"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
When you hit your lowest point in life
- Thread starter Leaf
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Infern0
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 11, 2015
- Messages
- 1,637
- Reaction score
- 1,462
By understanding how you got there.
Realize the mistakes you made, then figure out why you made them.
I hit rock bottom July 22nd 2014, I will never forget the date, it was the date my bpd ex utterly broke me. I had a nervous breakdown and fell into a depression that lasted over 2 months, I truly felt i'd lost everything.
The only way out of there was to come to understand that I was responsible for the decisions I made that lead me there, and that there were underlying problems that caused me to make those bad decisions.
If you can do that, and you can learn that skill of how to "review" your choices and decisions, you'll never end up there again.
Realize the mistakes you made, then figure out why you made them.
I hit rock bottom July 22nd 2014, I will never forget the date, it was the date my bpd ex utterly broke me. I had a nervous breakdown and fell into a depression that lasted over 2 months, I truly felt i'd lost everything.
The only way out of there was to come to understand that I was responsible for the decisions I made that lead me there, and that there were underlying problems that caused me to make those bad decisions.
If you can do that, and you can learn that skill of how to "review" your choices and decisions, you'll never end up there again.
AllDay85
Senior Don Juan
Go to YouTube and watch Joe Rogan - rethink your life and joe rogan - superhero
Mot1veProgress
Banned
- Joined
- Jan 18, 2016
- Messages
- 199
- Reaction score
- 91
- Age
- 34
By realizing life will test you and that every lesson you learn has it's importance.. And that you should regret nothing because nothing happens without reason.."What doesn't kill you makes you stronger". Bad experience is still experience. It makes you realize the good you've been missing out on. It's much easier to do right when you know the consequences of doing wrong. Now you can make better choices that lead to good experiences.
"I GET KNOCKED OUT, BUT I GET UP AGAIN! YOU"RE NEVER GONNA KEEP ME DOWN" <-- Good song to play in your head when you feel regret/failure (Chumbawumba - Tubthumping)
"I GET KNOCKED OUT, BUT I GET UP AGAIN! YOU"RE NEVER GONNA KEEP ME DOWN" <-- Good song to play in your head when you feel regret/failure (Chumbawumba - Tubthumping)
Floydispink01
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 30, 2015
- Messages
- 218
- Reaction score
- 210
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
parkthebus
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 6, 2015
- Messages
- 500
- Reaction score
- 148
- Age
- 39
Do whatawhatakes you happy. Look at what has worked in the past and try to replicate it or make it even better in the present day. Find some passions. Give yourself something to look forward to. Socialize any way possible, even if its just family. Give yourself life goals and more importantly, financial goals as youll be working towards these at least 40 hours a week anyway (provided you work). Break bad habits like watching loads of TV, excessive masturbation and drugs. Start new ones like grooming yourself well, excersizing, presenting yourself to the best of your ability, reading, meditating, studying, martial arts, sports, learning an instrument keeping your personal space clean. You have to sit down and right down everything you want to bring you happiness and what youll do to achieve this. You don't necessarily have to refer to this list every day but writing is a good way to reflect properly.
OK assuming you are living in the first world...
Realise - the lowest point is a judgement you're making in your head. Get into meditation to try and shrink down that big ass ego that's dragging you down.
On your worst day the sun's still shining, birds, singing, children laughing, pretty girls walking by and u can still put on your trainers and go for a walk in the park. Failure is temporary - you've failed before and life went on. Fail enough times and you'll learn and start to succeed.
Realise - the lowest point is a judgement you're making in your head. Get into meditation to try and shrink down that big ass ego that's dragging you down.
On your worst day the sun's still shining, birds, singing, children laughing, pretty girls walking by and u can still put on your trainers and go for a walk in the park. Failure is temporary - you've failed before and life went on. Fail enough times and you'll learn and start to succeed.
GS750
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 28, 2013
- Messages
- 1,561
- Reaction score
- 187
one thing that's helpful is to stay away from whiney, negative, no good people. Misery loves company. Remove negative influences in your life and you'll find yourself in a much better place. This includes low quality women of course.
Serenity
Moderator
Trial and error and a sh!t ton of self-awareness. That's how I drag myself up of a ditch. It's directly comparable to the actions you take if you fall into a real hole, do you just stay there slowly dying or do you get to work exploring ways to climb out.
The same goes for how I feel in life. If I feel down I try something and pay attention to the effect of what I do. If I feel better it worked and if not I try something else. Even though something worked I keep trying more things, before I know it I have a huge number of options that work and know what won't work.
I've worked on things before seeing it as impossible, but after putting in enough effort I have figured out a solution that satisfies me.
It's usually for me painful to do this, but if I don't I'll suffer for a lot longer. I trade long-term suffering for a more intense short-term burst of pain that passes rather quickly. Just like babies cry over something and in the next couple of minutes return to their happy usual selves. It's intense, but highly temporary.
The same goes for how I feel in life. If I feel down I try something and pay attention to the effect of what I do. If I feel better it worked and if not I try something else. Even though something worked I keep trying more things, before I know it I have a huge number of options that work and know what won't work.
