"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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What to do when I'm talking to women who are 15 feet away or are busy?

DJDeMarco

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Lately, when I talk to women, they're out in public being busy. I'm trying to figure out what to do when I'm talking to a woman that is either
A.15-20 feet away (Stay where I'm at or get closer?)
B. They're going back to their activity (Keep talking or just leave it alone)
C. They're walking away(I'm not following).

These situations are confusing to me. I'm trying to let the girl know I want to talk with her without being desperate or needy.

Today I ran into the situation where all 3 things happened. I saw a cute girl with a friend I wanted to talk to. So I walked over to the aisle she was at. She was moving in my direction so I said "Hey, how's it going?" She answered back and seemed receptive. She moved about 15-20 feet away, stopped for a moment,and I stayed where I was at. I let there be a silence at some point, a good time for her to ask me something. Then she said she'd talk to me later.

I want to figure out what to do, especially since this is the only way I can meet women.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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bigneil

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A really confident move is the wave them over from across the room, or curl your finger towards yourself. If they jump at the motion it proves they were watching you, and you are in like Flynn.
 

Alexandar

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I love the wave her over move.

You dont have to be so worried about not seeming desperate. standing 20 feet away, leaving silences on purposes, it just makes it. more awekward.

just pretend shes an old friend, dont be afraid to walk with her a bit, engage her, even grab her hand and lead her for a walk/minidate if shes being receptive.
 

Poon King

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Approaching women in groups is USUALLY a waste of time unless you have wingman support. As you probably already know.. most women are "group thinkers" and so they lose the ability to have their own brain when friends and family are around.

Its best to approach isolated women or women you can find a way to isolate. Otherwise the odds are pretty crappy UNLESS you are approaching the alpha female of the group. Then the other girls won't matter.
 

mangotot

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If a woman is 15 feet away you get over to her double quick and approach. The only time you should not walk or run is when you have approached and the woman walks away. In which case stay where you are and continue chatting. Hopefully she'll stop or walk back over to you to continue conversation.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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DJDeMarco

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Thanks everyone. I like the move to motion them over, I'll try it. I'll feel more confident in these situations now. In Like Errol Flynn. :)

Poon King: I try to focus on women in 2-3 group sets if they're not by themselves. Anything more and it'd be tough.
 
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