What would you do in this situation? (Not a theory a real life situation)

[Solomon]

Got this from another forum, sometimes shiit comes up in the field, honestly this is a tough one to answer, I will post what I would do later

Hey guys, its been a while since I posted, but I just ran into an issue and I'm not quite sure how to handle it yet. Here's the scoop.

I have a new guy friend I've been hanging with lately and he is married. Initially he was telling me how much he loved his wife and that he would never cheat on her. But then he talks to the ladies with me and eventually tells me that he wouldn't know what to do if the situation came about. I like chilling with the guy because we are from the same social circle, similar hobbies, I learned a lot about game from him (he's a natural since high school), and so far we've just had a blast together. But today I bumped into a problem.

We went out last night and ended up staying later than usual. I met up with a woman who I recognized from town from 13 years ago. I've had the hots for her for a long time. Apparently my friend knew her from high school, she said she had a crush on him when they were younger, and he started acting like he was trying to hook me up with her. Then he went over to the bar next door to talk to a different girl. So things were going well with she and I and eventually I invited her to come with me to meet him at the other bar. She agreed. I could tell she liked me but wasn't admitting it. Anyways, my friend was getting pretty drunk, saying he wanted her, and joking about me and him training her. But I said I won't do a train with him.

I figured she would naturally come with me to drop him off after and then I could suggest what she and I would do next. The girl ended up suggesting we go to her place. Now any ordinary friend would just expect to be dropped off and even ask about it because they want to help a buddy out. I mean, they know the deal. But this guy didn't do that. Instead he let his greediness take him over so that he would stick around. We all went to her place. And I could tell she liked me, she was showing me pictures and wanting to be around me and things like that. Sure she likes my friend, but she really liked me. My friend was trying to hit on her while we were there and she didn't say anything. And eventually he started acting in such a way that made me uncomfortable. When she went in the other room he suggested that I could go and that he would get a cab ride home. As if she wanted him? He tried to tell me that I would have to go home early; keep in mind it was already 5:00 AM. So I gave him the middle finger.
Then eventually he asks me about if he can get some alone time with her. She can't here him saying it because she was in the other room for a moment. Additionally he was getting a bit mouthy and trying to AMOG me.

So there I am getting a bit pissed. What gives him the right to all of a sudden think she is his and not mine? To me that is just very slimy behavior. I mean, I know it takes greed to get a lot of women. But how far does the guy have to and want to take it? He just has a new born baby? I am sitting there and realizing that he just isn't going to be the one to leave. He just won't give it up. And I have things I have to do today.

So I get up, grab my coat, and tell them I have to go home and go to bed. The girl asks me why and I say I have to get up early. So she makes an excuse to follow me outside, says she wants to smoke a cigarette. She wants to know what the hell is going on. Why is the guy she likes leaving and the other guy staying? She tells me she liked how I was looking at her. I told her I liked her since the moment I saw her and then we started making out. And then she asks me what about my friend. I told her the truth and said I thought he liked her so I decided to leave. But she implied that she wasn't into him and that she wanted me. We talked about meeting up again, I took her number down, and said I would call her tomorrow/today. And I left.

Well guys, as you can see, my problem is not exactly a woman problem, but in a way it is. The girl is a friendly girl and cares for people. The guy is a good friend from my social circle. What was I to say? I wouldn't expect to bump into such a problem. Maybe I should have just gone back inside and told him the truth right then and there in front of her, that she doesn't want him and she wants me and that he had to go. There was no secret. She and I both knew the truth. And I just let it go. I didn't want to be the one to make the guy look like an ******* in front of her and badmouth him. What kind of friend would I be if I did that? And I didn't even think of a suggestion as to how we could handle the situation at that moment, I just didn't think of it. I just left. I got the idea she wanted him to leave.

And I don't know what to say to the guy next time either. I think I am just going to tell him the truth, that he stepped over the line and let his greed take him over. And maybe I won't hang out with him anymore. I mean, is it worth it? I am not going to argue over a woman. And maybe I shouldn't keep a friend around who is going to overstep boundaries like that. I mean, I never set any boundaries about that, but it should be just expected.

I don't know guys. I do think it was kind of ***** for me to just walk away like that and not say anything. Maybe I didn't need to. He should know. What would you guys do?

 

[Duffdog]

In this situation, you have to tell him. I have a dear friend who was exactly like this in most respects. We would go out and a female would like me, but he would insist that she wanted him all the time. And this would be after she had come back to MY house to sleep with ME. Part of it depends on the female, as she should take the initiative and go sit with the guy she likes. But, if that doesn't happen, you have to say or do something. When this happened to me, I used to look right at the girl and say something like "come check out my room" or if I was at her house, take her by the hand to her room. When you get to her room, shut the door. It can't get anymore obvious than that, and if a friend can't figure THAT out and find his way home... you need a new friend.

 

[Interceptor]

"Dude, youre drunk and your scaring her. I think its time you go home. Im calling you a cab, cause this is going too far."
And if he really wanted to nuke him horribly he couldve said "Dude, youre freakin married!! Get a grip! She knows youre married!"

She was looking for some alone time with Guy1, but he didnt have the wherewithall to AMOG and defend their intimacy against drunkGuy 2, thats why she began shutting down. Plus, she started to worry about her 'reputation' and got very uncomfortable.She's got two dudes in her apt at 5am.

Always defend your 'couplehood' against any dude who tries to AMOG you.
Dont let him blow you out.

And if he gets aggressive, you can laugh at him, and say things "Do you know how ridiculous you look?" and "Have you seen yourself?" , "Im embarassed for you.", " You are that envious of me?? Holy Sh*t, how pathetic."
But dont move.


Guy2 is not Guy1's "Friend" anymore.
Guy1 shouldnt have left.
She was even trying to hint to him for Guy1 to stake his claim, and he pvssied off, because he was intimidated and somehow trying to ,misguidedly in this case, be the 'better man'. But he was afraid of being 'aggressive' and/or being thought of as being too 'aggressive'. He didnt want conflict or a confrontation. Very bad, and unmanly.
But this situation warranted that. And SHE wanted that from Guy1.
And HE LEFT drunkGuy2 in her apartment! WTF?

The Better Man wouldve put a stop to dumbass , drunk Guy2 and wouldve kicked his ass out into the cold street.

 

[King Turi]

The drunk dude probably wound up getting the ***** that night though. :/