Where do I go from here....

[exwhyzee]

Here is the story-
I met this girl through a mutual friend, we spent a lot of time talking via AOL and phone conversations. She made it very clear that she really wanted to come meet me (she lives about 2 hours away from my school) and it was looking really good. We continued our conversations over Winter break, and then as I was heading back to school in late January she stopped calling, and I could not get ahold of her. So I tried to contact her school etc (kinda stalkerish, but I was legimatly worried about her). Then one day out of the blue she singed on AOL and told me that her mother got in a horrible car accident, nearly died, and has been in the ICU for the last 2 weeks. So she is staying home this semester with her family, understandable. Then over the last week she has been sending me mixed signals, like shell tell me stuff like "I think I love you" or "I wish I could kiss you, because then I would know that I have kissed the bestest guy in the world"and then say she is going to call and doesnt. As much as I want to move in and really meet her (which I am yet to do face to face) I know she is really in a tough jam at home with her family situation and all. So basically I have been letting her come to me I havent been too proactive b/c of her situation and b/c when I do she confuses me. So basically I'm wondering what I should do with this chick, w/out forgetting about her.

I'll admit that I am waiting on her, and not really seeking out women-A big mistake, but I feel like we have gotten as close as possible w/out actually meeting. I was considering sending flowers to cheer her up, but I thought it would come off as too needy.(sendin presents to someone u havent met face to face)

Any help will be greatly appreciated.
Thanks

 

[wind20mph]

My suggestion is ask her out. spend time to gether. Do something like Great experince, just enjoy her company, don't tell her you like her or something, you'll end up sinking in a "friend first myth". So just ask her out and have fun. make it as it was the happiest experience with her company. and don't wait for the upportunity. Grab it.

 

[exwhyzee]

Asking her out is not going to be hard, shes already asked me to come visit her in NYC, I live in Boston and I'm not sure if I should just go down and try to spit game on this chick with her family crisis and all.

Also she mentioned she and her friends might come up and visit, how would you suggest I deal with the other two, so I can isolate my girl.

Thanks

 

[wind20mph]

If that would be the case then why don't you fix something up by asking her to come into your place. Like "hey i am free this _____ day so why don't you drop by and I'll show you around." then have a plan. Be interesting.

 

[exwhyzee]

I just sort of feel that if she comes up with some friends and I take her around the town, it would be more of a friendly thing to do. Almost all give and no get for me....Very difficult to make a move, you could also say its just watering the seeds but I do not want to fall into the 'friend' trap.

Any suggestions to keep myself from falling in the 'friend trap'?

Also what do you think about the idea of me visiting her?

And any do's or don'ts in general in this situation?





Thanks