"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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what to do when u dont like ur plate

_sideways_

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So I got this lady to drive 40 minutes to come see me. She's got a sweet ride, works her butt off and seems like a grown up trying to buy a house yadda yadda...not ur usual party girl staying home on work days. So its all good except she's short and chubby. Nice face, big boobs, but definately over weight...so I don't really like her, but I need more plates and bjs and so on. But I'm not at all that motivated to put in the effort except for the bang. What do u all do when u don't like ur plates all that much? I guess I have to get to know her? Ewww lol
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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SemperDJ

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Why would she be your plate if your not physically attracted to her?
If you're looking to just connect the hotdog to the donut by all means continue spinning plates with her, but if it bothers you to much in the physical aspect just simply find someone more attractive.
Problem solved
 

HyperAnalyze

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Spin her while looking for other plates, maybe get a bj from her. idk..
 

_sideways_

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True....I guess my lack of plates is forcing me to settle for a chubster...
 

VladPatton

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Tryin to bang a chick you ain't into is like tryin to shoot pool with rope.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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DragonBlood

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Sounds like its time to up your standards, get motivated and find better chicks.

In the meantime screw this one with the lights out. Probably no reason to cut her out of your life completely though, shes a fall back girl.
 

HalfPUAHalfAFC

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A little story....

I met a girl back in college. Banged her after the first two hours of knowing her. She was very sweet, pretty face, but a chubster.

Never girlfriended her up, though she was WAY into me. Probably banged her about 3 times in two years back then.

The first time was just because I was horny and she was clearly coming on to me and, well, why not.

And, the sex was pretty good. She was a fun horn dog.

Yadda, yadda, the years go by, don't see her for over a decade and etc.

Ran into her in the spring. Had drinks, banged it out again. She still struggles with her weight. But, she eats right, exercises, but just can't seem to drop it.

And, she's really a great girl. Sweet. Cute. Fun. Knows the kind of guy I am and still willing to bang. But, it stops after a while because I just show no interest in dating her on the regular.

Why? Because I know the social outings and sex will be fun, I can't see myself getting horny for her for too long. She's fun to be with her and there because she's pleasant, likes me, and guys like variation. But, I can't get beyond her size. I know she'll get freaky and give me easy sex and if she could slim up, she'd be a hottie without attitude.

So, have your fun, but just know your boner for her has a half-life. You are just gonna be able to see yourself hitting it for too long.

Chubsters, outsider their personalities, are "okay" for drought busting, but not really all that good for regular FBs because, well, no matter how kinky she is, those fat folds just get in your head after a while.

Have your fun, chase other plates, put no effort into pursuing her for even sex. Let her do the work.

In the meantime, work on yourself, spin other plates, and so on.

Some guys will criticize you for nailing cubsters, but as long as it's just a side piece for a once-in-a-while nut buster, go for it. But don't see it as anything more than that. And once you get better plates in the rotation, you'll eventually drop her.

And once you improve your SMV, such issues won't really be a problem.
 

hockeyfreak79

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Yeah I'm a similar situation, she's not a chubster though. So about 10-11 weeks in right now and my interest is lowering.

Say what?... you would rather play videos games than bang? Wtf....
I've got a plate that's a gamer chick, I just found this out. It's been awhile since I've dated a cold fish or her IL is lower than I think. (Introverted chicks sux - I'm introverted too, Smh)

I'm want to drop her from rotation but I think for now I'll put her on the back burner & spin, spin.
 

_sideways_

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Good to know I'm not all alone in thinking this way....do I will keep spinning like wheel of fortune
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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