"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Whee men are men and women shut the fvck up

TonyBaloney

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 9, 2012
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Any of you American gentlemen of Irish ancestry may know about the rough and tough brigade that are the Irish travellers.

There still exists in the hinterland that is rural Ireland, these men whos lives revolve around who is the biggest, strongest, meanesy mo fo. These guys meet to decide which of the familys have the stongest sons, and who ultimately through bae fist fighting is crowned the "King of Travellers"

One example of this glorious band of scoudrels is big joe joyce - a 60 year old who STILL engages in bare knuckle fist fights....he is the nearest you will ever find to the ancient line of neanderthals.......

Have a look at what i'm talking about..........

Cut to @ 1.40 for where the action begins! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pf-z0pC2dAs
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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