"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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What makes you want her?

marshman

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What are some things chicks do that make you want her more? Lately, this chick I've been talking to alot has seemed a bit distant. We used to email everyday and she was always really into me, making sexual references all the time and what not. Now she's going most the weekend without contacting me and I'm left wondering what she's up to and constantly thinking bout her, while before...it was almost too easy and I didn't care either way because she was just always there when I wanted. Now I find myself wanting her bad! What are other things they do to make you think about them all the time? Because it's driving me crazy, I don't want to get ONS!
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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MindOverMatter

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We used to email everyday and she was always really into me, making sexual references all the time and what not.
You made some giant mistakes.

1.) You shouldn't use e-mail/chat programs AT ALL. And you should only use phones to make plans. You should not communicate with her everyday, this is your biggest mistake. By spending little time talking to her outside of dates, you make her LOOK FORWARD to the dates.

2.) If you really have to e-mail her, don't do it everyday. By waiting 2-3 days to answer an e-mail, you give off an impression that you lead a busy, exciting life. By being constantly in contact, she thinks you're some guy who has nothing better to do then check his e-mail all day, see if she wrote him, and write back immediatly.

3.) She gave you sexual references, you thought she was into you. One question? Why didn't you make a move? You waited too long and she got bored of waiting for you to make a move.

edit - 4.) I recommend reading the DJ Bible if you already haven't
 

backbreaker

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1.) You shouldn't use e-mail/chat programs AT ALL. And you should only use phones to make plans. You should not communicate with her everyday, this is your biggest mistake. By spending little time talking to her outside of dates, you make her LOOK FORWARD to the dates.
That's bull****. don't give people advice that YOU think is right, you are confusing people. Different people have different views about emails and chat programs. Me personally I am a phone person, and I NEVER use Chatting programs like AIM but everyonce in a while, and I do mean every once in a while, I will shoot an email to someone. Sue me. In my opinion, if a girl is interested in you, she is not going to loose interest just because you email her one or two times a week, if not less.



3.) She gave you sexual references, you thought she was into you. One question? Why didn't you make a move? You waited too long and she got bored of waiting for you to make a move.
I had this problem before. One girl litearly had an air traffic control center telling me she wanted me to take her, and I didn't. I had my reasons, and I was aware of what was going on, but I didn't.

What I had to do, is recreate her sexual feelings at a later date. This time she is bringing the subject up. Next time, you bring it up.
 

marshman

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I guess I should clarify that I work with her and DO talk to her in person, as well as email. We are sleeping together but I didn't care so much about it before because I knew I had her. She was always willing anytime, really into me. I never got bored really, just took it for granted. Now she isn't as interested it seems, not as desperate, lol. She's a HB9, no lie. I'm left wondering if I said or did something wrong.
 

MindOverMatter

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That's bull****. don't give people advice that YOU think is right, you are confusing people. Different people have different views about emails and chat programs. Me personally I am a phone person, and I NEVER use Chatting programs like AIM but everyonce in a while, and I do mean every once in a while, I will shoot an email to someone. Sue me. In my opinion, if a girl is interested in you, she is not going to loose interest just because you email her one or two times a week, if not less.
This whole forum is full of advices made by people who think their advice is right. As is your thread. Read the last two sentences of what I wrote in 1.), then re-read your comment.

I'll argue my point. E-mail/chat is a not (heh edit) a good way to communicate in a relationship. You say her interest level wont drop from an e-mail? Maybe. But lets say you're right and it doesn't drop.

It sure as hell wont increase in a way that it would from a live conversation. Eye-contact, genuine smiles, kino, relaxed voice, ****y and funny attitude are things that you cannot use when you talk to someone over e-mail/chat. It's a cold way to communicate in a relationship.

E-mailing her everyday is equal to calling her the day after you got her number. It makes you look too available, and desperate.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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DJ Alejandro

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1. YOU are supposed to be the one in control. not her.

2. emails etc., are supposed to REINFORCE relationships outside dates. not the main line.
 

ScrewIt

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similar to a friend. back early this semester, i had a female friend, we often hung out on weekends, and she'd call me up to hang out with her friends also. i did some kino, c&f, teasing her and etc....Then along the lines she brought up questions like how much gf's i've had, thought you said i acted like a guy, blah blah...then just by those questions and the way she acted, i knew i had gotten her wet for me.

then after awhile, she stoppeed calling me to hang out, the couples time i called her, she didnt even pick up her phone nor callme back....

then one of our friend's had a dinner party, we all went to.
she was quiet with me the whole night she was sitting next to me, she kinoed me on teh shoulder a few times...but after that still we didnt keep in contact. but it doesnt really bother me cause i didnt feel the same about her.

just keep in mind ifa girl's attitude change all of a sudden, then you know somehting's up.
 

DJ Alejandro

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Originally posted by ScrewIt
just keep in mind ifa girl's attitude change all of a sudden, then you know somehting's up.
my experience dictates its just that time of the month.
 

backbreaker

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Originally posted by MindOverMatter
This whole forum is full of advices made by people who think their advice is right. As is your thread. Read the last two sentences of what I wrote in 1.), then re-read your comment.

I'll argue my point. E-mail/chat is a not (heh edit) a good way to communicate in a relationship. You say her interest level wont drop from an e-mail? Maybe. But lets say you're right and it doesn't drop.

It sure as hell wont increase in a way that it would from a live conversation. Eye-contact, genuine smiles, kino, relaxed voice, ****y and funny attitude are things that you cannot use when you talk to someone over e-mail/chat. It's a cold way to communicate in a relationship.

E-mailing her everyday is equal to calling her the day after you got her number. It makes you look too available, and desperate.

That's exactly what I am saying, however I am letting you know that what I am saying is just my opinion on what I would do, not saying that it is the law that must be followed at all times.

I am not saying what you are saying is horrible advice... for a newbie it is even good advice because it stops you from messing up, but I think you get what i am trying to say.
 

ScrewIt

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Originally posted by DJ Alejandro
my experience dictates its just that time of the month.
Lol

well what i meant in my sentence is if they act aloof in such a way that you can tell they're too shy/indimiated in your presence to act normal around you.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

Read more...

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