"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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What's a slick way to respond to this?

F

Fly By Night

Master Don Juan
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I am making out with this one chick and I'm trying to escalate in a certain way. (taking clothes off, different position, etc.) Then she backs off then starts asking "Why?" to EVERYTHING. It actually got kind of annoying, I just wanted to be like "'CAUSE THAT'S WHAT MEN AND WOMEN DO WHEN THEY LIKE EACH OTHER!!" but that would be bad.

How do you respond to this? I'm just trying to escalate then she starts trying to switch the physical action to verbal.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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E

Eternal_water

Master Don Juan
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I dunno maybe lock eyes kiss her to shut her up. Hard to know really, not many details there
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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