"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

where to fvck her?

Big Eee Zee

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 14, 2005
Messages
584
Reaction score
1
Age
39
Location
sweetville
dont say the poop chute.

Anyways, my g/f of a long while recently made the decision she doesnt want to "do things" at her house anymore. Simply because her memories as a child, its strange, we have to sneak around etc, female bull****. And my parents are always home, so thats out. And we both can NOT afford a place. So, i need some locations to do her at, namely for the summer. I've already done dock, boat, car, field, bench etc. Is there anything good im forgetting? Outside is ok, but i rather like the indoors too. Can you guys think of ANYTHING im forgetting?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

biker_gixxer

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 3, 2004
Messages
688
Reaction score
0
Try a friends house...
 

I'm Joe Dirt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 7, 2005
Messages
667
Reaction score
4
Location
Chicago, IL
Fitting rooms at a clothing store? That would be okay for a quickie I suppose since if you stay in there a long time they'll think you're stealing something.

I would say ask a friend to let you use his place. Promise him you won't do it on his/her bed and pay him a couple of bucks, maybe like $10 or $20 or something. That way its cheaper than a place.

Have you really looked into motels though? If you schedule ahead of time or if you go to a really cheap one you can get a room for like $50 or so per night, and that comes with cable tv!!! I suppose if you can't get any for a while, this would be a good solution every now and then, but otherwise keep trying to find places for free.
 

Climax

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 2, 2004
Messages
2,329
Reaction score
5
hmm...

Go for a picnic type thing where there is no-one around, bring some candles along, maybe some soft music in the background, a nice fold up mattress or a thick blanket, and u should be set;) .. And the best thing is, is that there is ALWAYS somewhere to go for a "picnic" at:D


Laterz...
 

MacAvoy

Banned
Joined
May 10, 2003
Messages
2,940
Reaction score
35
Location
Northern Ontario
public washrooms, but an older friends place would work best for you. Why can't you do her in your room with the door closed when your parents are home? Also, I wouldn't give up entirely on her place, you just need to get her attention away from her memories, don't talk, just get her focussed solely on her enjoyment of what your doing to her.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Desdinova

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2004
Messages
11,680
Reaction score
4,877
I had sex with my parents home. We did the same thing with her. No biggie when your bedroom is on a different floor.

How about getting a used SUV and throw a mattress in the back of it? It was a lot of fun when I did that!
 

Climax

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 2, 2004
Messages
2,329
Reaction score
5
Did i see right? ... *lol* ...

Desdinova said:
I had sex with my parents
:eek::eek::eek:






















































:crackup::D:D:crackup:



Sorry, just had to do that:whistle:


Laterz...
 

DJsparky

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 1, 2006
Messages
155
Reaction score
5
fvck her in the pussi were do you think man :p anwyays joking aside, book a motel or something, behind a bush, anywere ! use your creativity
 

Climax

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 2, 2004
Messages
2,329
Reaction score
5
Desdinova said:
Well, at least I didn't have sex with your parents. Your dad might actually like me :D
lol... yeah.... especially when you wear that tight pink top and that "manly" G-string;) ... *G*

:rockon:


Laterz...
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Big Eee Zee

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 14, 2005
Messages
584
Reaction score
1
Age
39
Location
sweetville
yeah, i like the picnic thing

and i dont need a friends house, i can find a place, i dont want this to affect my friends. Bros before hos man. and the SUV idea is good, i've been meaning to get a ****ty jeep for commuting to school, now i have two reasons.


And dont worry, im definately working on getting her de-sensitized to all her memories. Its just a lot of work, shes so emotional.

But you all know about that...
 
Top