Whats wrong with me?

[paymon]

I am 21, male, on a big college campus in Texas. Last week I approached a girl at the pool, got her #. Called her up a few days ago, we did dinner. She was amazing, very unique interests, great conversationalists, beautiful face/figure. We went back to my place and watched a movie/made out. I called her two days later to check up on her and she seemed happy to hear from me and was down to hang out later that week. I called three days later and left an aggressive voicemail saying something like "you are mine on saturday night" etc in order to setup something for the weekend, I told her to call me back. No call back, no nothing, been almost two days.

I have a hunch she had an existing relation with someone from her hometown in Ohio because she had two missed calls from this dude during our outing. (I know bc she left her phone at my place and I had to return it to her later). Or maybe I was just too aggressive. She mentioned her and this high school boyfriend had tried to do the long distance thing many times. But I am not sure if they were still going at it. Regardless, I saw her at the pool again today, and avoided her as we walked by another.

This girl is done, but more importantly I've been feeling pretty ****ty. I don't know how to describe it. I've only known her for a week. Why do I feel like I have such an emotional investment in her? Just reviewing this post makes me feel sick. I am good looking, fit, smart, wealthy; why I am so soft on the inside?

The same thing happened last year, dated a girl for two weeks, she left after I igonored her a lil bit too much; and I was feeling down for a solid month.

 

[JackRyanJuan]

How many girls are you dating at the moment? If you're getting this hung up on someone you've only known for a week, you may have some mild oneitis. If that's the case , sounds like you need to spin more plates.

Another possibility is that you don't have total control over your emotional responses. In other words, you invest too much too soon, like you said. Again, if this is the case, I think your solution is to spin more plates.

Let me know if this hits the mark, or give some more details if not.

By the way, as far as the girl goes, it's tough to call. She could just be uninterested, or she could be playing games, or she could be very traditional in that she doesn't call back. Obviously you hope for the third, but no telling.

 

[MotownMack]

Agree, spin more plates. Get a few girls to talk to so you're not so interested in her. And stop putting her on a pedestal. It's been a week.

On aggressive moves: IMO, best not done over voice mail, text, etc. You can't gauge her reaction to make sure she took it properly, and there is obviously no way for you to "recover" if she does.

So you haven't heard from her in "almost" 2 days? Dude, this is so not DJ it's not even funny. You're still in this, but if you don't get a hold of yourself, you're going to totally screw it up. Get a grip, first and foremost.

 

[paymon]

I am currently just pursuing her at the moment. You are right, I invest too much too fast. I think you are right when you say that I need to just approach more women. But are there also guys who pursue minimal women but still don't get hung up? Is the only way to prevent this **** feeling to overwhelm the odds with high qtys?

I don't think I have put her on a pedastal. I have only called her three times in week duration. Maybe she wanted me to contact her daily or something? I also know that she does call back, because she immediatly called back when I contacted her after 2 days after our date.

 

[ProDJ26]

Date multiple women

Date multiple women

Date multiple women

Date multiple women

DATE MULTIPLE WOMEN

other than that there's nothing wrong with you, It's all in your head mate