novelty of new pvzzy among the most beautiful in the world is a high that cannot be achieved in a marriage. So even, as I write in this thread, I, myself, am not 100% sold on getting married ... but I'm open to it as a possibility one day. I try to stay fluid and not be so concrete in any belief, convention, dogma, system. This enables me to open to the world and allows the universe to direct me to my next lesson--and not hit me over the head because I'm a stubborn fool.

Haha, I don't think women like this frequent POF.

@Augustus_McCrae: Very true. You cannot avoid imputation of income (though it can be mitigated through a prenup as long as it's jurisdictionally "fair", so invest carefully into the spousal maintenance section of the contract), as opposing counsel can subpoena your bills and credit card statements, determine how much you spend based on your monthly expenditures, and order spousal maintenance in accordance.

For low-income earners, find high-income earners.

For high-income earners, I would recommend not only to hire a seasoned attorney, but subscribe to Westlaw for a few months, read all the appellate cases of your state, and write the "spousal maintenance" section of the prenup within the context of the most recent superseding case law, as it relates to "fair" maintenance. Then hire a seasoned attorney to read, advise, and revise.

Unless you're spending $1,000/hr on a Top 10 law firm attorney (but even then), I encourage all to do their own due diligence of the jurisdictional law governing the prenup.

If a girl tells you her ex was "physically abusive" or "mentally abusive", that is a potential red flag my friend.

-Augustus-

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

WOWWWW. Just WOWWW

Agreed 100% with tenacity here.

Seriously, "Her past is irrelevant"? You're joking right? LMFAO

-Augustus-

 

[guru1000]

Not too sharp Tenacity. Quick recap:

1) Girl states she had one or two ex bfs;
2) Tenacity states, “I don’t believe her.”
3) Guru states it’s irrelevant (whether you believe her as the discussion is not about Tenacity’s belief, which would be cynical irrespectively, in the girl’s past but the statistical chance of a marriage working based on her culture, which encompasses certain social and structural indoctrination of familial/marital values).

 

[guru1000]

If a girl tells you her ex was "physically abusive" or "mentally abusive", that is a potential red flag my friend.

-Augustus-

I can be abusive my friend, so I can understand.But yes, it takes two to tango.

 

[guru1000]

Agreed 100% with tenacity here.

Seriously, "Her past is irrelevant"? You're joking right? LMFAO

-Augustus-

Are you stating (to the degree of LMFAO) that the specific number of exclusive relations that a girl has had holds greater significance to a marriage’s success rate than her social and biblical indoctrinated views on marriage?

Though this wasn’t my position, but since you brought it up, explain.

 

[Urbanyst]

And for some of you older DJs reading this, I date 15-20 years younger and will continue to date women in their 20s into my 50s (hopefully), assuming I do not LTR.

Me too. Found some common ground here lol.

I REFUSE to "date" anyone over 30. This is my policy for the foreseeable future.

I've have 30+ women come onto me sometimes and ask me how I can be such a "catch" and still be single. I always tell them I'm focusing on my career and my girlfriend is focusing on her first year in college.

 

[Dash Riprock]

Her past is irrelevant. Her pitch of who she is is irrelevant. Her XYZ is irrelevant.

NOTHING could be further from the truth. The leopard never changes its spots. People don't magically "change." Don't be blind.

 

[That_dude]

If a girl tells you her ex was "physically abusive" or "mentally abusive", that is a potential red flag my friend.

-Augustus-

You might be onto something. I dated a couple girls that told me this. The relationships were REALLY fd up. Please explain the potential red flag?

 

[Dash Riprock]

Are you stating (to the degree of LMFAO) that the specific number of exclusive relations that a girl has had holds greater significance to a marriage’s success rate than her social and biblical indoctrinated views on marriage?

Though this wasn’t my position, but since you brought it up, explain.

If a women has a history of going through men and boyfriends like Kleenex, why on earth do you think she'll stick with you for 20-30 years? Even 5? Because she was struck by lightening and magically just transformed into another totally different person?

Seriously?!

You're going to be the guy we hear about whose ex wife took him to the cleaners because he was "lovestruck" and totally blind to who she really was despite 100-foot red flags.

 

[guru1000]

NOTHING could be further from the truth. The leopard never changes its spots. People don't magically "change." Don't be blind.

Agreed. However you read out of context. Just add [to our specific argument] to each of those sentences.

The argument is the influence lifelong social and biblical indoctrination can effect on a marriage’s success rate. Anything you would like to add to the argument, other than don’t get married or people don’t change?