i've done a fair bit of observation and i noticed most guys are deathly afraid of actually approaching a female. i mean a proper approach, getting liquored up at the club in order to do it doesnt count, come on man, when i see that i can't help but shake my head. what does this mean? for those competent and willing enough i think it works to your advantage.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
what % of men aren't chumps and actually approach?
- Thread starter Heman6
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"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
The majority of dudes today don't approach at all and whack off at home.
Some guys join social clubs and sh!t like that and wait till an average/ugly girl makes a move on them.
That's basically how the vast majority of guys get girlfriends. By settling.
Some guys join social clubs and sh!t like that and wait till an average/ugly girl makes a move on them.
That's basically how the vast majority of guys get girlfriends. By settling.
i am thoroughly convinced that is the case because when i am out in public i never see it happen and when i do the approach is ALWAYS under the guise of "friendship". 95% of the time without fail. these guys think women are stupid as if they don't know the only reason they came over to talk is to get into their pants. so what we basically have is a bunch of people in denial ashamed of their masculinity and unwilling to embrace it. and i fault the men more than the women. the women have no choice, they can't appear to easy unless they are street walkers for the sake of their reputation but the men are painfully bad they can get away with sexually crude and are scared of doing what is natural and showing who they are.ChrizZ said:The majority of dudes today don't approach at all and whack off at home.
Some guys join social clubs and sh!t like that and wait till an average/ugly girl makes a move on them.
That's basically how the vast majority of guys get girlfriends. By settling.
I.A.F.Y.B.
Master Don Juan
Stop worrying about what other chumps do. Its not helping your game..
i know and it's not supposed to. i'm just plugging away at an observation i made that should encourage the newcomers.I.A.F.Y.B. said:Stop worrying about what other chumps do. Its not helping your game..
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
you can be a chump and still be confident and approach. I see it at the gym everyday. The psychotic, sociopaths, who have the confidence (craziness) to go up to any woman and stand there till she gives him the number. I saw this tonight. I was scared for her. It was creepy, but it ended up in a conversation about how creepy he was with her. So next time I talk to her, I will ask if she's single and then have monkey sex.
Virtually no men will approach a woman in every day situations. A few men might start a conversation sometimes, but it's just that, a conversation, they don't end up going for the close (her number.)
An approach doesn't have to be absolutely perfect. You just have to do a fairly good job, not do anything stupid, and approach a lot of women.
An approach doesn't have to be absolutely perfect. You just have to do a fairly good job, not do anything stupid, and approach a lot of women.
that's exactly it. i plan on going to lengths most men won't go such as approaching in every day situations (within reason of course. if she's eating i'm not going to bother her) it's a much bigger challenge that way and will at least set me apart from the rest.
i am sure women in the day time are harder to game and that is fine. i'm not worried about my ego since i haven't exactly had much success. i'm used to rejection but i was operating from a different mental frame at the time and i never attempted anything quite liek this.
i am sure women in the day time are harder to game and that is fine. i'm not worried about my ego since i haven't exactly had much success. i'm used to rejection but i was operating from a different mental frame at the time and i never attempted anything quite liek this.
Ganondorf!
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Actually day game is much easier than club/bar junk because women usually aren't expecting it and are not there just for attention from guys.Heman6 said:that's exactly it. i plan on going to lengths most men won't go such as approaching in every day situations (within reason of course. if she's eating i'm not going to bother her) it's a much bigger challenge that way and will at least set me apart from the rest.
i am sure women in the day time are harder to game and that is fine. i'm not worried about my ego since i haven't exactly had much success. i'm used to rejection but i was operating from a different mental frame at the time and i never attempted anything quite liek this.
also I've seen a lot of other guys approach. it's not as rare as you think, but it is pretty uncommon. most of it I heard about from the bar when My ex gf told me, but a fairly decent number of guys would atleast say something to her. most of it is just lewd comments and stupid pick up lines, but guys do say some things
however worrying about what other guys do won't help you improve at all. worry about whether you approach or not and the percentage that you approach
everywomanshero
Master Don Juan
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Guys approach in certain situations, like bars when they are drunk. Most of the time the guy is either so drunk his speech is slurred or makes it out to be a joke because he has no confidence in himself at all and believes he has no chance in hell of actually taking her home.
Even if the girl is so desperate that she still talks to him, he will likely still have no real confidence and will try to sneak off with her number after 5 minutes (before he screws it up, he fears) rather than actually going for it. The odds they will ever talk again, not good.
A lot of guys probably meet their gfs/wives through work or friends or other settings where they are introduced to each other through the setting rather than a cold approach, but that doesn't mean cold approaches are not effective.. but one needs to be reasonable. I've taken a woman home after 15 min of convo in a bar, but I've never had one answer my call the next night after 5 minutes of chatting in a bar. This isn't a game for big chickens.
Even if the girl is so desperate that she still talks to him, he will likely still have no real confidence and will try to sneak off with her number after 5 minutes (before he screws it up, he fears) rather than actually going for it. The odds they will ever talk again, not good.
