What the hell do I do?

[BlueFiend]

Hey guys, I've been reading up on this forum for a while now, decided to register to get some advice.

I'm 15, and I go to a very small school (about 40 in my year level). There's only two girls in my year that I find attractive, one is a friend and I'm not really interested in anything else, but the other is what I'm here about. I only became interested in her about 6 months ago, and it turns out she's been chasing me for about a year and a half. One of my friends asked her out, and she said yes, leaving me feeling pretty **** for being such a *****. Then the next day, she took it back and said she wasn't interested. Could there still be hope? Should I keep going for her?

Thanks guys.

 

[Konada]

Just go for it. You'll never know till you try

 

[BlueFiend]

Just go for it. You'll never know till you try

I've got a problem though, what about the bro code? I mean my friend like JUST asked her out.

 

[Pozitron]

Judge by actions. You said she said she isn't interested in your friend.
She isn't "owned" by him.
I think you should try.
If he is really your friend he won't be upset cause he blew it of and you didn't.

 

[BlueFiend]

Judge by actions. You said she said she isn't interested in your friend.
She isn't "owned" by him.
I think you should try.
If he is really your friend he won't be upset cause he blew it of and you didn't.

You're absolutely right, really good point.

I think I've been really stupid, I knew that she liked me, and I tried to act all aloof and ignorant eg. trying to avoid her gaze as much as possible, not hang around with her or her friends. I'm starting to see how stupid that was, but I was trying to be like the guy she couldn't get so she would keep chasing me (not to say she isn't anymore). Hmm, I'll probably start showing my attraction through body language and nonverbal communication, see where things go.

 

[NorwegianDJ]

Take the lead, and she's yours.

 

[Konada]

You're absolutely right, really good point.

I think I've been really stupid, I knew that she liked me, and I tried to act all aloof and ignorant eg. trying to avoid her gaze as much as possible, not hang around with her or her friends. I'm starting to see how stupid that was, but I was trying to be like the guy she couldn't get so she would keep chasing me (not to say she isn't anymore). Hmm, I'll probably start showing my attraction through body language and nonverbal communication, see where things go.

Time to man up and stop playing mind games with her. Leave that to them. No 'showing attraction via body language and non-verb communication.' Just ask her out, its the biggest sign of attraction you can give and she'd be dumb if she doesn't pick up on it.

Also don't worry about your friend, as Pozitron said he doesn't own her so its fair game. However, I suggest you talk to your friend about this. A girl ain't worth a friendship with a bro.

 

[BlueFiend]

Time to man up and stop playing mind games with her. Leave that to them. No 'showing attraction via body language and non-verb communication.' Just ask her out, its the biggest sign of attraction you can give and she'd be dumb if she doesn't pick up on it.

Also don't worry about your friend, as Pozitron said he doesn't own her so its fair game. However, I suggest you talk to your friend about this. A girl ain't worth a friendship with a bro.

Thanks for all the help guys. I hate to sound like an AFC, but I really have to ask: How would I go about asking her out? I've known her for a long time, and we see each other 5 days a week. And what would we do, seeing a movie would feel really awkward for me, and I can't really think of anything else. Sorry to sound like a noob guys, your help is really appreciated.

 

[Konada]

Thanks for all the help guys. I hate to sound like an AFC, but I really have to ask: How would I go about asking her out? I've known her for a long time, and we see each other 5 days a week. And what would we do, seeing a movie would feel really awkward for me, and I can't really think of anything else. Sorry to sound like a noob guys, your help is really appreciated.

Do you have her number. You can either ask her in person, or do it over the phone (no texting as it gives her leeway/time to pull some well thought BS you will never see coming.) Just approach her, get right to the point: 'Hey XXX, I'm planning to go (insert activity) this coming Friday, I want you to come along with me.

The key here is to expect her to say yes, people have the uncanny ability to pick up insecurity so be confident when you ask for a date. It doesn't matter how you ask it if she's interested in you (if she still is). Try to ask on a Monday/Tuesday when plans are not made up yet.

Oh and try to make your first date an action date. As they say, first impression counts. Roller blading/bowling etc give great opportunities to sneak in kino without looking creepy. The key here is to do what you enjoy, she is just tagging along for the ride. Don't see as a 'date' rather see it as a time to share your interests with someone else. Many guys here fail because they see the 'date' as a holy grail and end up supplicating the girl to make her feel nice.

You will also want to hit up the DJ Bible asap. You need alot of work, I'm just providing info cos the window of opportunity will close fast if you don't act soon (I learnt it the hard way). Good luck and PM me if you have any further questions.

 

[Jack Wealthy]

Ask if she wants to go out with you. It's such a symbolic gesture that it doesn't have to be specific. "Do you want to go out with me?" If she asks where say "Over there?" and smile. It's the gesture and intent of her being your girlfriend, not a date. Everyone knows what going out is, it is so common in this generation you don't actually have to plan as long as the attraction is strong.