"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

When is taking 'being a jerk' too far?

SinJester

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I want to know your opinions, formed from your experience, on when you can take being a jerk too far.

Now I'm naturally c/f. I'm thinking that it just depends on the girl how she will react to it. I'm not worries about it, at the moment I'm just reflecting and I would like the input from others.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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I.A.F.Y.B.

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Some girls take things too seriously and fvckn act like you killed their cat or something.. Going too far I would say is.. treating her bad all the time or going over board on busting her balls.

I can't really say what is going too far. You will have to find out yourself.
 

SinJester

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Something else: If you bust her balls when you meet her do you have to keep it up somewhat even if she opens up?

I have experiance with this it just hasn't all clicked yet.
 

WC2

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SinJester said:
Something else: If you bust her balls when you meet her do you have to keep it up somewhat even if she opens up?

I have experiance with this it just hasn't all clicked yet.
It's a good habit to play neutral when a woman opens up to you. Imagine you were intimately talking about yourself and all she did was poke fun at you. You wouldn't be so persuaded to open up to her again would you?

Being sort of a jerk is always a good way of making your presence known. The last thing a woman wants is a quiet man who sits back in the corner in open discussion. She'd much rather talk to the guy who's poking fun at people and giving the conversation life.

However, you can't play the jerk card forever. Sure, you still need to keep it playful and poke fun, but when it comes down to you and her, you must be a little more cooperative and listen enough to where you can make a decent conversation. There's a thin line between being funny and attractive with a woman and being just a "jerk".
 

Guybrush

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IT depends on how SECURE and CONFIDENT the girls feel inside.

Insecure women take your C/F attitude too serious because they can't handle your picking up on them.

That's why C/F works best with attractive women since they are usually much more confident and secure than an ordinary HB 5-6.


Using C/F requires more finesse than the way David D sells it and it should be used with care.

Most women are never satisfied by whom they really are so you have to find that out in the midst of your interactions with her.

My personal method is to start by light jokes and gradually build up the tension.

It's good practice to make fun of yourself ocassionally to release it and it'll add the FUN ingredient to the recipe (which is absolutely necessary!)

You have to release the tension by being friendly, caring, and genuinely funny!

It's going in between back and forth...

Otherwise you'll come off as an arrogant jerk especially with INSECURE women
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

SinJester

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Thanks guys, these are the kinds of comments I was looking for. I don't usually ask for advice because I form most of my opinions from experiance, but input from other guys with experiance really helps put things in perspective.

My method involves reading the girl first. The ****ier/hotter/more confident is her the more of a 'jerk' i will be. However once I have made it clear her looks don't mean anything to me I will reward her for any information about herself and her personality. Once she opens up I turn nice, but still fun. This doesn't work on insecure girls I think, not counting girls whoa re ******dly ****y but secretly insecure.

I recenty read How To Be The Jerk Women Love and it put a lot of stuff into words for me which really helped. I've been through all this kind of stuff before but this gave me new perspective. FJ Shark says to treat the dicounts (girls lacking confidence) like premiums (girls that are hot and know it) and the premiums like discounts. Like you are saying Guybrush. I completely agree with you that David D overdoes c/f, you don't need it and in some cases it doesn't work. But that's his trademark and it's naturally the kind of guy he is.

And cheers for that post WC2, I really needed that, great advice. I have a habit of overdoing it, because was a nice guy before and when you try something else you can have a tendancy to go too far the other way. I'm way too worried about being a 'nice guy' and falling into the friends zone because of my sosuave education and nice guy history.

Imagine you were intimately talking about yourself and all she did was poke fun at you. You wouldn't be so persuaded to open up to her again would you?
I see that now. That's the difference between being a 'jerk' in the DJ sense and just a plain d!ck!
 
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