“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

When she wants to be friends...

thirdtimescharm

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I met someone from online the other day and while the conversation was fine, I'm not interested in anything more. Today I got an email from her and she wants to be friends. So how do I politely say that I'm not really into being friends with women who I'm not sleeping with? Also, I know being friends with her is NOT going to open up opportunities for me with her friends, so there is no real benefit that I can think of.
 

Just because a woman listens to you and acts interested in what you say doesn't mean she really is. She might just be acting polite, while silently wishing that the date would hurry up and end, or that you would go away... and never come back.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

KontrollerX

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"Aww thats too bad, I was hoping we could be something more, I'm really sorry but I don't keep women as friends who I'm not having a relationship with".
 

thirdtimescharm

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or maybe:

"That's sweet, but I'm not real good at being friends with women who I'm not having a relationship with. Then again, I'm probably not too good at having relationships right now either ;-)"
 
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KontrollerX

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That works too.

A person's own words are generally the best anyway but yeah you got my general idea down with your phrasing.

It makes you out to be not bitter while taking away validation from her that she's just oh so special you'd have to keep her in your life despite not gettin any.

So its basically the perfect response.

Also it makes you out to be a good confident man who really values relationships lmfao.
 

thirdtimescharm

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hey...I am a good confident man who values relationships!

Especially ones with really hot women ;-)
 

Mr.Positive

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Here's what you do. Have fun with this. Throw "friends" right back in her face. Life is short, it's good to fvck with gals this way.

Assume she means friends with benefits...

Girl: blah blah blah..you...blah blah..me..blah...Friends.

You: Uh, yeah. I'm down with that. I'll be over soon. Do you want to watch a movie first or just get right down to business?

Girl: No, you don't understand. I mean friends.

You: Yeah, I know what friends means. I think it's a great idea. I really can't see myself in a relationship with you either, so 'friends' is perfect for me too. I'll tell you what, you get the music going...I'm bringing the whip cream!

Just keep going like this...she will eventually see her own bullsh!t.
 

RecoveringAFC

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Here's one I got from a woman online recently:
---
I have been doing some meditating and reflecting recently and I am not sure if I the best thing for me right now is to meet new people. I have other things in my life that I need to take care of. I am still undecided about everything. I am hoping to get some clarity soon.
---

Feel free to use it. :)

Translation: I saw your pictures and you're just not my type.
 

thirdtimescharm

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RecoveringAFC said:
Here's one I got from a woman online recently:
---
I have been doing some meditating and reflecting recently and I am not sure if I the best thing for me right now is to meet new people. I have other things in my life that I need to take care of. I am still undecided about everything. I am hoping to get some clarity soon.
---

Feel free to use it. :)

Translation: I saw your pictures and you're just not my type.
Your recovery period isn't over yet if you'd think I'd use a response written by a WOMAN. Especially considering that it clearly is a blowoff to someone she has not met yet, while the woman I am talking about I have met...the reality just was not as attractive as the photos.
 

thirdtimescharm

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Mr.Positive said:
Just keep going like this...she will eventually see her own bullsh!t.

Very good stuff, Mr. P! I would use it if she were actually worth any more of my time, but it's definitely good to use when someone gets the "friends" line from a HB who you want to keep working on.
 

Rollo Tomassi

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Women have used the LJBF rejection for a hundred years because it serves an ego preservation function for her. To a greater or lesser degree, women require attention and the more they have of it the more affirmation they experience, both personally and socially. The LJBF rejection is a social convention that has classically ensured a woman can reject a man yet still maintain his previous attention. It also puts the responsibility for the rejection back on his shoulders since, should he decline the 'offer of friendship', he is then responsible for entertaining this 'friendship'.

This of course has the potential to backfire on women these days since the standard AFC will accept an LJBF rejection in the mistaken hope of 'proving' himself worthy of her intimacy by being the perfect 'surrogate boyfriend' - fulfiling all her attention and loyalty prerequisites with no expectation of reciprocating her own intimacy.

