"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Whats the deal here?

Nissanguy

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Well I've been dating this girl for a few weeks now. But heres the issue, she constantly talks about her ex bf, how he makes her have low self esteem and I guess he's been on her non-stop since I've been in the pic. She told me we shouldnt let him(ex) get between us and she tells me she misses me and such. I tried to set-up plans w/ her tonight for tomm. and she just says she doesnt know whats going on and to call her. She doesnt answer her phone very much for me, and when she does shes very nerved up on the phone. She likes to do the texting crap, I hate it. But she does have an anxiety disorder.
Idk, she just says all this stuff, then when I try to plan stuff w/ her she sort of blows me off. I know she doesnt have much to do, just quit her job, doesnt go out much w/ her friends etc. so I think the whole "I dont know thing" is BS.
Any thoughts? Am I just becomeing her emotional tampon about her ex? Am I just making a big deal out of nothing?
Thanks
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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:nono: Beware of becoming the "rebound guy."
 

Street_Fighter

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she sounds like a basket case ,the type of girl that has one too many issues.Unless you're a straight laced guy that dosen't mind dating one of these rollar coaster woman,I'd set this one loose.I dated a girl much like this and though there was a ton of attraction and polarity in our relationship(opposites attract) in the long run it proved to be too much.
 

Alric

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Nissanguy said:
Well I've been dating this girl for a few weeks now. But heres the issue, she constantly talks about her ex bf, how he makes her have low self esteem and I guess he's been on her non-stop since I've been in the pic. She told me we shouldnt let him(ex) get between us and she tells me she misses me and such. I tried to set-up plans w/ her tonight for tomm. and she just says she doesnt know whats going on and to call her. She doesnt answer her phone very much for me, and when she does shes very nerved up on the phone. She likes to do the texting crap, I hate it. But she does have an anxiety disorder.
Idk, she just says all this stuff, then when I try to plan stuff w/ her she sort of blows me off. I know she doesnt have much to do, just quit her job, doesnt go out much w/ her friends etc. so I think the whole "I dont know thing" is BS.
Any thoughts? Am I just becomeing her emotional tampon about her ex? Am I just making a big deal out of nothing?
Thanks
Yep. She is banging him trying to prove what a woman she is for him....then she calls you after she cleaned his mess off her tummy to talk about her feelings for him. Screw this bro! When they start talking about other guys let her know you aren't interested in hearing about other "dudes".
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Nissanguy

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Crap! Thats what I thought, instincts are always right, lol. Yeah it's been quite a roller coster w/ her, no contact for a few days and then shes all of a sudden shes all over me etc. Would have been nice to at least get laid, but just not worth the headache.
Thanks for the help guys!
 

penkitten

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years ago i dated someone who talked about his ex a lot.
i just said, aww if you miss her so much maybe you should go on over and see her, like it didn't matter to me and that we were just friends.
he shut the heck up and never talked about her again.
 
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