"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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What You Hate Most About Cops!

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"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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KarmaSutra

KarmaSutra

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Deus ex Pianoforte said:
Trying to turn the thread to politics in an attempt to get the thread closed is extremely weak. Your time would be better spent trying to get skip unbanned so you would have an individual that shares your warped perspective.
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Brother, when you stir your coffee how far right does the spoon lean?
 
KarmaSutra

KarmaSutra

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Deus ex Pianoforte said:
Very cute remark, but if he isn't going to drag me into a debate of politics, what makes you think you stand a chance? P.M. me if you'd like to know why people of your ilk are so few in numbers.
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I know it's cute. 100% correct to boot! And no, I prefer to keep things lively right here. PM-ing is such a girl thing. But you keep counting down the days. Hannity, Rush, O'Reilly and other rightys will be sucking each others kneecaps begging for airtime, killing each other like the dogs they are in the process.

Ahhh, the sweet stench of defeat.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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