The LJBF rejection also serves as an ego preservation for her in that having offered the false olive branch of 'friendship' to him in her rejection she can also sleep that night knowing that she (and any of her peers) wont think any less of herself. Afterall, she offered to be friends, right? She is excused from any feelings of personal guilt or any responsibilities for his feelings if she still wants to remain amiable with him.

I think the default response should be to take the LJBF as what it is - as a rejection (and her loss) ergo, you remove the reinforcer - attention. Up until the point you made an approach for her intimacy she was enjoying the benefit of your attentions. After an LJBF response her latent intent is to keep that reinforcer of attention. Do not reward her for this disingenuous response, she will only use it on you again or with another guy in a similar situation since it was reinforced the last time this circumstance was experienced. And should the next fellow reinforce it further she will internalize this as her standard response.

Obviously the best way to enact this is to do what you did; use a takeaway and turn down her LJBF. An outright refusal of her psuedo-friendship offer would be ideal, but not always possible given social settings, however a takeaway is always warranted. The problem I see with doubting her intent with the LJBF is that, most women, whether serious or not in their LJBF rejection, will almost always follow up with some kind of communication when you do remove your previous attentions. This was a previous reinforcer to her and like most animals when faced with a behavioral extinction, she will attempt to re-establish that reward. This is why if you do end up cutting all contact with her she will have a tendency to pursue - and depending on the individual sometimes more actively pursue - your attention, even if she has no intent of becoming intimate with a guy. Women do this in an effort to maintain self-affirmation (i.e. she wants to verify everything is 'OK' between you and her in an email or IM) after a rejection.

The problem is when a guy begins to doubt her seriousness in her rejection when this occurs. We always read guys on this forum state that a fellow ought to "stick to his guns" in situations of rejection and this becomes more difficult when she confuses him with an unexpected burst of spontaneous attention. It's the stripper effect only more personal. Guys will spend small fortunes on lapdances at the strip club because it provides him with something he's not ordinarily accustomed to - spontaneous feminine attention. Similarly, when a woman does a follow up to a LJBF rejection after a takeaway the reaction is like that for men. Maybe she does actually like him afterall? Maybe he does have a shot with the stripper in his lap, she's giving him confusing signals in either instance.
 

GitFiddler

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Last month I was talking to a female acquaintance, andI told her straight up that if she's my freind, she would introduce me to any and all of her hot girlfriends.

She says something like " Oh, ok. I'll do that from now on. Actually, there were a few girls that were asking me about you last night." I just about smacked her!

So, now I've been adamant about telling my female acquaintances that it's their job as my "friend" to introduce me. Especially the ones that reject me. "hell, if you want me off your back, help me find a replacement." fair enough right. Any chick that helps get me laid is my friend. I get pissed at them when they dont have my back in that way, and they're starting to come around.
 

Luveno

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GitFiddler said:
Last month I was talking to a female acquaintance, andI told her straight up that if she's my freind, she would introduce me to any and all of her hot girlfriends.

She says something like " Oh, ok. I'll do that from now on. Actually, there were a few girls that were asking me about you last night." I just about smacked her!

So, now I've been adamant about telling my female acquaintances that it's their job as my "friend" to introduce me. Especially the ones that reject me. "hell, if you want me off your back, help me find a replacement." fair enough right. Any chick that helps get me laid is my friend. I get pissed at them when they dont have my back in that way, and they're starting to come around.
I actually like this approach. It's essentially "put your money where your mouth is!".
 

Jitterbug

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GitFiddler said:
Last month I was talking to a female acquaintance, andI told her straight up that if she's my freind, she would introduce me to any and all of her hot girlfriends.

She says something like " Oh, ok. I'll do that from now on. Actually, there were a few girls that were asking me about you last night." I just about smacked her!

So, now I've been adamant about telling my female acquaintances that it's their job as my "friend" to introduce me. Especially the ones that reject me. "hell, if you want me off your back, help me find a replacement." fair enough right. Any chick that helps get me laid is my friend. I get pissed at them when they dont have my back in that way, and they're starting to come around.
I gotta start doing this. I'm not using the chicks in my social circle to do the leg work for me to hook me up with their friends and that's a waste.
 
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