"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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what's her deal?

blackhatter

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Long story short, I've started talking to this girl I used to hook up with 2 or 3 years ago.

Back then she was crazy about me, but I wasn't so much about her. I ended up hooking up with her friend, she went ape **** on me and pretty much stopped talking to me.

Anyways I get a text earlier this week saying "Hey you! Let me know if you ever want to chill and smoke I'll be around this week!"

So I text her tonight, we meet up. We smoke and things are going well. I've got her laughing almost the entire time.

She brings up the past a little bit and I say, "Look babe, things have changed a little bit since then, I'm not the same dumb kid." At this point were pretty close to each other so I try to pull her towards me to make the move and she just laughs.

Immediately after she starts asking me about my ex, and she tells me how she's trying to work things out with her ex (he cheated on her).

At this point I'm feeling dumb for even going in for the move, but wondering why she wanted to hang out?

Anyways, 15min later I tell her I've gotta get some sleep and bounce. On the way out she tells me to give her a call later this week so we can chill again.

So does this chick want it or is she just seeking some rebound company? I feel like I could've made a 2nd attempt, but I don't label myself as desperate for pvssy.

I feel pretty confident she wants it, as she used to be crazy about me, but maybe she's feeling a little hesitant?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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blackhatter

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So I waited a day or two and texted her tonight.

Joked around for a few minutes then said, hey you want to chill later tonight?

She replies back "Yeah def! I'll call you when I'm done work!"

If she comes over to my place tonight, I'm definitely making the move early on. She wouldn't come her to chill for the 2nd time in 3 days unless she wanted to hookup right?
 

sodbuster

Master Don Juan
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Yes she would/could hang with you with no expectations. 1 She may be get ting revenge,2 She remembers the past and doesn't want to revisit it,3 She may be using you for a smoking buddy,4 God only knows what other reasons a woman might have
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Sir_Turtle

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Agreed, your being used for validation, rebound company, and probably to make her ex jealous.

She probably won't hook up with you unless you can emotionally overwhelm/seduce her in some way.... which isn't likely.

If she has hot friends I'd suggest using her to get to them, she's gonna be more trouble than its worth even if you do get some..
 
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