"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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what the hell does this supposed to mean?

Artistpua

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Yesterday I have been on a date with this girl from school who I haven't seen for a long time since we're on summer break. So I shoot her a text a couple of weeks earlier to see what she's up to, we agree vaguely to meet up after she comes back from canada. I go to a vacation and I text "back in town" when I get back. Here goes our conversation
Her: Are you free on friday?
Me: Yes.
Her: Not anymore
So we go meet up on friday and go ice-skating as we discussed earlier. Then we go to eat dinner, it seems like we are hitting it off... Apparently she is going to visit her aunt who lives where I live. So she suggests that we bounce to the comples (where we live) and hang out there. So we get there, walk around a little bit and decide to lay down on the sunbeds around the pool (its like 9 o'clock). We are watching the sky and talking, then she turns so she's facing me with her whole body and we continue talking. (at this point Im like feeling a kind of sexual tension and my instincts are usually right.) We're not on the same sunbed so its very hard for me to just move in for the kiss so I run a routine:

Me: What would you do if I kissed you right now?
Her: *pause* Good question *pause* .....
Me: Only one way to find out
Her: No, not right now.
Me: ok. (I honestly was not affected by the rejection)
Her: Maybe some other time
Me: What do you mean?
Her: Like, later (we had talked about future dates) ....
I just wonder if its worth it. ( she had some bad experiences before)
*some small talk*
Then she says: Did you have this idea when we first agreed on the date?
Me: No, It just came up in the moment.
So I obviously don't insist and proceed with more small talk, neither she nor I made the situation awkward so we hang out more and have fun. We get up and start walking again and she stops me and hugs me really tight and thanks me, I ask her what for and she's like "I don't know.... for today maybe" I say "your welcome" and we hug for a little bit more then keep walking. So we talked and walked around the complex for the rest of the time and then I walk her to her aunt's apartment and we hug again. And I could feel her face pressing against my neck while we were hugging and also feel her heart kinda pounding.


So I'm asking you guys, what the hell is up with this? and what do you suggest I do? Cuz I think she might be the kind of girl whom I can have a long term relationship, like we are both in the choir so we're both into music, she's nice, she's different than all the *****y girls and so on...
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Artistpua

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I couldn't just go for the kiss because we were in different sunbeds as I said. I don't know if it makes any difference, I also forgot to write that she thanked me for asking and not just going in, since most guys just go in. But as I said, I couldn't just go in because we weren't sitting next to each other or something.
 

defensiveend96

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From what I've read it sounds like she is interested in you, but she is shy. She basically asked you out when she asked if you were free on Friday so that proves she likes you. But, like Ruler said, you shouldn't have asked for the kiss, you should've just went for it. Anyway, text her back in a few days and ask her out again and escalate while you are on the date. Also read the dj bible. And don't go thinking this girl is all special or else you will get the dreaded oneitis. Good luck man.
 
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