"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

When your mind pulls you in two different directions...

squirrels

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 15, 2003
Messages
6,620
Reaction score
186
Age
47
Location
A universe...where heartbreak and sadness have bee
It's Friday, and I'm of a split mind.

One half of me wants to go out to some bar/club, have a few drinks, chase some tail.

The other half knows that it's a hopeless endevaor...even if I get laid, she won't "measure up" for anything more than a f**k buddy...it wants me to just sit here and wait for death...maybe speed the process along with a bullet.

So right now I'm thinking of striking a compromise between the two halves and playing video games.

Am I getting old?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Jitterbug

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 12, 2008
Messages
3,197
Reaction score
140
No, you're not old.

Your thought process has all the hallmarks of a young man stuck somewhere between youth and maturity. The main one is the overdramatisation of a simple decision process of going out on a Friday night, by creating two unlikely extremes that you, the protagonist, have to choose from, or else... (no the world isn't going to end).

When you get "old", you will make a simple choice and be comfortable with it.
 

EA Gold

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Feb 26, 2009
Messages
410
Reaction score
13
Location
Monaco
I understand where you are coming from, I've been in this situation too.

I know this maybe a little difficult but I may suggest you write a list of goal in your life and also start a journal. Cause if you keep doing the same thing over and over changing your mind here and there. 7 years later you'll end up at the same place you are right now.

I know its difficult but you have understand that compensating lack of goals and direction in life with multiple actions is not going to turn out the way you want it to. There's not enough time in the day for actions to make right the decision we regret that were made months or years ago.

If you don't know what to do then don't do anything because if you make a decision and act from a state of desperation or lack then you will have to make another action to compensate for that action and then for that action and cycle continues over and over.

Then a few years later at the end, you end up in regret and feeling guilty for what happened. The truth is if you were clear about what you wanted and were to let go of the past and the future, your goals would be in your hands right now. I've heard that just 17 seconds of pure thought without contradiction equals about 2000 hours worth of actions. The thought sounds like a better deal to me :)

Tip, cut out some pictures of what you want and focus on those all day. Be thankful for where you are and also if your goals were attained, also appreciate the people around, your family :) You will be a success my friend, by the way your young forever :D

Life and the World around us is an adventure. Knowing about who created Life and the World would make life more meaningful.
 

Ease

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 23, 2009
Messages
1,320
Reaction score
51
I dont think this has anything to do with age. I get stuck in similiar thoughts sometimes.

I met a new girl under strange circumstances. We spent the day together. A 9, funny, feminine, cute. I didnt hook up with her, nor does it look likely that i will at the moment, but it's motivated me. Simply the fact that i ran into this girl who was so attractive to me in the most unexpected and ordinary of places made me feel alive again. If i hadn't been **** blocked, unable to make a move and busy with other issues i would have been all over that.

I get into thinking that there are no good prospects out there for me. I've been pulling below relationship material too long, but its reminded me its possible again. I am mad up for chasing tail right now.
 
Top