What we really want

[NSUballer]

Im at the point where i dont want to sleep with alot of different women. Its so much better when you have someone you want to be around and talk to and have sex with. LTR has not been a concern before now. Ive gone through my share of girls. Most of them were actually good people and did whatever i wanted but i ended up tellin them i didnt want to be too serious or i did somthing that would end the relationship eventually. Like most guys ive had ma heart broke before and it sucks big time. But after i had my heart broken i put up barriers against women so they never know how i really feel because i dont want to put myself out there again and get hurt. Im afraid if i get hurt again that i would never open up to anyone and be alone or jump from girl to girl forever

 

[NSUballer]

anyone else feel like this ever? Or am I just being a pansy?

 

[Obsidian]

you started being a pansy with your last gf, most likely, but simply wanting an LTR isn't pansyish

 

[seagull]

If you're a footballer, you shouldn't have many problems attracting girls unless your social skills are completely inept.

 

[NSUballer]

No I dont have ANY problems attracting girls. To tell you the truth sometimes I actually have to turn some girls away. I am a very social person, outgoing by nature. My problem is not getting dates or attracting a woman, but rather one that is compatible with my life and personality. The last girl i was with had a similar personality to me in that she was outgoing, knows alot of people, and is generally a popular person. but she liked to go out alot and always had to be doing something where I on the other hand had a set schedule everyday and when I was finished everything I just wanted to relax. for the last 3 months a social life between monday-friday was virtually nonexistent. I like going out and gettin hammered and just being around alot of people but I also like being with ONE person. Im not into ONS anymore even though I would never turn down a hot piece. Cheap hook ups are ok for a while but then you start to want something more. At least I do.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Sounds like you're finding that there's several ways in which people define themselves and how they are fulfilled. Find a way that works for you and do what's necessary to achieve it.

 

[NSUballer]

how so?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

how so?

Define yourself and your lifestyle by your terms and not by what society has dictated. If you want to look for quality above quantity, do it. There's nothing wrong with it, it's just different. Just be prepared to stand up for your convictions because the masses enjoy banding together to hurl arrows at people who stand beyond their influence.

 

[NSUballer]

I dont have any problem with being different. I actually like to be different. Judging by todays society I would be much more comfortable following my own ideals anyways. I cant stand how people get so wrapped up in all that celebrity BS. People seem so into things that have nothing to do with them.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...People seem so into things that have nothing to do with them.

Yeah so? It's called a diversion. Some people need much more of them than other people. Focus on you and what works for you and shrug off what gets everyone else through the day.

 

[CalmCoolAndConfident]

how so?

You need to look at yourself objectively and determin what you like about yourself and what you dont. See yourself as a person that you meet on the street, would you like that person. If that answer is a yes and you get a huge grin on your face, then congragulations you've gained instant game. If you like yourself then people will naturally like you.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...If you like yourself then people will naturally like you.

More specifically, people like you will naturally like you if you like yourself. Inevitably you will always come across people who will actually dislike you because you like yourself.