A lot of guys probably meet their gfs/wives through work or friends or other settings where they are introduced to each other through the setting rather than a cold approach, but that doesn't mean cold approaches are not effective.. but one needs to be reasonable. I've taken a woman home after 15 min of convo in a bar, but I've never had one answer my call the next night after 5 minutes of chatting in a bar. This isn't a game for big chickens.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
i'd say less than 10% approach on a regular basis
i've actually been asking girls how often they get hit on recently and it's surprising. The avg looking girls get hit on 3-4x per night and the really hot ones NEVER get approached (the ones i talk to at least). This may be b/c there are a lot of chumps in my area
i've actually been asking girls how often they get hit on recently and it's surprising. The avg looking girls get hit on 3-4x per night and the really hot ones NEVER get approached (the ones i talk to at least). This may be b/c there are a lot of chumps in my area
depending on the location most girls don't really get approached. it's either they go to a club to get hit on by random guys or get hit on at work day in and day out by the same dudes. i was talking to a girl i knew the other day and she was making a big deal about how guys checked her out more then usual. she felt the need to ask her little brother even if she looked extra cute. i was very suprised to hear and i'm going to be blunt, the lack of self confidence and approval seeking coming from her because she is considered "good looking" and i don't see how she can't be possibly be drowned in attention as it is.
no, it's not easy you are right about it. this is serious and no joke which is probably why most guys don't really want to do it...you are putting your ego on the line and no one wants to feel the sting of rejection. i just see as a big challenge to overcome and being an extremist it's usually all or nothing. i sure can't lose anymore then i've lost and at least it'll make me stand out. i'm looking to get to the point where i can just go up to any girl in public and do my thing.
no, it's not easy you are right about it. this is serious and no joke which is probably why most guys don't really want to do it...you are putting your ego on the line and no one wants to feel the sting of rejection. i just see as a big challenge to overcome and being an extremist it's usually all or nothing. i sure can't lose anymore then i've lost and at least it'll make me stand out. i'm looking to get to the point where i can just go up to any girl in public and do my thing.
Son of anarchy
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You mean that probably the real hot ones make most of the guys afraid from their beauty?AllAction said:i'd say less than 10% approach on a regular basis
i've actually been asking girls how often they get hit on recently and it's surprising. The avg looking girls get hit on 3-4x per night and the really hot ones NEVER get approached (the ones i talk to at least). This may be b/c there are a lot of chumps in my area
Im curious to get some feedbacks from the other guys too,this sound interesting.
there is some truth to this but don't feel bad for them. yes hot girls can intimidate guys because of their looks or guys think they are already taken so they don't approach. this doesn't mean they go without though. look on myspace and facebook the hot girls usaully have a gazillion friends.Son of anarchy said:You mean that probably the real hot ones make most of the guys afraid from their beauty?
Im curious to get some feedbacks from the other guys too,this sound interesting.
everywomanshero
Master Don Juan
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Women are constantly comparing themselves to other women (both real and airbrushed in media), because they know both men and women are comparing them to other women!!!!!!!! We are judging their asses, their boobs, and other women are even more judgemental than we are!! So of course women have insecurities.
Ya jokers at work hitting on them in a goofy way (customers) or the sad, pathetic coworker who won't give up are common examples too lol One girl was pretending to be annoyed by flaunting how this rich old geezer hits on her the other day. He doesn't have a chance in hell but she still enjoys the ego boost, and I think he gets some kind of kick out of flirting with her so it's not a bad thing. Another guy I know meets basically all his gfs at work, there is a high staff turnover there and he isn't big on approaching anyway.
One of the great myths perpetuated by PUA crap is that you have to do something special to get girls interested. The poor victim of such thinking walks around all day worrying about if he is holding his head at a perfect position, worried about if he says the exact right thing, worried about other guys and what they are doing, and often creates a situation twice as weird as just actually opening his mouth talking to someone about something that would make sense. I know of a guy who started taking classes to learn some chinese secret of how to hold his spine at a "perfect position" lol and I saw him once after this and he looked like someone shoved a huge dildo up his ass.
Ya jokers at work hitting on them in a goofy way (customers) or the sad, pathetic coworker who won't give up are common examples too lol One girl was pretending to be annoyed by flaunting how this rich old geezer hits on her the other day. He doesn't have a chance in hell but she still enjoys the ego boost, and I think he gets some kind of kick out of flirting with her so it's not a bad thing. Another guy I know meets basically all his gfs at work, there is a high staff turnover there and he isn't big on approaching anyway.
One of the great myths perpetuated by PUA crap is that you have to do something special to get girls interested. The poor victim of such thinking walks around all day worrying about if he is holding his head at a perfect position, worried about if he says the exact right thing, worried about other guys and what they are doing, and often creates a situation twice as weird as just actually opening his mouth talking to someone about something that would make sense. I know of a guy who started taking classes to learn some chinese secret of how to hold his spine at a "perfect position" lol and I saw him once after this and he looked like someone shoved a huge dildo up his ass.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Ask those hot girls again if they frequently get guys offering to help them with something, or starting a conversation (without being an obvious come-on) for no reason.AllAction said:i'd say less than 10% approach on a regular basis
i've actually been asking girls how often they get hit on recently and it's surprising. The avg looking girls get hit on 3-4x per night and the really hot ones NEVER get approached (the ones i talk to at least). This may be b/c there are a lot of chumps in my area
The hotter the girl is, the less blatant come-ons she will get, but it doesn't mean that she necessarily gets "approached" any less.
Your average guy doesn't approach girls regularly, as in not making it a habit, but he will go through a couple of patches where he approaches like a machine, and after enough failures or random luck that gets him a GF, he will stop approaching for a long time.