I've worked on things before seeing it as impossible, but after putting in enough effort I have figured out a solution that satisfies me.
It's usually for me painful to do this, but if I don't I'll suffer for a lot longer. I trade long-term suffering for a more intense short-term burst of pain that passes rather quickly. Just like babies cry over something and in the next couple of minutes return to their happy usual selves. It's intense, but highly temporary.
As another user put it, realize your mistakes. I believe Sly Stallone in Rocky 6 said to his son "its not how you get hit, its how hard you can get hit and you still keep on going".
Know why it happened and what can be done so you will not hit your lowerst point again. From this point the only way is back up.
Many sportsman, teams have failed before and have come back up, I'm into cricket and their are some world cup winners, finalists who trumiphed over the odds, even sportsman who had their named blacked out like Rossi before 82, only to emerge as the goldon boot and world cup winner, their are many great examples too.
What are your goals? Make something of yourself, know how far you've come in your life, how bad you want it, develop discipline, motivation, be with supportive people, soildier on. Partake in hobbies that you enjoy doing, go to the gym.
Good luck!
Know why it happened and what can be done so you will not hit your lowerst point again. From this point the only way is back up.
Many sportsman, teams have failed before and have come back up, I'm into cricket and their are some world cup winners, finalists who trumiphed over the odds, even sportsman who had their named blacked out like Rossi before 82, only to emerge as the goldon boot and world cup winner, their are many great examples too.
What are your goals? Make something of yourself, know how far you've come in your life, how bad you want it, develop discipline, motivation, be with supportive people, soildier on. Partake in hobbies that you enjoy doing, go to the gym.
Good luck!
“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”
You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.
I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.
Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.
These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.
Lozboss
Master Don Juan
One of my favorite quotes is Confuscious:
"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall."
It takes time to pull yourself from the pit, but you do that day by day, focus on your daily goals, achieve them and you'll achieve your long term goals.
Set some things you want to achieve and a plan on how to do that day by day. Then it's the perseverance to carry that through.
"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall."
It takes time to pull yourself from the pit, but you do that day by day, focus on your daily goals, achieve them and you'll achieve your long term goals.
Set some things you want to achieve and a plan on how to do that day by day. Then it's the perseverance to carry that through.
Bible_Belt
Master Don Juan
You either want to be happy or you don't. It's all up to you. The choice is yours to make.
Go on a cleanse. I stop communications with everyone , go off social media and just do things that make ME happy.
If that means , after work you want to play games till your next work day then do just that. Sometimes you just need some lone time from the crazy and fast life.
If that means , after work you want to play games till your next work day then do just that. Sometimes you just need some lone time from the crazy and fast life.
RangerMIke
Master Don Juan
My low point.... Man not sure if I want to share this but what the fvck .... here it goes.....
My girls (twins) were born beginning of December 2003. On January 2003 I was called back on active duty and sent to Afghanistan... where as far as I know... can't post what I did, but it was working with special operations forces from multiple nations. While there had some brushes with death, as might be expected. But truth is I've been through this BS before, I was in Mogadishu with TF Ranger, as well as with the French Armored Division as a liason in the 1st Gulf War, and also part of the invasion force during Operation Just Cause in Panama. So being in combat was not new to me.
What was new was a wife that spent her time fvcking any hard c0ck she could get her nasty ***** hands on while I was overseas. The other times I was in combat I was NOT married.
Coming back and learning that, as well as learning she ignored my children while she rode the c0ck carousel, was pretty fvck low...
How did I get over it????.... well, I just accepted the fact that ALL WOMEN were just like her.... they were all just a bunch of *****s that under the right set of circumstances would behave EXECTLY like she did. This was hard... because it meant that I would have to exept my Mother, sisters, and yes even my daughters would be just like their mother. Acceptance is liberating.... and it is the ONLY fvcking way that you can effectively deal with the TRUE nature of women. NEVER NEVER NEVER assume your girl is different, she isn't.
My girls (twins) were born beginning of December 2003. On January 2003 I was called back on active duty and sent to Afghanistan... where as far as I know... can't post what I did, but it was working with special operations forces from multiple nations. While there had some brushes with death, as might be expected. But truth is I've been through this BS before, I was in Mogadishu with TF Ranger, as well as with the French Armored Division as a liason in the 1st Gulf War, and also part of the invasion force during Operation Just Cause in Panama. So being in combat was not new to me.
What was new was a wife that spent her time fvcking any hard c0ck she could get her nasty ***** hands on while I was overseas. The other times I was in combat I was NOT married.
Coming back and learning that, as well as learning she ignored my children while she rode the c0ck carousel, was pretty fvck low...
How did I get over it????.... well, I just accepted the fact that ALL WOMEN were just like her.... they were all just a bunch of *****s that under the right set of circumstances would behave EXECTLY like she did. This was hard... because it meant that I would have to exept my Mother, sisters, and yes even my daughters would be just like their mother. Acceptance is liberating.... and it is the ONLY fvcking way that you can effectively deal with the TRUE nature of women. NEVER NEVER NEVER assume your girl is different, she isn't.