"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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What's YOUR opinion?

A

Aazman

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Basically Djing is going well.

HOWEVER

there is one girl- the best looking one in my course- and my aim: is HER. (this isn't oneitis- i have 2 other girls atm)

Now my issue is: she is a HB obv and attention is something she will get.
I've met her a few times, shown my confidence and made her buy me a drink. Pulled a joke or two etc.

Now the issue arrises I don't know how much repo I have built from that nor whether she is attracted to me because:

She will stare at me as I walk/ leave a room and will chat to me when she's on her own. I decided she was not responding to my convo when i chatted to her in the party, so moved on to the next babe. Obviously staring is a good thing- however staring at me when im not looking or when im leaving a party? is that really an indication? or is it jealousy from chatting to other babes?

Minor chat is held on other occasions but nothing longer than a few seconds. Talking to her about herself is something I haven't really done.

I have two options- steal her now and steal her now.

Solution: That is the issue.

Would it be advisable rather than to bluntly ask her, to chill out with her, and then ask her on a date?

Or the one which I prefer, be different from the other chumps- ask her out on a date? (similar to my other pick convo earlier on this week)

If anyone has any experience in a similar situation can you please advise
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Kailex

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"I'm going to (Insert name of place here) on (Insert date here, preferrably in "Day of the Week" form) at (Insert exact time). You should come with me and get a drink or two."
 
A

Aazman

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I've been looking at bootcamp and I'm wondering does anyone know a method to improve aspects of flirting.

I'm generally a guy who is fairly poor at flirting.

I find it awkward giving out compliments.
 

CaptainJ

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Aazman said:
I've been looking at bootcamp and I'm wondering does anyone know a method to improve aspects of flirting.

I'm generally a guy who is fairly poor at flirting.

I find it awkward giving out compliments.
LOL you must be poor at flirting if you think it's about giving out compliments...

Flirting is basically just being overly friendly in a sexual way. Kino is the way to go.
 
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Aazman

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haha i didn't mean complimenting was only flirting. But i generally dont like giving out compliments.

As for kino, i shall practice to make purrfect


but like comments like those legs don't look like they can take me.

i just made that up- but i sometimes think its too pervy?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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CaptainJ

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If you are confident and have social proof, then you can say whatever you want. Only be as daring as your confidence will allow. My friend is extremely confident in his flirting and will say sh1t like suggesting having a threesome with 2 girls, and they laugh and he'll go "lol you think im joking", which bolsters the attraction even more. But he is daring and so he pulls it off, but i can think of many people who say something maybe half as sexual as this and they just get seen as a complete perve, because they have no confidence or social proof.
 
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Aazman

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so basically you mean the more bold you are, and the more they see this, the more you get away with?

and what exactly is social proof- is it basically how hot the people you hang about with are?
 

f283000

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Aazman said:
so basically you mean the more bold you are, and the more they see this, the more you get away with?

and what exactly is social proof- is it basically how hot the people you hang about with are?
To put it simply social proof is like reputation/other people knowing that you have game. For example having pics of you with lots of girls in your facebook that will give you social proof. Having people see you walking around with a good looking girl will give you social proof.

how you can build social proof


The easiest way you can build social proof (which I have done) is to take my date to places that are really crowded with lots of other hot girls. Having women see you walking around/holding hands with a good looking girl will immediately make them start wondering about you/desiring you (pre-selection)

A really crowded mall is a good place. I took a girl to my university once and made it a point to walk outside where the crowds are. I could tell right away women were giving us looks. Doing these sort of things do wonders for your reputation.
 
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Aazman

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so if you don't have a date at the time, it would be advisable to befriend lots of good looking girls? And to have one or two that remain as friends, for that permanent social proofing?
 

f283000

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Aazman said:
so if you don't have a date at the time, it would be advisable to befriend lots of good looking girls? And to have one or two that remain as friends, for that permanent social proofing?
It's always good for girls to see you around good looking girls. I personally stopped being "friends" with girls because it would bring me back to being a nice guy and to behaviors i am trying to avoid. I rather always have the attitude of "shes either my lover or nothing" rather than trying to be friends with women. But it's up to you.

However, that's not going to have the same impact as you kissing/walking around holding hands with a hot girl on a crowded mall full of hb's.

example 1: The difference would be that you kissing/walking around holding hands with a good looking girl means you already got selected so there's definitely something good about you and girls will begin to wonder what/will want you.

The benefit of just having good looking female friends is that if other girls see you walking with them they might wonder if you two are a couple or not. It definitely gives you points and makes girls think about you but not to the effect of example 1.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

A

Aazman

Guest
thanks man, you mentioned not being friends with girls- is it not possible to maintain some degree of friendship( obv not very close) yet enough for them to hang around with you?

Its odd to ask- but my course has more females than males infact 70:30. Can you still maintain being a DJ whilst having a few good looking friends who are girls?

if not- what barriers did you hit?
 

f283000

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It's up to you brother. There are a lot of positives to having hot female friends (social proof, getting introduced to her other hot female friends, networking) while there are also negatives (drama, being feminized, losing dj mentality)

I personally chose to stop having female friends in order to keep and grow my dj mentality. Watching guys that are good with women I realized that they hang out with their buddies and the women in their lives are the women they are f***ng.

It has helped me a lot in setting my priorities straight and simplifying my life and mentality. My interactions with women are either strictly business and professional or me wanting to get with them. So when you have this mentality it builds you into a sexual being and women can tell.

But again it's up to you to decide how you want to lead your life.
 
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