"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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What music do you play when you have a lady over?

The Forms

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What albums do you guys like to play in the background when you have a girl over? I used to just turn my itunes on random, but you end up with a lot of stuff that's great music, but doesn't really set that warm, comfortable mood you need to move things along (like Led Zep or Cash).

So what albums have that vibe that is nice and warm, kind of slow and comfortable that just lets you relax with a girl and you can move into things? I like to pick stuff that's great music, but not too fast or loud. Something that can also serve to be a source of conversation, or can just be on in the background while you guys get started that doesn't really take all of your attention.

The albums that I like are:

The Shin - Oh, Inverted World
Phantom Planet - The Guest
Nick Drake - any of it works
Elliott Smith - same as with Nick Drake
Coldplay - Parachutes
The Flaming Lips - The Soft Bullitin or Yoshimi
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Lust

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The Forms said:
What albums do you guys like to play in the background when you have a girl over? I used to just turn my itunes on random, but you end up with a lot of stuff that's great music, but doesn't really set that warm, comfortable mood you need to move things along (like Led Zep or Cash).

So what albums have that vibe that is nice and warm, kind of slow and comfortable that just lets you relax with a girl and you can move into things? I like to pick stuff that's great music, but not too fast or loud. Something that can also serve to be a source of conversation, or can just be on in the background while you guys get started that doesn't really take all of your attention.

The albums that I like are:

The Shin - Oh, Inverted World
Phantom Planet - The Guest
Nick Drake - any of it works
Elliott Smith - same as with Nick Drake
Coldplay - Parachutes
The Flaming Lips - The Soft Bullitin or Yoshimi
....

Whatever i want. As long as it's not my death metal stuff, i'll put on anything.

But you really shouldn't give a damn, you shouldn't be worrying about her stay. It's a sign of neediness. Just keep it cool, be laid back, and she'll be all over you.

Oh one thing though,

If you hit LMR, i think it's great to put on a cheesy romantic song, then dance to it, ballroom style.

Woo.

HB: "Um, i'm not sure if i want to do this"

Me: "Sure, i understand, we don't have to do anything" (Act turned off straight away)
"Hey, let's dance!" *Put on cheesy song*

She'll crack up as soon as she hears what you have on, dance to it, kiss her, try again.

It builds further rapport just before sex, and the dancing to the kissing is a great way to get her into some heavy makeout and a transition to sex.
 

The Forms

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I'm talking about setting a mood. So "whatever I want" is whatever sets the mood. Its not like I'm going to be sitting around with her, and I HAVE to listen to Kenny Loggins right now if its not going to set the mood. I'm going to feel corny if I put on Richard Marx's greates hits. What I'm looking for is great, vibey albums that set a comfortable mood without looking cheesy.

I also realized some others

John Mayer
Jason Mraz
Maroon 5
Jack Johnson
 

Chemistry

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Hardly anything... I can't remember the last time that I went that route... I normally give a chick a showcase of songs which have been commercially released that I had produced... can't beat it! It's a little self-absorbed but I don't really care, lol...

But if playing music is your thing... grab yourself some nice lounge music... but please don't reach out for the Marvin Gaye joint because it's so fvckin obvious, lol... I've played that joint in the past and the chick would laugh when it came on... it didn't have any bearing on the outcome of the evening, she got fvcked and sent on her way, but it's just so cliche..

I guess, that said... if you're trying to 'romance' one of them hardcore rock chicks then you don't want to be playing none of that lounge music... you need some of that thrash metal - grab a chick by the hair, throw her in a g!mp mask before you p!ss on her to seal the deal - type sh!t, lol
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Flabbergasped?

Master Don Juan
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I listen to classical, and I've never used music for fear of humiliation lol
 
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