What makes a good conversation?

[goodfella86]

Im in college and unfotunately I stick to pretty simple topics like major, where you live....all the boring conversation stuff. I know you're supposed to look for things about her or the enviroment, but sometimes I just draw a blank when Im chatting up a girl. Is there any type of default story or convo that you use to rebound a conversation or break into a new one?

 

[T Money]

Well, nothing makes a girl more happy then having you listen to her ramble. So ask her about her..."So, do you have a hobby/passion in life?"

If their answer is "no" then I usually lose interest, but that's just me.

Also, just keep asking questions, you don't need to come off as some guy who always has some interesting topic to talk about, let HER do that.

Also, instead of asking boring questions like "What kind of music do you listen to?", spice it up: "What were the last 3 CD's in your CD player?" Because usually when you ask a girl "What kind of music do you listen to?" It's usually "I listen to everything"...yeah right. No one listens to everything.

You see what i'm getting at here?

 

[T Money]

Also, pretend like you know her. Make her feel comfortable. You can say stupid ****: "Wow, that tree is far away." Well, not that, but you know, dumb stuff that will make her laugh.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Well, nothing makes a girl more happy then having you listen to her ramble.

FYI guys, this is old information. More and more women are getting frustrated with men who expect them to keep a conversation going. You'll need to give as much as you take.

 

[DarkLight]

Best conversations are emotionally rich. Its all about feeling, and the curiosities/perceptions your setting up in her mind, about you.

I've travelled extensively for my age, so often when bullsh!tting the conversation will take that turn at some stage in reference. It sets up the worldy-man perception, the international player perception, etc. I'll roll into some stories of me with other women abroad, and how I had to jump on to a leaving boat (full movie style) in thailand, to get away from this cutie british/thai minx.

Illustrate value, humor, experience, etc. Bottom line... VALUE AND EMOTION!
Thats what you want your conversations to achieve.

Figure out the things you have going for you, that will achieve these 2 elements. Then let your creativity go to work and imagine some good fun questions that will lead the conversation in such directions.

For example in my case...
"So if you were a cool enough chick, and I was to give you a first-class ticket anywhere in the world.......... where would you go?"

That achieves many things.
A. Sets a frame of her wanting to be "cool enough" with me.
B. Tells her she "MIGHT" have the opportunity to experience some of her worldly dreams through me.
C. I have the status and means to pull some of that sh!t off.
D. Gives you insight into what her flavor/taste is.
E. Steers the conversation into a new direction (I CHOSE), in which I can demonstrate personal value (through my experience).

Sh!t like that.

Now... I'm not saying any of those perceptions have to be real. Cause its just a fun question to find out "who this chick is." Nothing more, nothing less. So, whether she wants to embrace the subcommunication of that question as real or not... doesn't matter... it will still be communicated (and to my advantage).

You want to set up something fun, bigger than life, adventure, mystery, hope, greatness, VALUE/EMOTION.

Another little thing I notice I do in conversations, when they go blank is... UTILIZE IT. They're like massive spaces of attention. EXCELLENT! A simple look in her eye... then kino... POWERFUL. It can be done in fun, or serious pimp sh!t. Whatever level your sarge is at.

Poke her belly. lol... sh!t whatever. It will fire up emotion, fun, and take her down a notch in feelings of potential insecurity.

Rub the back of your finger down her upper arm. Then a sexy genuine smile, with eye contact. Boom... OWNED.

Enjoy the interaction. No need to stress over if the technicalities are in place. Let feeling be your guide.

The ball-busting teasing dynamic is so great cause it achieves the 2 elements of emotion and value. Its fun and all the while expresses your a man of value. Your not sapping on her every word in AFC-eeking approval, etc. Its a lil feist.

Get yourself a few golden questions/stories/leading statements, whatever... that achieve the 2 elements, specifically catering to your character's value. Keep'em in your back pocket. When a pause comes... lovely. You have a thousand and one responses. And worst case... go Juggler's route. Just allow the interaction to have its silent pause. As you would with a real friend. If you can comftorably relax through it... and allow things to spark up again as they will... you've achieved a very powerful dynamic.

Peace'

 

[Distant Light]

^^^
Has the right idea

Another thing to remember is the conversations don't have to be naturally similar. Like say you are talking about food and then going into vegetables but you want to start talking about trucks. You can easily just cut that thread and talk about trucks and come back to vegetables if you choose.

This was one thing that I didn't get until a few months back I would constantly be thinking how can I lead the conversation towards what I want to say and only time I used to us canned material back then was when we weren't in a conversation.

Another thing its best to always be leading and holding the conversation unless your in rapport. You don't her bringing up boring topics so try and keep the conversations fun and fresh.