"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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What is with his girl

Ricard78

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There is this woman at my work who i sit next to, we always have a chat and a laugh, recently i noticed she started calling me names and saying how much se hates me when we joke around , also if i talk about any sexual experience she acts as though she is repulsed saying things like "that would be a sight" , i think i know the answer but i still feel i need to ask.

Is this a game?

What should i start doing back to her.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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OneArmDeeJay

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1. How is her tone? You say you two are joking but it seems like your taking it personally.

2. Stop trying to dip your pen in company ink and do your work.

3. Be careful of what you say because it might just come back and bite you on the ass. It’s called Sexual Harassment.

4. Do your work and only talk to her about work related topics if need be.
 

Ricard78

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Her tone is jokey, but has a hint of seriousness in it. Im not taking it personally im just not sure how she feels.

This i not a case of harrasment, im not rude or leud the convos about sexual stuff was between a table of four of us.

I I work as hard as anyone else there, we have a relaxed office atmophere, were enouraged to chat hile we work.
 

spider_007

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.....and you care because???

would a Jerk care???

also, there is a fine line between joking and getting anoying....
There should be same amount of jokes coming from her as there is from you. I know a few guys who can't see the line and keep pushing to the point where you have to tell him, fvck off, that's enough.

make sure your not crosing the line (make sure your not the only one laughing.)
 

Ricard78

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I dont think i have pushed anything to much, but i think she has a little. Its not so much that i care or not mate, there are loads or girl around, i just have not come accross this game of hers before.

Im very confident im not an AFC or anything, its just an unusual game i have not come accros before. I was thinkin of king the girl out unill he started acting like this, its a though she is scared of my confience in myself.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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OneArmDeeJay

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She’s not scared of you bro. Just annoyed. Leave her alone. There is no game being played but only the fact that she’s just being nice and trying to give you hints like people trying to help you know but just ain't getting it.

Unless she’s touching you, laughing at things you say, teasing you, and all those good signs then yeah shes playing games and is interested. But this girl from what you told us isn't. Leave it alone.

And you have pushed things when you started talking about your sexual experiences. And I quote...
also if i talk about any sexual experience she acts as though she is repulsed saying things like "that would be a sight" , i think i know the answer but i still feel i need to ask.
I believe that’s grounds for sexual harassment.
 

Ricard78

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quote:also if i talk about any sexual experience she acts as though she is repulsed saying things like "that would be a sight" , i think i know the answer but i still feel i need to ask.

I believe that’s grounds for sexual harassment.

When did people like u start coming here. I came for real advice, i know what sexual harrasment is. She and the other people on my bank of desks were all talking sexually does that mean i should do them for sexual harrasment.

Christ if you dont get sexual around women i fail to see how you land any.

Where have all the guys who discuss things gone, im not saying your totally wrong in what you say but tarnishing me as someone who sexually harrases someone, please get a grip.
 

OneArmDeeJay

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I do have a grip. And I'm not trying to personally attack you I'm just telling you like it is and keepin it real. There is a time and place for everything and that kind of talk isn't approiate at work especially if the girl isn't feeling you. If you and your co-workers talk about it then whatever. And i'm ont saying you shouldn't but there can be consequences. And hey stop getting caught up on every little word. You say you don't think you are pushing any thing yet I tell you you are. You ask what we think we tell you.
 

Ricard78

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Well duly noted what you said, i just got off the phone to a DJ buddy of mine and he says the complete opposite but hey i guess we all think differently.

He thinks by one of his own experiences that the girl thinks im to ****ey with my attitude so she is trying to bring me down a peg or two. because she is uncofortable with how comfortable i am in myself.

To be honsest....with such conflicting ideas by the two of you i will probebly give her a miss altogether and move on to the swedish chick two banks over.
 

OneArmDeeJay

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Hmm yeah that could be it too.

Everyone has different views you know. So you just got to take everything with a grain of salt and then make your own decsion and do what you feel is right.

Best of Luck my friend...
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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flexion_

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I wouldn't try and date anyone you work with that closely if thats in your mind.

Also, I wouldn't bring up sexual stuff with women at work unless you really know them well as that can blow up in your face pretty quickly.
 
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