What's your style of escalating and heating up sexual tension on dates?

[mellow_yellow]

We know that the #1 rule is to escalate as fast as you can and push the sexual tension to the edge so you can take her from a kiss to bed ASAP. And I'm sure every guy escalates on a date in a different way, but same goal in mind. I searched some threads to see how old posters dealt with escalating and what kind of advice they got from the forum. These 3 threads were good ones I found in my search:

https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/dicarlo-escalation-ladder-kino-done-right.147259/

https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/big-mistake-most-guys-make.185913/

https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/problem-with-escalating-two-dates-and-no-kiss.234675/

How do you go about escalating and pushing the sexual tension to the boundary? I got a good tip from marmel that one way to push is to start playing with her hair and go for the kiss if she's receptive. After that, I wouldn't know how to keep progressing naturally without becoming a creep. I don't want to make this too scientific because there isn't a standard script, but when do you start pushing really heavy like grabbing her a/ss and tits? I'm curious what everyone's style is so I can mentally play out a mock scenario in my head.

Personally for me, I plateau in escalating. Touching her arm, thighs, and small of her back is just about second nature then I plateau. The last few major dates I've had, I've failed to push to a kiss and everything else after that. I keep running into the same situation where the girl wouldn't react to my touches and never touch me back. The girl would never give me any kind of IOI or sign. I know that I'll most likely run into this same exact situation over and over again until I blow through this "recurring test" by being bold.

No dates for me recently as I'm working on my LMS and not running into many women. I'm starting to see girls check me out now because I have a better aura from self-improvement. It's only a matter of time before I go on dates again. The next date I go on, I need to prepare myself mentally to escalate hard and block any doubts I have while doing it.

 

[wifehunter]

If you're following any rules, you're doing it wrong. There are no rules.

 

[Murk]

I don't do the whole let me see your jewelry/palm read/touching her hands etc - it just never flowed for me, well rather - I never remember to do it.

I will just flirt with conversation, look at her lips, put my hand round her waist, touch her thighs, smell her neck and say she smells nice. Go for the kiss as soon as I think there's enough attraction. I will sometimes say to a chick "kiss me" and they do, never have they said no, but that's because you need to gauge the moment and situation that is where EQ/emotional intelligence/social and self-awareness come in to play. I think those things make you great with not just women but people. It's guys who don't have those skills that struggle, it's those guys making fail thread after fail thread. I have NO idea how to teach or coach EQ/social and self-awareness/social savvy etc.

 

[TheGambino]

Looking deeply in her eyes while having a conversation, don't break eye contact and smile. While she is speaking, look at her lips and smile. Touch her waist, legs while you speak and bend over to smell her neck. Act like it was the best thing you smelled and she will be like what?! What!? and you say: you smell great.

Talk about cexual topics and ask her what turns her on and don't answer on it. Stuff like this makes Thegambino stand behind her with his hands choked around her neck fingering her after most dates.

Stay icey!

 

[mellow_yellow]

I don't do the whole let me see your jewelry/palm read/touching her hands etc - it just never flowed for me, well rather - I never remember to do it.

I will just flirt with conversation, look at her lips, put my hand round her waist, touch her thighs, smell her neck and say she smells nice. Go for the kiss as soon as I think there's enough attraction. I will sometimes say to a chick "kiss me" and they do, never have they said no, but that's because you need to gauge the moment and situation that is where EQ/emotional intelligence/social and self-awareness come in to play. I think those things make you great with not just women but people. It's guys who don't have those skills that struggle, it's those guys making fail thread after fail thread. I have NO idea how to teach or coach EQ/social and self-awareness/social savvy etc.

Yeah I'm seeing that it's a subtle dance that's about non-verbal talking not the actual talking. In my last date, a major lesson I learned is that as we're both verbally talking, I need to be simultaneously communicating that I want her non-verbally through deeper eye contact and well-placed kino. I think when you want her, that gets communicated over through your body language.

Your post really resonates with this lesson I learned. I screwed up with a HB8 by not going for the kiss at the first bar we were at when she was asking for it. I didn't realize how much my deep eye contact turned her on while we were talking. We were sitting really close, facing each other. At one point when I was staring into her eyes, her eyes trembled and they went down to my lips and back to my eyes. We were surrounded by a bunch of people and I feared getting possibly humiliated in front of an audience. By the time, we got to the 3rd bar, I was too late. I was focusing way too much on what we were talking about, not how we were talking on the date.

 

[mellow_yellow]

Looking deeply in her eyes while having a conversation, don't break eye contact and smile. While she is speaking, look at her lips and smile. Touch her waist, legs while you speak and bend over to smell her neck. Act like it was the best thing you smelled and she will be like what?! What!? and you say: you smell great.

Talk about cexual topics and ask her what turns her on and don't answer on it. Stuff like this makes Thegambino stand behind her with his hands choked around her neck fingering her after most dates.

Stay icey!

Good tip. I can feel the sexual tension as I run through the scenario in my head. You and Murkserious have a similar approach. On my next string of future dates, I'll push harder on the non-verbal rather than getting so absorbed on the conversation topics.

 

[TheGambino]

Good tip. I can feel the sexual tension as I run through the scenario in my head. You and Murkserious have a similar approach. On my next string of future dates, I'll push harder on the non-verbal rather than getting so absorbed on the conversation topics.

DO THAT

 

[IKO69]

I just start looking at the woman a certain way (Usually I am thinknig about banging her) and I try to get closer and start touching her more and ****. The last time I didn't really have to do anything though, the woman sorta put it out there. She would start talking about sex - she mentioned some guy and said they weren't exclusive and were just having fun. I took it to mean ok so she isn't committed and will bang other guys - that guy didn't even exist I later found out after I did the business. I thought it was weird she'd concoct that sort of story btu women do strange things sometimes.

 

[mellow_yellow]

I just start looking at the woman a certain way (Usually I am thinknig about banging her) and I try to get closer and start touching her more and ****. The last time I didn't really have to do anything though, the woman sorta put it out there. She would start talking about sex - she mentioned some guy and said they weren't exclusive and were just having fun. I took it to mean ok so she isn't committed and will bang other guys - that guy didn't even exist I later found out after I did the business. I thought it was weird she'd concoct that sort of story btu women do strange things sometimes.

Yeah, you're right. It starts with the intent that I want to bang her, not hang out with her like a friend. That intent leads to looking at her a certain way and touching her a certain way. Your body language and non-verbal cues automatically calibrate to the fact you want her.

Ah, her fake f-buddy story was for sure a sh*t test to see if you'd pursue her all the way through and not give up despite her hinting about "having another man". We know that you passed lol

 

[IKO69]

Yeah, you're right. It starts with the intent that I want to bang her, not hang out with her like a friend. That intent leads to looking at her a certain way and touching her a certain way. Your body language and non-verbal cues automatically calibrate to the fact you want her.

Ah, her fake f-buddy story was for sure a sh*t test to see if you'd pursue her all the way through and not give up despite her hinting about "having another man". We know that you passed lol

Yes, I was not pleased to say the least when I found out. When I asked her about it and she told me I got quite mad at her and told her I don't like when girls play games and I called her a liar. She was shocked beyond belief that I would've gone there and couldn't even talk at first. She tried to justify it with some bull**** to save face then pouted for the remainder of our time we were together at that moment. I didn't hear from her for about 1 week but then after that she literally started blowing up my phone "hey i want to talk" "are you around?" "lets hang out" blah blah blah. I knew deep down she respected me for calling her out on her crap. You have to be tough with chicks or they'll walk all over you.