What's wrong with this picture?

[Maniax]

I'm probably as wimpy as they come. When I fall for someone I fall hard. Pleasing a woman fulfills me. As long as she is supportive and won't damage my self-esteem, I enjoy making her happy. I put her pleasure first and encourge her to even be a bit selfish. Why is that so bad? Or is it bad? Am I reading into this site wrong?

How much can one do by himself? If you know something, no matter how amazing it is, you don't get the full pleasure until you tell someone else about it. We need other people to feel fulfilled. Is that such a bad thing? I personally don't like getting girls for a one night stand and that's it, and girls who are looking for that don't appeal to me. I'm a LTR one girl kind of guy.

But still, I guess it bothers me that when I really really like someone, when I'm around them I'm ecstatic and so happy, and when I'm not with her I'm unhappy. Don't really like feeling this way, vulnerable, insecure, it's not really me.

I am confused. Any guidance and suggestions would be appreciated.

 

[DJDamage]

A woman should not be there to make you happy, only you can make yourself happy. Its nice to have a relationship but your world should not crumble when you don't have one or when your woman is not happy.

LTR is a nice thing only when a woman earns your trust and love. Until then you got to play the field in order to know what kind of a woman will make you happy. When you date several women at a given time your perspective changes: You will no longer tolerate bad behaviour because you are dating other women and you are no longer depended on one. Therefore you won't have problems dropping the bad one and picking others to replace her. You will be a better and more confident man for it and women will sense and know this and WANT YOU EVEN MORE!! so the benefits are huge.

In order to catch a good woman for LTR you got to play the field. If you don't play the field and are after the "one" you will be a desperate man and will either not get the woman or she will treat you like sh1t because she knows she can get away with it. Women always want what other women want.

Re-read the DJ bible espcially Pook's articles on being a man.

 

[Maniax]

so? AFC of the year? Month? Week?

Also, don't you think that eventually, after you settle down with someone, you become more AFC? The DJ bible says itself that most of these tips are before you start becoming serious with someone, to filter out the bad from the good. What about after you're serious with someone ?

 

[Maniax]

I agree Damage. When I read the DJ bible it makes me more confident and enthusiastic. I used to read chapter 1 (the one with pook's article, etc.) every day for like a month straight. I really drilled it into my head. Started doing cold approaches, everything. That was a few months ago. Haven't touched it since then. But why is it that guys need girls for fulfillment? I guess that noone is an island, they need guys too for fulfillment. This independent "I stand alone" **** eventually crumbles, I guess it just takes time to take its toll.

 

[alldidas]

So being around a girl you like doesn't have an effect on your happiness? yea right. So if you were dating someone for a long time and it ended all the sudden you would be happy if you thought the relationship was going great? Yea right.

 

[Maniax]

alldidas I"m not sure I understand what you're saying.

 

[DJDamage]

Originally posted by alldidas
So being around a girl you like doesn't have an effect on your happiness? yea right. So if you were dating someone for a long time and it ended all the sudden you would be happy if you thought the relationship was going great? Yea right.

Women adds to your happiness, so if you lose them of coarse your happiness will decrease but eventually you will recover and continue with your life. Some guys committ suicide because of a woman that left them. Those guys were never happy to begin with! because they based their entire existence and happiness on the woman in their life not on their own life.

 

[Maniax]

Originally posted by DJDamage
Women adds to your happiness, so if you lose them of coarse your happiness will decrease but eventually you will recover and continue with your life. Some guys committ suicide because of a woman that left them. Those guys were never happy to begin with! because they based their entire existence and happiness on the woman in their life not on their own life.

Agreed. What I'm trying to say is that you can be content by yourself, but not happy. Truly, deeply happy that is. Same thing with kids who grow up with one parent... incomplete

 

[Maniax]

So what's the DJ philoshopy? I remember reading a few times here before that most of these things apply to when you're in the choosing and early dating phase. As time goes on, you can be more nice. Any other observations?