"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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what to make of this text...

PeakIV

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I may be getting a bit old for this game having been out for a few years with oneitiis . bumped into an old friend who has all grown up into a bit of a babe, big age gap (15 yrs) hadnt seen her for years.
she was all hugs when we saw eachother. got her a number and left it a week and text her to say it was great to see her a bit of negging on how she acted.

She replies straight away saying it was great to see me (and get this)we should hook up as long as I don't try and sleep with her!

is that a come on? getting too old for this game
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Iceberg

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PeakIV said:
I may be getting a bit old for this game having been out for a few years with oneitiis . bumped into an old friend who has all grown up into a bit of a babe, big age gap (15 yrs) hadnt seen her for years.
she was all hugs when we saw eachother. got her a number and left it a week and text her to say it was great to see her a bit of negging on how she acted.

She replies straight away saying it was great to see me (and get this)we should hook up as long as I don't try and sleep with her!

is that a come on? getting too old for this game

Whoa. Yeah. You should definitely try to sleep with her. She's putting it out there.

She might as well have said, "We should hook up some time. As long as you don't take me to the corner bar, get me drunk, take me home, unhook my bra....."
 

PeakIV

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thats what I thought. I text back "I couldn't promise that and I would give her a call sometime. no X on the end of the text. will leave it a week and get in touch.
 

Vertigo1981

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I'd say this is a clear case that you're not too old for this game. Good on ya bro.
Let us know how it goes after you call her.
 

Iceberg

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PeakIV said:
thats what I thought. I text back "I couldn't promise that and I would give her a call sometime. no X on the end of the text. will leave it a week and get in touch.
Good response. Calm and cool.

You probably know what you're doing, but here's a reminder. This girl seems to already be sold on the idea of banging you. So when you call her, you dont really need to be flirty or sexual. You don't need to remind her of what she said in that text. You just need to make a few jokes, invite her to drinks, and make your moves in person.

It sounds obvious, of course. I've just seen so many guys who screw up a sure-thing by attempting to be too charming. Or in simpler terms, they f**ked up by opening their mouths.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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pdx1138

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I've done this.

You won't have to put much effort into it, trust me.

I was having lunch with a friend I liked in high school.

she gets drunk quite easily and by the time she was on her second glass of wine she mentioned something about coming over to her house some time.

me: "ya I'd come over to your house some time"

her: "wanna have an affair"

me: "sounds like fun"

a month later we had a fiery, passionate, hot night I'll never forget.
 

taiyuu_otoko

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PeakIV said:
She replies straight away saying it was great to see me (and get this)we should hook up as long as I don't try and sleep with her!

is that a come on? getting too old for this game
She said that to satisfy her "I'm not a slvt" plausible deniability.

Personally, I think you should have taken this as an expressed desire TO sleep with you, yet completely ignored that part of her message. She only mentioned it so she wouldn't feel like a dirty girl.

Then just get together with her, and boink that shyt out of her. That way she can believe the "I'm a good girl and it just happened" fantasy, even though she basically told you to come and nail her.

Once a girl in a class I was taking asked me if I ever meet my friends for drinks. She said she wasn't looking for a boyfriend, but would like to hang out with some people. (She had recently moved to the states from Korea.)

We ended up dating for two years.
 
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