What to do

clueless61

Don Juan
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Ok, I have been hangin out with this girl from school for the last week or so, it's more then friendship but we're takin it a lil slow due to certain cercumstances, anyways last night i called her to hang out and she said she would love to but then a lil while later she called me to meet her at her friends house, well we stayed there for a bit and whatnot but i left to go see a band, I asked her to come and she declined to stay at the house with her friend and all his roomates, she knew i was a lil disappointed but its no big deal, but we made plans to go out tonight so, My question is Do I call her to do somethin TONIGHT or do I wait for her to call, I dont wanna call her and make her think i am head over heels for her But at the same time i dont NOT wanna call her, so I am askin you guys the Experts, If we made plans should I call or wait for her????
 

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LuisGarcia10

Senior Don Juan
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DJ-Dork- Was that really necessary? Just try and be helpful for crying out loud.

Basically mate, it's up to you. That might not be of that much help to you but it's the best advice anyone can give you.

People will harp on about 5 day rules about not calling etc, IMO these are for DJ's in training learning to control their desperation and waiting a little while before calling.

Don't, whatever you do, wait for her to call. That's leaving the ball in her court and you're losing control.

When you feel the time is good, call her. If she declines again without a really solid explanation then just next her.

At the end of the day, it's all a learning curve, She is but one of the many women you'll be meeting in the next few years so don't put too much emphasis on her. Call her when you want and don't ask her, but tell her to meet you where you want to meet her. Take the following two potential phone calls and spot the difference.

Call One

You: Hi it's XXXXX, I was wondering if you'd like to go out with me next Tuesday night? Maybe we could go to the movies.

Her: To see what movie?

You: Is their any movies you'd paticually like to see? It's up to you

Her: Ok, let's see XXX

You: When should I come round?

Call Two

You: Hi it's XXXX, let's go to the movies next week. There's a great new movie out called XXXX.

Her: Ok, that sounds good.

You: Right, I'll be round at 6

Now, notice the difference between the two calls. Both have positive results but that was only to highlight the differences. In real life, call one would have made you look like an in-decisive loser desperate for a date. Call two however is saying that you want to see a new movie and you want her to come, if she dosen't come it's no great loss and you'll just ask someone else.

The key is to never give her too much power. Never ask her if she wants to go somewhere, assume the sale and tell her, you'll find you get far more positive reactions that way.

Hope this helps and remember not to get hung up if it dosen't work out, there's plenty more fish in the sea.
 

clueless61

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Ya first off I aint in high school I meant my university class and Thanks for the advice it has helped, I was with her lastnight and she was ignorin me after she's the one who asked me to come to her friends house so she knew i was pissed lastnight, so she called me to clear it all up But thanks man, just started realizing its Me who has to be in control and just set her straight
 
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