"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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When do you have your 2nd date?

sosumba

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So if you had one date with a girl and you want to plan the next date. When do you go on the next date? Is it one week later or maybe 3-4 days later? What is the preferred way to go?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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SW15

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I have typically tried to do it within 5 days of the first date. I haven't experimented with the no contact, let her text first after the date method, which I had never heard about before joining this board.
 

Serenity

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If she's really interested in you then it doesn't matter much, she's going to want to see you again ASAP. So let's say you're a moderately busy guy who typically have plans the next two days, planning a date 3 days in advance makes sense. Going up to a week isn't wrong either, it makes sense that sometimes you might have plans until then.

If she expresses that she really REALLY wants to see you again very soon, then same day or next day may also be an option if that's convenient for you.

Waiting for too long is almost never a good idea, doing it on purpose is stupid. She will lose interest and you will lose the opportunity.

So, whenever is more convenient for you is the right answer. If she's interested enough she'll say yes and she'll be there. If she's not that interested then you just saved yourself some time, congrats.
 

GearsGod310

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If she's really interested in you then it doesn't matter much, she's going to want to see you again ASAP. So let's say you're a moderately busy guy who typically have plans the next two days, planning a date 3 days in advance makes sense. Going up to a week isn't wrong either, it makes sense that sometimes you might have plans until then.

If she expresses that she really REALLY wants to see you again very soon, then same day or next day may also be an option if that's convenient for you.

Waiting for too long is almost never a good idea, doing it on purpose is stupid. She will lose interest and you will lose the opportunity.

So, whenever is more convenient for you is the right answer. If she's interested enough she'll say yes and she'll be there. If she's not that interested then you just saved yourself some time, congrats.
THIS!
 

FlexpertHamilton

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Less than a week for sure, unless you are both genuinely busy. The sooner the better, really. In my experience it's usually 3-5 days later. You have to move fast with women nowadays (especially younger ones), they have endless options and can't make up their minds. If she likes you, she'll want to see you again asap. If not, she's quite simply not worth your time.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Lookatu

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Depends...
Girls are all about emotions and it's about capitalizing and riding on her emotions if the first date ended on a high note. Don't let that warm and fuzzy feeling that you created in her fade away. That's when the second date may not go as well if you do get one. There's a fine line though about appearing needy vs communicating that you would like to see her again.

On the other hand, if the first date was just so so, you can take your time and pick something that is convenient to you.

As the saying goes... strike while the iron is hot...
 

EyeBRollin

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Wait 4-9 days then call her. In the long wait she may contact you. Use that opportunity to make the date.

When I do plan a date it’s usually 3-7 days out from that conversation.
 

Black Widow Void

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Among this forum, you'll read a lot of group-think, but then again, that's actually giving too much credit, It's probably more like "I read this within some pick up forum/book or read it here from someone that read it on a pick up site" ..and since they said that we wait for them to make the move. I'll repeat this "advice" and pass it on as my own.

... and then, you'll also read where men are supposed to be the decision makers and the ones that pursue (aka "alpha") because women don't respect men if they (women) are taking the lead.

OP.... this is what happens when a lot of inexperienced guys attempt to give advice as if they are pros (you'll read a lot of contradictory advice) .

There's no "one advice fits all" with women, but as long as we're confident on how we approach things, all is good (everyone gets rejected from time to time). The key is not to be reliant on if she approves or disapproves, but to have enough self-belief that you "don't let yourself down" (which means to do things 'your way).

Yes... sometimes women will call/text first and you take the lead from there... but there's no crime in taking initiative. In fact, being dependent for her to call isn't being cool or calculative. Others on here might dress it up as such, but in reality, it's deferring to a woman or 'playing it safe' (to avoid potential rejection).

While we might like to think that we are the "prize" and worth their efforts, this doesn't always occur on that first date.

Naturally, you do not want to appear needy or too available, but you also want be the man that takes the initiative.
 
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