What's a good bogus excuse to approach in class

[Kaim Argonar]

So yeah this morning I decided that I was interested in one of the girls in class. Before asking her out a bit more formally I'd like to talk to her once first, but I'd like to do so in a way that wouldn't sound threatening (like say, "Would you agree to help me with the studying?", which sounds a bit too involving and transparent).

I'm a bit lacking in inspiration now, perhaps I should just attempt to sit near her if that's possible by arriving like ten minutes before class begins, and then at the break feign innocence and ask some detail about an exam from another course, and then try to expand the conversation just a bit from there.

And then the next week try to figure out a way to talk to her without there being a ****ton of other people around. I don't know how to do that, except to come up to her and say "hey, can I talk to you for a minute?" and then take her apart. But then couldn't it just make her anxious and spoil the whole thing?

I know these things have low odds of working, but I'm a very daring, confident guy when I want to. This seems to be a good time since with the end of the semester, there's no chance for annoying college gossip/drama or whatnot. Hopefully I make this an occasion to become even more nonchalant, and to be able to handle rejection with a smile should it come. Surely it can be an entertaining event no matter the outcome.

 

[Warrior74]

how about looking for some IOIs first? some eye contact maybe?

 

[bachelor]

Why don't you approach her after class?? I used to this alot of times and number closed...

The lecture today sucked didn't it? Then start talking away from there....

 

[Kaim Argonar]

sit near her before class starts. if you can't, just approach after class. whether other people are around or not is completely irrelevant. dont throw in variables that don't matter/make sense.

but couldn't it make her very shy to talk about such things when other people could pry on the whole convo, she already seems like a reserved/timid girl and she also doesn't seem to smile a lot

from what I could see she just mostly pays attention to the teacher and doesn't seem curious enough to look at her surroundings

Why don't you approach her after class?? I used to this alot of times and number closed...

The lecture today sucked didn't it? Then start talking away from there....

I guess that could work, unless she starts putting her coat on when she realizes that the course will soon be over and leaves in a blaze as soon as the teacher gives the cue, as most students (including myself) do.

 

[bachelor]

but couldn't it make her very shy to talk about such things when other people could pry on the whole convo, she already seems like a reserved/timid girl and she also doesn't seem to smile a lot

from what I could see she just mostly pays attention to the teacher and doesn't seem curious enough to look at her surroundings




I guess that could work, unless she starts putting her coat on when she realizes that the course will soon be over and leaves in a blaze as soon as the teacher gives the cue, as most students (including myself) do.

Then, my best bet for you would be to set the approach before class or randomly sit next to her. Remember to be relaxed when you are talking to her. Is there a big test coming up?

I used to do study groups and met a lot of people that way. My class had a list of emails and I would email all the students about setting up a study group.

It's cool because you get their contact information and it's casual.

 

[Kaim Argonar]

and so I'd ask her out on my first time talking to her? that doesn't intimidate me, but I don't know if it's the preferable thing to do, I don't know her name either

 

[drak_ool]

2 qualities that girls like are being direct and having humor. So how does it translate to the classroom?

you sit next to her (direct) and say something smart-ass (humor).

what i used to do when i was in college was ask the hot babe next to me:
"so how did you find the paper? i kinda had some trouble with it..."
HB: huh? what paper are you talking about?
me (in a serious, matter-of-fact tone) : well you know, the paper on (insert whatever topic you ve been discussing in class lately) that was due today"

at this point she should start to at least mildly panick, maybe ask other people around her about "the paper". just keep your cool, and when she finally realizes you were joking crack a smile and say something like "you are very gullible, aren't you" in a c&f manner. Now she ll try to qualify herself to you and... the game is on!

take her out right after class if your schedules permit it, to grab some coffee or whatever you feel comfortable doing.

 

[Kaim Argonar]

And then what exactly should I ask, should I propose to take her out or ask her number

I've always been reluctant in asking a girl's phone number so far, although apparently it's a good way to know if the target is into you

Tomorrow I'll spot her in class and see if I can do something, I hope she doesn't always sit near the same one or two female friends who could act like ****blockers

 

[Kaim Argonar]

ugh, I couldn't sit any close to her, and as soon as she arrived she started talking non-stop with two girls, and then she left at the break without me noticing instead of staying for the whole lecture

tomorrow I'll arrive at a specific time to be sure to pick a seat near her's, she should follow that course too

 

[ARrocket]

2 qualities that girls like are being direct and having humor. So how does it translate to the classroom?

you sit next to her (direct) and say something smart-ass (humor).

what i used to do when i was in college was ask the hot babe next to me:
"so how did you find the paper? i kinda had some trouble with it..."
HB: huh? what paper are you talking about?
me (in a serious, matter-of-fact tone) : well you know, the paper on (insert whatever topic you ve been discussing in class lately) that was due today"

at this point she should start to at least mildly panick, maybe ask other people around her about "the paper". just keep your cool, and when she finally realizes you were joking crack a smile and say something like "you are very gullible, aren't you" in a c&f manner. Now she ll try to qualify herself to you and... the game is on!

take her out right after class if your schedules permit it, to grab some coffee or whatever you feel comfortable doing.

This, my friend, is good stuff

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

ugh, I couldn't sit any close to her, and as soon as she arrived she started talking non-stop with two girls, and then she left at the break without me noticing instead of staying for the whole lecture

tomorrow I'll arrive at a specific time to be sure to pick a seat near her's, she should follow that course too

This may seem silly but why not talk to the entire group of girls? At least that way she'll recognize you as someone in her class and she may eventually become comfortable with you. It'll make things easier if you did want to approach her after class, at least she'll recognize you (hopefully if you made a decent impression).

 

[Kaim Argonar]

I'm sure that she'll recognize me, people tend to remember me because of my blonde hair and my first name has been called out by teachers in class a bunch of times, many students I didn't know spontaneously called me by my first name when they needed info too. I'll just ask a random question about a course before getting to the crucial demand to avoid any confusion. All this delivered in a relaxed manner, of course.

I don't want to deal with annoying people who were just cut off from their conversation listening to every word, period. Aren't these events supposed to be sorta intimate? Who wants to deal with such important matters when there's direct peer pressure.

I'd appreciate suggestions for the wording of the demand itself, but please don't push your machism too hard guys, most of the time you're way over the top.

 

[ElStud]

The fact that you think you need an excuse to approach her tells something about your mindset.

 

[Kaim Argonar]

except I thought this in a funny manner, what will seem at first like a random innocuous approach will then take her by surprise

deceptions entertain me

I think that one of the most reliable traits to gauge a man's confidence is his sheer nonchalance when using deceit

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...I think that one of the most reliable traits to gauge a man's confidence is his sheer nonchalance when using deceit

I'd be surprised if that wasn't one of the top 10 things that women look for in a man to breed with in fits of wild abandon.

 

[Kaim Argonar]

Well, she was smiling, looking at me straight in the eyes, and seemed to be flattered, but she told me that she already has a boyfriend. After arriving home I browsed Facebook, and saw that this was indeed true. He's much taller than me and has more muscle, too. Oh well, at least all that scheming entertained me a lot. Now back to the drawing board with no one yet in sight and nothing but my guts in my hands.