what should be the natural progression?

[Bigworm]

i have this girl in my class , who i see three times a week. i already got her number and called her last week to go party with me. however she told me to call her when we left the dorm. then she called me again telling me to call her when i found a party. i noticed this might have a test from her and didnt call her back. in the end she stayed in not doing anything. my first question is did i do the right thing in not calling back?

2nd part - so its this week and i was thinking should i invite her again to go party but this time tell her to come meet me in my room? and since im inviting her to a party should i move in for a kiss even though is going to be the first date?


advice to a college boy from BU -boston would be greatly appreciated__

 

[JonJack]

Most probably she thinks you never did find a party to go to and it was best if you informed her that she doesn't have to wait so that she doesn't get pissed off by wasting her time waiting for nothing to happen.

Even if she still has interest, don't use party again. Use something else. If you say party, it'll remind her of before. And if she was indeed pissed off before, she will definitely say no to you. As for the kissing bit, it all depends on how interested she is. Look for the signs and behaviour, which should need no explanation.

 

[StrivetoThrive]

Dude,
You got the digits, and you are in Boston, one of the best cities in America, a city of which I live 2 mins away from(not currently cuz im at school too). You can be pretty money with this one. Find a party a couple of days ahead of time, get your friends to go, call her up and tell her that theres something going on and she should bring her friends and make a night out of it. Dont tell her to meet you at your room by the way, that might be a little creepy considering it would be your first time hanging out together (plus you may want to bring her back there later, depending on how the night goes). As for progression, after she says yes, take her and her friends to said party- meeting them in a neutral location so as to again, not weird them out. Have a couple of drinks and loosen up, you dont want to be stiff and boring, but dont get real drunk. Have some stimulating conversation, make her laugh by busting her chops a lil bit, make her feel comfortable to be around you. Towards the later end of the night, ask her if you can walk her back when shes ready to go (pretty gentlemanly and underrated, in my opinion). Take her back if she says yes, get a little closer while youre walking with some kino (maybe arm around, hand hold, etc etc.) and if it feels like it is going right, kiss her and if she invites you in rock it until the wheels fall off. That is some progression right there. If shes not comfortable with you walking her back or if her friends are cackblocking you from doing so (which may very well happen), tell her you had a nice time and that you should hang out another time, give her a hug and a kiss on the cheek. That will look pimp because it made you not look desperate and her friends will think it is cute, and they will give you valuable social proof which will give you the carte blanche for further rockage. Even if you fall short of whatever goals you have for the night take comfort in the fact that you are gaining valuable experience that will make you a better mack over time. Good luck and god speed.

 

[Wyldfire]

Rule #1 when asking someone out...

Have solid, set plans before asking.

 

[Bigworm]

thax guys those are some good answers

 

[Maniax]

Originally posted by Wyldfire
Rule #1 when asking someone out...

Have solid, set plans before asking.

Another great post by wyldfire! She's on a roll guys!

 

[Delta Male]

Hey dude! I go to BU too! Here's my take on this situation:

Personally I would have called back. If you're a cool guy and she's attracted to you, you don't have to worry about playing these little games over the phone. Yes it would have been a little bit of supplication, but this is one of the cases where you should let the rules slide. She might lose a little bit of attraction for you temporarily, but you can easily get it back once you have her at a party and you can game her.

As for your second question, if a girl in with a group of friends, I just tell them to meet me in front of Claflin (my dorm). If she's alone, there's nothing wrong with telling her to meet you in your room. Dorm rooms aren't like private apartments, people are always coming and going, so it's not creepy to ask her to meet you there. Plus, it gets her used to the idea of hanging out there, which can be good for later...unless you get ****blocked by security

I always go for a kiss when I bring girls to parties if I see even the slightest opportunity. Come on, it's a party -- people are hooking up all over the place, don't worry about it being the "second date" or whatever. Lots of guys hook up with girls they met only hours or minutes ago.

By the way, if you ever want to wing we me and hit up the mall or some parties, just shoot me a PM. We're having a party this Friday, if you want to come.

-Dan

Dan, the cool RSI intern
http://www.rapidsocialimpact.com